Life In The Rockies Things:
Some movie needs “Exotic” animal noises for their spooky jungle scene or weird alien planet, but the sound team doesn’t know from animals, so there’s an Elk Bugling somewhere in The Amazon or Qualxon-5
Finding out that your sea-level friends start to pass out at 1,000 feet and realizing that you’ll have to meet them at the airport with oxygen cans or something.
Somehow forgetting, every year, then unpleasantly remembering after the first cold snap what single-digit humidity feels like when the water evaporates off your eyeballs.
No trick-or-treaters because the weather always sucks on Halloween
Completely Insane Tourist Questions ™: Large Animals And Geology Does Not Work Like That Edition.
Some places have all seasons in a day. Some have them all in five minutes. The Rockies have all four seasons in a quantum state where they all occur simultaneously. Sunados. Thundersnow. 70-degrees-and-pleasantly-sunny-but-also-hurricane-force-winds. Having your house be under Drought, Flood, Wildfire and Blizzard warnings at the same time. The Weather is Real like a deity and also an Asshole.
Knowing which choppers are flying into the regional hospital based on how long it takes them to find the damn pad. Park Service knows what the fuck they’re doing. Air Force is lost as hell and spends like 20 minutes circling the neighborhood.
Calling the police becuase the oil-or-gas rig near your house is making weird noises and the company didn’t label it so you have to meet the sherrif in your lot and ride out there with them and hope to god it isn’t a natural gas leak becuase it doesn’t have a smell fresh out of the ground.
Bearmaggedon
Water-Rights-Related Murder
Long winded editorial rants written in Authentic Frontier Gibberish, which is different than Regular Whackadoodle Gibberish. They attempt to write their accents in and make graphic references to field-dressing.
That lovely transcendent feeling you get in the Really High Country where your lungs feel clean and your soul renewed as you look upon the most magnificent landscape in the whole world, you feel like you could wax poetic about Purple Mountains Majesty and then your friend has to grab you because you almost pass out from lack of oxygen and fall off the side of the mountain while the marmots laugh at you.
