meredith

Also Lisa and I were talking ghosts and Ouija boards and such and she’s like, “You can’t do Bloody Mary in New Orleans. Every place is just stacks and stacks of spirits on top of each other, you may be calling on like 20 different Mary ghosts.”

Had the greatest Uber driver of my life yesterday named Lisa, she was from New Orleans (i knew the second she said “oil spill” regarding an accident on one of the highways last week “earrl spill..”) We got stuck in traffic and just cracked each other up the whole way down to my bike shop. Passed two clear touristy ladies in knee high leather boots and faces full of make-up looking like they were going to melt right there on 6th and Chicon, and all I said was “oh girl…” and Lisa barked, “I WASNT GONNA SAY NOTHING UNLESS YOU DID” and laughed so hard she started to cough.

Speaking of the gym, my friend gave me a beautiful bag of house bras and lined ribbed tanks that no longer fit her since her boobs shrank from weightloss and everything was beginning to gap. I can’t do shit about the width of my back (wind resistant!) even with 50lbs-ish off me over the last year plus, so I said I’d take them and women!!!!! Are just so!!!! Incredible!!!!! Everything smells like a beautiful cedar chest and is so silky and nicely folded and in a pretty sparkly blue bag. After the uh, indelicate, sexual encounter from this weekend (not in a bad or scary or fucked up way just in a “dude it’s all nerve endings and tissues down there, CHILL” way) I feel just so increasingly over men.

As long time readers know, I am the only woman in my gym’s fantasy football league, and John handles pretty much everything, as the commissioner and a micromanager, but the one thing I do for him every year, as the one fucking woman, is create the scheduling poll for the draft date and harangue the dudes to fill it out, like the daughter of five generations (shit, might be more tbh) of teachers that I am. “You can participate in this form of democracy or not, but I’m closing the poll tomorrow.”

Uuuuuuugh now I’ve apologized twice for something I still think I’m the one who needs to be apologized to. These people are insane and I truly hope this is the closing chapter.

Hooked up a guy last night, smart and fun and easy to talk to but not attracted to him in the slightest. Nipple hurts in a way where I’m like “damn, ok, I get why people hate breastfeeding now. TMI, sorry!!!!