FacingFibro 🪷

I force feed myself breakfast everyday.

No matter how delicious it looks, I just don’t crave it.

No matter how hungry I am, I’m just not satisfied.

fast forward a couple of hours and my mood has done a 180.

I’m sipping on a coconut lemonade that I made the minute I arrived home and I’m enjoying the sunshine from my couch.

I feel content and relaxed and I’m looking forward to the evening.

I may take a walk. I will make some dinner and take a shower followed by a face mask and my favourite lotion. I’ll turn on my animal crossing and read a book I’ve been meaning to open.

I’ll make my lunch for tomorrow and take my vitamins and stretch my body out. I’ll clear my mind with meditation and have a good long nights sleep.

it feels as if no matter what I do I find zero joy and satisfaction from it. if anything I feel more exhausted and overwhelmed after doing anything.

I used to have dreams and goals and have things that made me feel relaxed and satisfied. like the morning rain or the sun pouring in through the sunroof, a good song on a beautiful warm day, my dog cuddled up to me, my favourite meal hot on the stove, a coffee from the best coffee shop. now those things just make me feel nothing. of course I am grateful for everything I have and everything I am able to receive and afford. but these things don’t provide me with any sense of happiness or satisfaction. just numbness.

I think of the time I could be spending doing other things more productive. I think of the money I could be saving. I think of the money I could be making. I think of how my house could be cleaner, more organized.

For years I’ve been trying to sever my connection to other people in the way of people pleasing. I can’t say it’s been easy. I thought I was getting a lot better at it until I found myself choosing careers because I thought others would think I was “impressive or successful” rather than picking a job that suits my chronic illness and physical ailments.

I quit my job that I loved so much. It was something that made me feel powerful. Strong. Courageous. Capable of anything. But on the other hand, the next day when my body was in pain from the laborious tasks I had to complete, I felt weak. Run down. Unworthy. Incapable.

But after the last few weeks of having so much time to contemplate my thoughts and what I want in this lifetime, I realized I’m the only one making myself feel that way. I am being the destruction and chaos in my own world.

My opinion is the only one that truly matters because in the end I’ll be the one living with myself, every moment of every single day and I deserve to feel worthy and valued and in complete harmony with myself and whatever career path I end up choosing.

Your career doesn’t define you.

Your illness doesn’t define you.

Your problems don’t define you.

Your thoughts, goals, perception of yourself, perception of the world, the way you treat your family and friends, the way you care for your body, the way you take care of your home and environment, your likes and dislikes, your muse, your morals, your faith. That’s what defines you and you’re always the moderator of what defines you.

Don’t let others create the life you live.

Take care of yourself as if you would an ill loved one. You deserve that cozy blanket, with the good show, a hot bath and that warm cup of tea.

Be kind to your body and what love it can manage to give you today and what love you can manage to give it.

Yoga is a wonderful option for some pain relief with Fibromyalgia and chronic pain in general. Yoga can help release tension from cramped up and tense muscles. Yoga is also a great stress buster and helps to reduce those feelings and effectively relax our nervous system. If you’re like me, high intensity workouts hurt me more than help me - being able to ease into each yoga pose slowly and be able to hold it for as long as it feels good for you and your body helps you feel both relaxed in your muscles and energized in your mind.

I like to curate a morning and evening yoga routine with the few practices I keep in my back pocket for those extremely high pain days.

Here’s a few yoga poses I suggest to help release some of that fibromyalgia tension and pain most of us experience:

1. Childs Pose - This asana helps to calm the mind.

It also gives a good stretch to the arms, shoulders, back, and hips.

2. Legs up the wall pose - By taking the weight off your feet, this pose helps relax the muscles of the hips and legs.

It relieves you of fatigue, a major symptom of fibromyalgia.

3. Cobra Pose - This pose helps flex the upper and middle back, another main affected area in fibromyalgia.

It also helps strengthen the arm muscles.

It helps improve blood circulation to various parts of the body.

It reduces fatigue; you feel deeply relaxed as you open up your shoulders and chest.

4. Bridge pose - This gives you a deep stretch to your back and wards off fatigue.

It also helps calm the nervous system so you feel less anxious.

It strengthens the back muscles, a possible tender point in those suffering from fibromyalgia.

5. Corpse Pose - It calms the mind and reduces both stress and fatigue.

It relieves headaches and sundry pains.

It helps you sleep better at night.

It may take you some time to get adjusted to these poses and how they feel for you but I advise to at least try them once, once a day, even just for 30 seconds. You’ve got this and most importantly…always listen to what your body needs from you. There’s no shame in having to adjust for ourselves and what we need to feel better in our bodies. Take care everyone 🦋

Ps. I posted some photos of each pose in the comments from google..each picture has the name of the pose underneath it. 🪬 and I also included a photo of my adorable yoga partner, my doodle who loves to join me on my mat everyday.

Think of those things we are grateful for❤️