•small talk•

hope your pets stay healthy in 2017

I almost didn’t blog this and felt guilty

Not risking it

hope ya pets even healthier in 2018

hope your pets discover immortality in 2019

I could seriously use this money right now….

Please give me my refund of 400$ soon…

I feel obligated to reblog this every time it shows up in my dash

So I reblogged this exactly a week ago because I thought it was funny and uh lo and behold, a family friend wrote me a big ol’ check just to help me out of a tough financial spot AND my bank refunded me $32 for fees they’d originally taken out. SO UH YEAH. Reblogging this again in hopes that it brings equally good fortune to my followers.

Sure why not? Jobs bring in money and prosperity…

DID I JUST GET FUCKING KISSED BY thE MOST ADORABLE FUCKING POKEMON IN EXISTENCe?

If you don’t have a Pikachu kissing you on your blog, then what blog are you running?

Not a very good one obviously.

me: *spills my feelings* my brain: *slamming fists on table* REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGRET REGR

[Person: Lookit this fucker. Cat: *muffled meowing* Person: He’s got a cat door - *clicks light* - that he can come in. But nope! He wants to come in the door! Cat: *muffled meow* Person: You wanna come in the door? Y'wanna come in? Alright, watch this - *door squeaks open* WELCOME to the house, Joe! Come on in– Cat: *runs away, jingling* Person: You FUCKER!!]

if anyone wants to come into my life and not fuck me over hmu

My bra size should be C-4 cause these are some bomb ass titties

if ur gonna date me u gotta be comfortable with a lot of casual silence bc i just never fucking talk

I swing wildly between never shutting the hell up and turning into a stump

living in europe and hearing about the usa elections thru social medias is wild cause you get to know the candidates only via memes. so you got Cool Granpa, Unhip Lady, racist piece of corn and. a serial killer?

Stars are actually much bigger than moon.

so is my massive dong

if i were anakin i wouldve made c3po rose gold or maybe silver tbh… his current color makes him look like a walking trumpet