but i love me some candy @dontmesswithnoheroin - Tumblr Blog

all of the numbers that are divisible by 17 sound so absurd. 51? 68? 85? ridiculous. 102? absolutely not. and don't even get me started on 119

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34 and 136 i can believe, but i feel like i shouldn’t. it’s 102 in a trench coat

red-swimmerz-deactivated2021082

did we just run out of posts to make

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no, i haven't made a post about every number yet

swinginsportscutebasketball

I'm sorry to let you know that 100,000,001 (one hundred million and one) is divisible by 17 and because of that, so is every 16-digit number that is four digits repeated four times e.g. 1234123412341234

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tiktoks-for-dead-pope

iwait4youalexg

Oh!

doh007

Thank you all, i needed further explanation - And i do find it might help me!

chatteringfox

[ID 1: Tweet by brother stone (@ saul_mondriaan) reading: I need to get better at going "oh, these aren't thoughts, you're not figuring anything out, this is just your version of how animals in captivity chew on themselves" /.End ID]

[ID 2: Tumblr tags reading: #one of the otters at the local aquarium sleeps with his tail in his mouth. it's very cute and charming #but when there was a stressful time (introduction to a new otter) he started chomping down on his tail and got an injury #and I think about that as like. The things that become chewing-on-yourself behaviors often start as something you do to self-soothe. #You get more stressed you do the soothing thing more frantically it starts to hurt you and you don't necessarily notice. #If you like to reassure yourself by thinking through outcomes and possibilities. The chomped-down version is a spiral of overthinking. #and you think maybe it isn't calming you down because you haven't thought through everything yet – ! #stop chomping. #this is a good way to put what I've identified as pacing your cage thoughts #your friends don't hate you. you are pacing your cage #you're not boring or stupid. you're gnawing at the bars of your enclosure #something that helped me a lot was a psych lecture that said that thoughts are supposed to be innovative #so if you're going in circles something's wrong /.End ID]

lustcannibalism

the desire to engage in my hobbies leaving my body as soon as I have the day off even though I was looking forward to it all week

akashicrecord

the lesbian computer from portal was right. given the circumstances ive been shockingly nice

ivy-connivy

insane like/reblog parity on this post btw

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redstonedust

love when a character is a scientist and their speciality is science and they do science in a science lab. no specifics no clear goals no clue where their funding comes from. dont even worry about it. science.

hillerska-official

Very hard to scroll tumblr on the bus in the current fandom climate (the hockey players are sucking each others dicks every other post)

t00thpasteface

nothing online is ever truly deleted. except that one fucking thing you're looking for

targetedknowledge

sirkayleeofcamelot

*becomes a knight strictly because the local bard is cute, and I want him to write songs about me*

big-blog-of-cheese-day

*becomes a bard strictly because the local knight is cute and I want to write songs about him*

thyrell

*becomes the village idiot because of a chemical deposit in the well behind my house*

the274

*becomes the evil wizard because the local strong knight is cute and I want to get beaten by them.*

evilwizard

*dumps my evil chemicals in the well behind some random dude’s house*

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ageae

spidersinmysoup

"You snooze you lose" anti nap propaganda, changing it to "you snooze yaaaaayyyyyy yippeeeee"

donotusetheinternet-deactivated

if youve never physically been in the presence of like, a real live wolf, and you probably wont get the chance to, heres some stuff about them you should know

a wolf’s fur is so unbelievably thick that you can get like, your whole hand into it while petting. and then you can keep going

wolves are a lot bigger than you think they are. think about how big you think a wolf is then just like double that

they dont really smell like dog but they DO smell and youre not going to be able to figure out if its a good smell or not

a wolf really wants to lick the inside of your mouth. he will not stop trying to lick the inside of your mouth at any cost, and generally speaking you need to press your lips together kind of tightly when he approaches your face so that he doesnt worm his damn tongue in there to give you what he thinks is an appropriate greeting

a wolf doesnt really want to look at you while you pet him but he wants you to pet him. hes embarrassed

if a grown ass wolf decides to lay down on you, you just have to deal with it and thats your life now

young wolves, much like young dogs, are overwhelmingly goofy and stupid. a teenage wolf will see your very fragile, very human shoulder and go “i can probably step on that with my full weight” and then he will do it

letting a wolf eat out of your hand is actually not remotely frightening, and youll want to do it all day

sad-gay-potato

I wanna know who did this research.

donotusetheinternet-deactivated

well, i did!

meinenaffenhosen

in the interest of science, have tested & can confirm

royalblueghost

When I am elected president I will institute a law saying that anyone with a net worth over 50 million must, at their own expense, employ a Jester. They must feed, clothe, and house the Jester according to the Jesters wishes, may not fire the Jester, and may not retaliate against the Jester, as the Jester will have Jesters Privileges.

One must spend at least three hours per day on the company of your Jester, and allow the Jester access to your quarterly reports.

The Jesters will be chosen by voluntary lottery. Jesters will be regularly interviewed to make sure they have not become Lackeys.

This law will prevent rich folk from being surrounded with vapid yes-men. A lot of problems with the world right now are happening becuse rich and powerful men don’t have anybody on hand to say “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”

sludgebitch

many of the horny posts on here are written as if the author knows of sex more as a theoretical framework than an act one can actually perform

effemimaniac

what's not theoretical is how I made your mum's bed frame work last night

sludgebitch

thank you for fixing her bed frame up. i was worried she wouldn't have a place to sleep since it stopped working. load off my mind. now i can finally spare the time to have sex with your mother

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mushroominaforest

Shout out to the doctor who responded with complete sincerity when I (on anesthesia) uttered the phrase “chat are we cooked” in her medical professional vicinity. You’re such a real one for that fr fr

satyriconmp3

utilising the gift of imagination to hallucinate moments of tenderness between fictional people

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but i love me some candy