still searching for my vorpal sword

If you went to a bar and the bartender was a mousegirl you could ask for a drink and she would balance it on her head and say "for you, it's on the mouse"

the crazy thing about this is that it took one single word to turn it horny. coulda been a normal cute post. coulda taken the high road & conjured a delightful image of a mouse scampering down the bar with a beer ten times its size balanced on its head. but you had to say "mousegirl" and not "mouse." don't pretend this isn't what's going on either i know the score i know what's up. i'm familiar with this sort of semantic trick. you want to fuck down on an anime girl with certain characteristics of a rodent and everyone's gotta know.

in retrospect it's even crazier that the reason "girl" set this guy off was because it tangentially invoked the specter of the japanese

Gimme 1 margarita and I saw off my leg!

every year around late may, without fail, this post starts getting notes again . and my little wet raw chicken breast of a brain gets puzzled. because i forget that summer is , in fact. a yearly event

If you’re abled please reblog it cause like…the more ppl knows the better

Once upon a time a concept tried to suffer and eat a yummy meal at the same time, and it became the first person.

you know who really gets to embody the character type usually assigned to male leads where they enter like, the new world, and are just inexplicably kind of excellent at living in that world, and spend the rest of the narrative gaining lore and power and becoming who they were always meant to be? Elizabeth Swann

im not fucking joking i just found a women want me fish fear me hat on the ground

I feel like when you are born they should predict your top ten worst mistakes and top ten most glorious triumphs. And whenever you hit one of them there should be a sound only you can hear, like the ringing of a bell in another world. And it should be the same sound for both classes of events.