theo ♡

This is the funniest thing I've seen all day.

Some of the men yall tag as dilfs are SHAMEFUL. I was looking for dilf memes (it is not important why) and all I see is a parade of rosy-cheeked unblemished dandy men. Slapping a beard on a 26 year old in a suit is not a dilf, you are besmirching the title. There is a recipe, a Dilf Recipe. You do not need all these ingredients but you must have AT LEAST three: a child/ward/apprentice of some sort, crows feet, laugh lines/frown lines, sun damage, gray hairs, dark circles, Depression, intriguing battle scars/injuries/missing limb, Divorced, body hair, a look in the eyes that screams for A Moment of Relief, etc etc. Like the bar is low. Ben Barnes is not a Dilf. Harry Styles with 5 o’clock shadow is not a dilf. TIMMY CHARDONNAY IS NOT A DILF. You are all WEAK your blood is WEAK put that man BACK IN THE OVEN UNTIL HES DONE THESE DUDES ARENT AL DENTE THEY ARE CRUNCHY AND DUNKED IN WATER PUT THEM BACK LET THEM COOK

its so weird how many twitter and instagram accounts are just like. reposts of my treasured mutuals here on tumblr dot com to their 10k followers accumulated for Literally Just Stolen Jokes its not that deep and whatever but CMON its such a weirdly specific flavor of clout chasing......if you enjoy the circus then put on your goddamn size 32 polka dotted shoes and get in here. you are not too good to clown around!! stop selling bootleg tickets to the carnival!!!!!

Worse that being Rick rolled -0/10

you are literally on the destiel site AND i said have a good day in the tags can i at LEAST get 1/10

Yeah that’s fair, 1/10 - experience was terrible but the server was nice

Reblog and put in the tags if Bo Burnham was one of your top artists on Spotify this year 

this was 2007 so there’s a 90% chance that “gosh!” is a napoleon dynamite reference which makes this review an outright hate crime

It’s called consent, baby.

[image: in a store section dedicated to feeding birds, on the shelf above several packages of “6 fat balls”, a price sticker covers part of the text along the shelf edge. the visible part of the sentence reads “Please ask for ass”.]

The fact that cDream burned trigger phrases into something like a disc that means so much to cTommy is so fucking vile actually like pure fucking evil, like- he did that with the intention of triggering

That he turned something that he knows Tommy goes to for comfort into something that Tommy actively has to fear,, it doesn’t really get worse than that

this next cup of coffee will fix me

im worse now