Epic Distraction. @epicdistraction - Tumblr Blog

Reblog if ur gay and tired of historians invalidating your ancient acts of eternal love w/ your dude

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mamoru

bitsow

4800 players, Beethoven’s 9th Symphony Speedrun

kaijuno

its not even music anymore it’s just a shockwave that kills you instantly

weavemama

If anyone in the future ever asks me what 2017 was like I’m just gonna show them this tweet

justanothercinemaniac

#Mood

cityelf

USA I’m sorry but if you let Romney get elected as President the rest of the world will have no choice but to break your section of the Earth off to float in space on its own until you come to your senses

Here’s a diagram to help you understand

cityelf

I dreamed a dream in time gone by

kyraneko

Romney.

disease-danger-darkness-silence

I cry for the days when Mitt Romney was the thing we were afraid of.

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2011: HA! GAAAYYYYYY!!1!!

2014: don't 👏 call 👏 things 👏 gay 👏 it's 👏 homophobic 👏

2017: everything is gay. shoes? gay. books? gay. the moon? gay. this post? gay.

slow-riot-deactivated20200720

Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil

tramampoline

its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies

catparazzi

at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes

awfullydull-deactivated20170619

FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS

AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT

DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER

FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY *Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe

1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.)

1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.)

½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.) After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load.

madsciences

^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent

ghostoftwentysomethingspast

WHAT Thank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give!

legallynonbinary

Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply.

Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco.

Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray.

Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda)

Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make.

legallynonbinary

I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets.

polar-academia-deactivated20230

I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one

apiologies-deactivated20170306

me rollerblading into my therapist’s office this week with sunglasses and a piña colada: maurice, you’re not gonna fucking believe this,

gerrycanavan

I’m afraid of Americans

This is super real.

Completely accurate.

Yup.

zanabism-deactivated20200529

lkfjglkdjflgkjsklLKJDFLKGJDLK

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nomehablen2

Ah…….annuzzer day in bikini bottem………

qozxe

Is anyone ever going to talk about the fact that George Washington is naked on the US quarter coin?

Look at his clearly defined neck and collarbone. He’s shirtless. Compare to Thomas Jefferson on the US nickel:

or Abraham Lincoln on the penny:

Franklin D Roosevelt on the dime cuts off at his neck, so it’s entirely possible that he’s wearing a shirt but it’s just not showing.

Why did the person who designed the quarter choose to leave him shirtless??? Why would they make the decision to leave his neck and collarbone exposed???? What new conspiracy is behind this wh

midiquartz

george washington wore nothing but a thong his entire presidency and no one has uncovered the truth Untill Now

lagoonas-deactivated20220915

when will tumblr give us color coded text i wanna talk shit in pink

fivelungs-blog

mobile takes long enough to load I don’t want to wait till the next ice age because y'all are aesthetic shitposting in chartreuse comic sans

My anxiety: somethings off

Me: how so?

Anxiety: somethings wrong

Me: what

Anxiety: something

Me: like can you give me a general idea

Anxiety: somethings off

factsinallcaps

THE LEGENDARY STORY OF THE TROJAN HORSE DOES NOT INVOLVE THE GREEKS GIVING THE HORSE TO THE TROJANS AS A GIFT. THE GREEKS’ DECEPTION WAS ACTUALLY THAT THEY LEFT THE HORSE AS AN OFFERING TO THE GODDESS ATHENA.

IN THE LEGEND, THEY BASICALLY SENT SOMEONE TO TROY TO SAY “THIS HORSE IS FOR ATHENA, NOT YOU, SO OUR RETREAT BACK TO GREECE IS SAFE. DON’T TRY TO TAKE IT. IT WON’T FIT THROUGH THE GATES OF YOUR CITY, SO THERE’S NO WAY YOU DICKS CAN STEAL IT AND PRETEND YOU GOT IT FOR ATHENA. NOT FOR TROJANS.”

AND THEN TROY WAS LIKE “YOU’RE NOT OUR DAD. WE WON THIS WAR AND WE’RE TAKING YOUR STUPID HORSE AS A TROPHY SO WE’LL ALWAYS REMEMBER HOW BAD GREECE IS AT DESTROYING TROY.”

AND A FEW TROJANS WERE LIKE “THIS IS A TRICK” AND TRIED TO EXPOSE IT AS A TRICK BUT THE REST OF THE TROJANS WOULD HAVE NONE OF IT BECAUSE EVERYONE WAS SWEPT UP IN THE THRILL OF VICTORY, AND ALSO BECAUSE THE GODS KEPT SENDING SNAKES TO STRANGLE ANYONE WHO SAID ANYTHING, BECAUSE THE GREEK GODS HAD NO WORD FOR “SUBTLETY”

THEN AT NIGHT ALL THE GREEKS JUMPED OUT OF THE HORSE LIKE “WE TOLD YOU NOT TO TAKE THE HORSE, WHY ARE YOU SUCH PRIDEFUL DICKS” AND BURNED DOWN THE WHOLE CITY

derinthescarletpescatarian

This makes a lot more sense

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deadgiriwalking

sherlockpins-deactivated2015110

UNMUTE THIS

wishyroses

i love this frickin video

legalizememes

litterbot

Scientists discover most relaxing tune ever

Sound therapists and Manchester band Marconi Union compiled the song. Scientists played it to 40 women and found it to be more effective at helping them relax than songs by Enya, Mozart and Coldplay. Weightless works by using specific rhythms, tones, frequencies and intervals to relax the listener. A continuous rhythm of 60 BPM causes the brainwaves and heart rate to synchronise with the rhythm: a process known as ‘entrainment’. Low underlying bass tones relax the listener and a low whooshing sound with a trance-like quality takes the listener into an even deeper state of calm.

lesbianwisdom-deactivated202102

JESUS CHRIST

proudtobeinvisiable

This really works.

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