Benevolent creature

clownfish be like "i know a spot" and take you to a fucking deadly sea organism

This post would’ve been a lot better if you didn’t say the f word. Grow up.

i miss vhs tapes and cds i miss feeding my computers and tvs yummy treats. now theyre eating nothing. theyre being born without mouths

Baba yaga mixtape

walks out of a bar covered in kisses and I say "you should see the other guy" and you look in the bar and he's dead in a pool of blood

omg if you feel like it you can always ask me random questions. i will answer all, this is literally the most fun thing ever (and i’m nice i promise)

Eventually on my blog , give it a few more days...

Hello, yes, do this to me please, ask me random questions, it's okay!

Halfway through your trip your uber driver says “fuck this actually” aloud and teleports the whole car back to your original location and makes you get out.

Your uber driver keeps quicksaving at every red light and stop sign.

There’s no traffic, not a single other car in sight. Then suddenly your driver looks in the rear view mirror. There’s a car the opposite color with a license plate with the same text in reverse order driving directly behind y’all. Boss music starts to play and there’s a sizable health bar.

Your uber driver is speeding along, drafting, drifting, using shortcuts, driving up those trucks with the ramps; you get to your destination 2 minutes faster than you expected. Your driver takes y’all back to the start, they know they can do that again. Faster this time.

You’re stuck in traffic for a while. Your uber driver groans in frustration then starts doing a series of gestures, turning the wheel back and forth, manipulating the shift gear, tapping the gas and brakes. You get a notification on your phone that cheats have been enabled and you won’t get any achievements until they’re disabled. Your driver moves the car and upon touching another car it explodes instantly without dealing any damage to y’all.

No, she’s a bitch is what she is

what do u mean???? it was clearly an accident she even said “Oooppsss”

LMFAOOOO

Look, rather than being petty and destroying it, why not talk to the girl. Really ask them why they are using the confederate flag. But no, low level terrorism is the answer.

LOW LEVEL TERRORISM?

Low level terrorism

ICONIC

world heritage post

Morally correct

Just a reminder that tweet has lasted longer than the confederacy