Epic_Leprachaun

current fan creation landscape is kinda like if you went to a party with a homemade cake and everyone takes a slice and silently thumbs up at you with no attempt to start a conversation except for occasionally some guy sits in the corner with a tape recorder critiquing the cake as though he was a restaurant critic and another guy is handing the cake to an uber driver like "yeah i need you to find a restaurant that makes cake like this so i can have more of it" and the only person that's talked to you in 30 minutes is a very sweet little guy who was like "hey i liked your cake" and then ran away apologizing for bothering you the moment you said thank you.

someone brought a cake analysis robot to feed the cake into to determine the exact ingredients and supposedly it can spit out the exact same cake. and if you're like dude. what. then they're like well if it bothers you you should have made more cake. i'm hungry and i deserve cake. and you're like dude we're at a party.

Three months later you find out that fifty people locked themselves in a room to discuss how much they loved your cake and how they wished you made more. None of them ever told you.

so for the love of god. please tell people you liked their cake and don’t feel embarrassed about it. because then they will make more cake.

TIL, that Ronald Reagan’s second wife, Nancy Reagan, supposedly gave him a Delta P blow job that left his pennis “unrecognizable “

I don't know any of you, hitting the reblog button.

every band name can be ranked on the 'is this a thing i would want in my house' scale between the police and the violent femmes

some bands require nuance however. while it would be wonderful to have a lizard wizard in my house my doors are never open to royalty so i do not want to see king gizzard. similarly i would love to have a few gecs in my home maybe a dozen. but 100 is just too many

they might be giants? well. i have to say 'no' just in case they are. bc there wouldn't be enough room. maybe this wouldn't have been a problem if they were more clear about their giant status :|

As someone who works w animals “animals are not mindless automatons, they actually do have feelings and individuality and are capable of feeling acute physical and emotional pain and of forming deep attachments with other animals and people” and “animals are not human infants and have a limited capacity to communicate with humans so you have to familiarize yourself with their boundaries bc if they feel threatened or overstimulated they will fall back on their basic instincts and if you fuck around you are going to find out” are statements that can and should coexist

There was also a woman behind her with WIC checks who looked very stressed about the whole ordeal, so this lady was like, “I can get you ten boxes of cereal for free. Come with me,” and proceeded to do exactly that with her baffling and powerful coupon game. I think this lady was an angel.

hey. don’t cry. crush three cloves of garlic into a pot with a dollop of olive oil and stir until golden then add one can of crushed tomatoes a bit of balsamic vinegar half a tablespoon of brown sugar half a cup of grated parmesan cheese and stir for a few minutes adding a handful of fresh spinach until wilted and mix in pasta of your choice ok?

Bestie it is impossible to ignore the amount of blankets you use at first I assumed this was a meme and those were the layers of the crust of the earth

I actually have 4 more blankets I sometimes add but I didn't want to make my blanket number look excessive

Are you okay

The results are inconclusive on that.

Bestie. the reason you end up sitting up is your lungs think you are being crushed.