exholalia

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek

so strange when people assume 'waking up early' means increased productivity bc no??? im awake so i can read fanfic in bed before breakdown breakfast

who on earth is out there waking up early to get shit done??? the purpose of waking up early is to have QUIET TIME LOUNGING IN BED before the world gets LOUD & ANNOYING AS FUCK

both 30 years old, born on the same day at precisely the same millisecond, but she was born in the state of Arizona which does not observe daylight savings time so one could possibly make the (weak) argument that she's an hour older. problematic age gap?

alright alright how about this other chick. she was born orbiting a black hole and due to relativistic effects currently unexplained by established models we are both 14 million years younger than eachother. help me with the ethics of this

Accepting identities I don't understand is actually extremely easy because I just go "this isn't about me" and move on with my life unbothered by someone else's identity, it's truly that simple.

i heard someone say once, “you don’t need to speak French to acknowledge that it’s a language that exists”. and i feel like more ppl need to keep that in mind when they come across something they don’t understand.

Ozempic scares the shit out of me. You're telling me there's a drug that takes away both the craving side of hunger and targets the brain's rewards center for eating. You're telling me it takes the joy out of eating and it turns you into a skeleton. Why did we turn The Curse of the Black Pearl into a drug. What the fuck.

(USAmerican trying to imagine a societal environment) Okay, so picture a highway,

inability to correctly perceive 3d objects is in fact far more dangerous when someone is driving a car next to you then when they're like, sending emails to you.

can we focus on the gnome for a second

wait sorry i was not wearing my glasses. that is a cat

these are the people i have to share a highway with

Remember when Xbox was going to basically ban used games for the xbox one, and Playstation made fun of them with that video titled "how to share games on Playstation" and it was just one guy handing another a game disk? And now Playstation is getting rid of physical disks entirely

Sheets, towels, PILLOWS (omg REPLACE YOUR PILLOWS), socks, doormats, tea towels, bras, cutlery (sometimes)

A while ago the handle broke off a bottle of cleaning solution, and I spent multiple cleaning sessions painstakingly trying to line up the broken nub with the place it's supposed to press and juust managing to get it to spray. Recently I remembered I can pour the stuff into a new empty spray bottle from the dollar store! Wow!

Realised I can just buy extra pegs instead of struggle to have enough pegs for the laundry. Incredible, now everything I hang out gets a peg and my laundry doesn't get spread over the yard.

Reblog if you were born in the 1900's.

having the Aviation Accident Investigations Autism™️ has actually done wonders for the way I process and respond to my own fuck-ups

Understanding the difference between "learned helplessness" (a form of trauma/disability inflicted when outcomes are disconnected from actions) and "weaponised incompetence" (intentionally doing things badly having decided that you don't want to be asked to do them) is all very well but it's not gonna stop ableists from using the latter to DARVO disabled partners.

Sometimes, if I'm feeling really crazy, sometimes I take one more vitamin D tablet than I'm supposed to. Just to live dangerously.

some bozo with the username laundryguy47 keeps jumping in to all my Halo matches and ruining them. what he does is he turns them into some kinda laundry RP. ok, listen, what i mean is, when he joins the game he gets on mic and tells everyone to go to a certain spot on the map and pretend like its a coin operated laundromat and we're all doing laundry there. and they just do it. everybody stops killing eachother like you're supposed to in the game and they go pretend to do laundry for the whole match. nobody even questions it, they all just do it like thats normal. but that's not normal. its sickening and it cant be allowed to continue

some of the sessions have been kinda fun though i gotta say. there's actually quite a bit more depth to pretend laundry than you might think. lately ive been experimenting with pretending to use fabric softener

I'm reminded of the time when I used to play Stick Arena. For those unaware, it was an old game where you play as a stick figure and you're violently murdering other players. There was a dude who, instead of killing people like normal, wanted to pretend to play on the computer in the office map. People kept trying to get free kills off him because he wasn't fighting back, all he'd do was complain that he was using the computer. I ended up guarding him to the best of my ability, killing players that would come to kill him. Bonus points, a lot of them would focus on trying to kill the unarmed guy and be unprepared for me attacking. Imagine trying to sneak up on a dude playing his computer and then you get hit with a sledgehammer.