Cal

i have access to powers and locations that he cannot access independently; he needs my help to navigate the world i've brought him to

i simply found him outside and abducted him one day

there are many cats in the world, but this one is the best and my most favorite. why? because he was available to abduct that morning and for very little other reason.

i have a much greater understanding of this world than him, but he has unshakable confidence in his ability to figure it out and i find that really cute

the power dynamic is fundamentally unbalanced, but i let him have a little audacity. a little combativeness and sass. as a treat.

some humans are needlessly cruel to cats or take them in for a short time before neglecting or abandoning them. but i have chosen to love and guard this one with my life. because i think he's neat.

“Perhaps you’d like to see my pets. They were ALL … rescues.” 

“And as always, gentlemen, our profits will be … donated.” 

“Perhaps you’d like to see my pets. They were ALL … rescues.” 

“And as always, gentlemen, our profits will be … donated.” 

Two it creates a mess and is really itchy, so we have to plan to do it somewhere where we can clean it up easily and take a bath afterwards and Not! In! Your! Kindergarten! Art! Class!

Three other kids might see how much fun you’re having getting your hair cut and also cut their hair and then be sad about how their hair looks. I know YOU don’t mind (and apparently Malachi is some kind of genius kindergartner barber??) but they might mind how they look, you have to set an example.