i'm the normalest guy on the planet btw. #normalboy #normalcore #boynormal #normalguythings

people always ask if you have an instagram or snapchat but they never ask if you have an online journal where you broadcast every thought you have. it’s because they want you for your sexy body but not your beautiful mind. and that’s fucked up. they should want both.

your blorbos don't have to be romantic to love each other (#platonic love wins) but also they don't have to love each other to be romantic. ship those characters as a loveless marriage. make their feelings tragically one-sided with no hope of change. put them in a dead end relationship that they both know needs to end but neither are willing to admit it yet. more bad ships forever. its enrichment for me.

I will always care more about the supportive cishet boyfriend at pride than i will about the wannabe cop queer person interrogating every “straight looking” couple to make sure they’re “queer enough” to be there btw. Don’t worry about your cishet boyfriend, he’s sitting with me eating an ice cream wearing a homemade little pride bracelet around his arm and he is the happiest he’s ever been in his life :]

Random stinging pain in my neck 👀

atacked by my #MindWasp

Can you put those things on a leash please

Yeah. a really Long one so they can still get u tho

I'm a 27 year old man and I got hanahaki disease because they fired the clerk I like at the vape store

wow you have dogshit taste (remembers im trying to be nicer to people who like different things) uh i mean, it's beautiful how the breadth of human experience is so wide it encompasses those with good taste and those with dogshit taste

all my hate posts are ethical btw

im realizing very fast that people do not in fact know that sometimes things in stories suck on purpose and it sucking is the point

secretary birds look pretty normal but for some reason people have collectively decided to photograph them like they're [takes a moment to find an acceptable way to say this] women