Originally, I went in worried the opposite would happen. Growing up, I've been taught that Nigeria, the country, is homophobic. (I was born in America.) But over time, I learned that there's tons of other queer Nigerians; some are out, and some are in the closet š.
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hey can everyone do me a favor and put in the tags why they chose their name? even if you don't go by a chosen name irl, you can put why you chose your online name.
For those who don't know: Ikumi Nakamura is the woman who was senior artist on Bayonetta, and designed the titular character along with Hideki Kamiya. Their greatest moment of bonding was over their insistence that Bayonetta keep her glasses on at all times.
Nakamura cannot go to horny jail. She is the warden.
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I love that four different people on my feed scheduled this joyous person to reblog by 8am on June 1. I look forward to seeing this a dozen more times today.
Does anyone else think that Lucrezia Mongfish has, perhaps, become a parody of herself?
People who knew her 20 years ago-- Klaus, the Jaegermonsters, Prince Aaronev Sturmvoraus, the newly ascendant Rat Queen, etc-- say she was always like this. They testify that they're not surprised she turned out to be the one who devestated Europa with aerial bombardments and horrific Mind-Control Wasps.
And yet.
I can't help but think, she wasn't always like this.
Once upon a time, she was one woman, with one physical body. She was a brilliantly powerful spark, and she wasn't afraid to lie, steal, copy notes, and cheat to get ahead, on top of that.
She had at least 3 powerful men wrapped around her finger-- Agatha got some of that Rizz from her Mom's side, but Lucrezia was actively trying to seduce and manipulate the boys, and play them against each other.
Let's say the Heterodyne Boys were actively doing heroics for about 25ish years, before it all went wrong. Bill would've been in his 40s when he finally got married.
Lucrezia Mongfish would've been in her 40s when she got married. She's still beautiful, still desired, still healthy-- but time marches on, relentlessly.
Pouting at her Daddy to come help his favorite daughter... It just isn't cute anymore.
Castle Heterodyne was no doubt glad that Bill finally brought a wife home, but I'm sure that it ALSO encouraged him & Barry to open the Seraglio for some younger models, if she didn't produce a healthy Heterodyne Heir or five fast enough.
.
Lucrezia Mongfish wanted Eternal Youth. She wanted to be "Forever 21." She wanted that Second Breakthrough, that ascendance that was promised to her when the Geisterdamen called her Goddess.
But she's in her 40's, and she's shipped off Klaus so he won't cause trouble, and Aaronev's hair is thinning and he's looking at a political marriage, and she has the Heterodyne, but Mechanicsburg does not LOVE HER.
She is a Spark, and she is brilliant and ambitious and determined, and she has been studying mind-manilulation and transferance for years. She finds a Muse, in the catacombs of the ancient Heterodynes, and she successfully transfers a mind from machine to flesh, with the personality intact.
I'm sure there were many test-subjects, and many experiments, before she was ready to try it on herself.
I think something went wrong.
.
Lucrezia Mongfish was once a woman with a singular body, with a heartbeat and breath, and appetites for cake, for sex, for power, for love, for adoration, for music, for jewels... She wanted it all.
But she still had to sleep, and hydrate. Take bathroom breaks. Experience boredom, and itches, the relief of removing restrictive garments, the minor pleasures and frustrations of being alive.
Then she made herself into a bodiless ghost, distilled "essence" that could-- in theory-- jump from host to host, or take on MANY bodies., so that she would never have to age, and never have to die.
Something went wrong, of course.
There are fewer compatible hosts than you'd think, out there. Her brilliant machines are delicate, finicky, and the processes were executed imperfectly by her devoted followers.
She wanted to turn back the hands of time. She found herself adrift, trapped outside of it, for untold ages. Stuck in a box, going insane, with nobody to rescue her from her own bad decisions.
She wanted a brand-new body-- but this one is inelegant, that one can't hold a Spark, this one is missing some parts-- like skin, or taste buds, or a foot-- and that one isn't PRETTY ENOUGH!
She's throwing a tantrum. She is the ghost of A Woman With Appetites, but she no longer exists in a body that can crave cake, or sex, or water, or sleep. She has the distorted memory of an emptiness inside, and she must force everyone to love her, to adore her, to OBEY HER EVERY WHIM so that she can feel right again.
She used to hunt cats for fun, on her family estate. Her father taught her to respond to pain by spreading it around. She was spoiled, and played both Wicked Schemer and Damsel In Distress, for longer than she should've gotten away with it.
Was she like Zola? Was she like Sephie?
Who was Lucrezia Mongfish, when she was a young woman with a father, and sisters, and a mother who is never mentioned, friends and frenemies and rivals from University, and dozens of handsome young suitors to choose from?
Who was Lucrezia, when she was no longer quite as young, when she was married, when she was pregnant with her second child, and ready to take the plunge towards Immortality?!
Would she recognize the person, the ghost, the demonic legion, that she has become?
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The most interesting question you can ask about any character is not what do they want. it's what do they believe they deserve. because those two things are almost never the same and the gap between them is where your entire story lives. a person can want love completely and believe they don't deserve it and that belief will destroy every good thing that comes toward them in ways they won't even notice they're doing. write the gap. the gap is the character.
we gotta get back to torrent distribution, i just watched someone eat eight grand in bandwidth charges because they ran a direct-download piracy site with local file hosting through cloudflare. torrents were invented literally for this exact reason
i have a file or folder on my pc that i want to share with other people. let's call it gayshit.mp3
unfortunately gayshit.mp3 is 750mb and im not paying for discord nitro so i need another way to send it
i put it into qbittorrent and it makes a torrent file. this is essentially a very small file that points to gayshit.mp3 so other computers can find it. kinda like a treasure map
i send this tiny file to my friend, who loads it into qbittorrent. their computer takes a moment to find mine over the vast expanse of cyberspace and then (as long as my pc is running and the file is still where it should be), it gets copied from my hard drive to theirs
this is the cool part: if somebody else loads that tiny file, they can download it from both of us. if i'm offline but my friend is on, the third person can still get it. this also means that if two people have separate halves of the file, they can download the other half from each other. as long as some combination of people have the pieces between them, they can all have the whole thing.
crucially this does not require a server!!! you can just upload the file to a few people and as long as they keep it, it's still accessible. as long as somebody, somewhere is still connected, it's available forever. the only way it goes away is if everybody disconnects from it.
HOLY SHIT GUYS, I WAS INSPIRED BY THIS POST TO TRY MAKE THE SONG AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT WHEN I DRAGGED THE TRAINING AUDIO OVER THE BACKING TRACK AND IT LINED UP PERFECTLY
What do you mean āchatā is now referring to ChatGPT and not twitch chat? What? What? What the fuck? No?
When I address chat I am speaking to a presumed Greek chorus of real human people shitposting on their lunch break, not a machine that devours lakes to covert electricity into slop.
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