Please don't step on the scarf.

the goal is to always have days so good that you forget you have a phone

it’s not ‘talking to myself’ it’s called a soliloquy you fuck

#it’s only a soliloquy if it’s in verse #otherwise it’s just a sparkling mental breakdown

it's kind of crazy climate change has occurred at such a remarkable pace that I and everyone else around my age can remember a completely different climate in our childhoods. I truly watched winter gradually disappear in my life.

"You're too young to remember this, but there used to be so many insects outside that you would have to clean them off the windshield after a long car ride" is the kind of sentence that would have been in a cheesy scifi short story earlier in my life, perhaps submitted to a literary magazine and accepted to show support for its environmentalist message - now it's something I've said in earnest.

@copperbadge this seems up your alley

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

oh she is so stupid I love her

however small you may think this dog could be, it is sooo much smaller

i love when my mutuals are mutuals with each other #myecosystem #myenclosure

I misread "mycosystem" and accepted 100%.

we all know the x-files pilot is insane and one of my favorite insane things about it is mulder (understandably) initially being concerned scully is just being sent by the government to spy on him, because you think to yourself, oh surely this will be a longstanding conflict and she will slowly have to earn his confidence, considering that his entire life’s work is built on his fundamental distrust of the authority that sent her. but all she has to do is say “no i swear i’m not you have to believe me :(” and bat her eyelashes and he’s immediately like god you’re so right you would never lie to me i’m going to tell you my entire life story and deepest trauma NOW. they’ve known each other 4 hours btw

quarterly reminder that if i reblog something ai-generated it is 110% and always an accident and for the love of god please tell me so i can delete it from my blog

It's important to note that Chekhov's Gun was not originally about foreshadowing, but a piece of advice to playwrights about how every element in a play should have narrative relevance. The corollary to Chekhov's Gun is that if a gun mounted on the wall in act 1 is never used at all in the entirety of the play, then it should be omitted from the play entirely.

Very funny example of writing advice that is very specific to its medium getting overapplied outside its scope. Can you imagine how awful set design would be if people tried to apply this to movies. 60 minute post credits scene in the Matrix where Neo has to fire every gun that appears in the "lots of guns" scene

Thank you, that was terrifying

people born in 2000 should be like 12-14 now. but they’re not. that’s how fucked up our world is now

The older this post gets the funnier it becomes

My cousin born in 2000 is a licensed psychologist.

that’s how fucked up our world is now