devilishpudding

Suddenly, this man standing on the outskirts of our conversational circle piped up with “actually, I think men are more discriminated against than women these days.”

 All conversation died.

I turned to look at him and he had this smug, insufferable grin on his face, relishing this moment, expecting us to waste our time and energy refuting this ridiculous thing he had just said.

The Devil’s Advocate was among us.

And, in my mind, I saw the next 15+ minutes playing out. The parade of facts and statistics in a vain attempt to defend ourselves, our gender, and to prove that misogyny is real. The glib, snide denials from some shithead who is getting off on our pain and frustration. The Gish Gallop of bullshit that would take a whole evening to properly dismantle. It was depressing and overwhelming. I hated it. I had to kill it before it began.

So I looked him dead in the eye and I said “OK,“ shrugged, and just walked away. 

Nothing I have ever said to another human being has ever been so crushing. As I walked away, I watched the smug grin vanish and confusion and anxiety set in. The rest of the group turned their backs to him and carried on as if he had never spoken - as if he was invisible. He was still staring at me when I walked over to another friend and told her what he had said. I pointed him out for her and made direct eye contact with him while we both laughed.

Watch: “Flying While Fat” is the short documentary on YouTube you NEED to watch showing what plus size people go through when they travel by air

If the plane doesn’t physically accommodate your body type, flying can turn from an uncomfortable experience into a humiliating one. That’s why London-based artist Stacy Bias made the new documentary Flying While Fat: to get to the heart of just how pervasive people’s fat phobia on planes is.

Gifs: Stacy Bias

“oh, so i’m a horrible person? i’m a bad friend? is that what you’re saying? maybe i should just leave you alone for good since everything i do seems to upset you.”

“i’m so fucking sorry, i’m sorry, oh my god, i don’t deserve to be alive, all i ever do is screw up and hurt people, i’m a terrible person, please don’t hate me - ”

“why does it make you uncomfortable? that seems like a weird thing to be uncomfortable about. please explain in minute detail and don’t forget to excavate the entirety of your tragic backstory so i can decide if it’s bad enough to justify your discomfort.”

“i mean, sure, but free speech - “ 

“okay, thank you for telling me. i may not fully understand why this thing is upsetting for you, but i will stop doing it because i care about your feelings.“ 

here here here (there’s more sites saying the same thing)

it’s called PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder) and it’s basically PMS but make it Super Hardcore, it’s a hormonal disorder and to my knowledge they’re not exactly sure what causes it - there’s theories tho - but there seems to be little research on it anyway. As I said it’s similar to PMS in terms of symptoms [mood swings, lethargy, cramps, changed sleeping pattern, libido, appetite] but the symptoms get so severe that they are interfering with your daily life and impacting it negatively. Especially in terms of psychological symptoms, while it doesn’t go that far for everyone who has it and also not every month, a lot of the people who experience it are sent into a severe depressive episode beause of it and it’s really not rare at all for them to experience legitimate suicidal thoughts that go away the second they get their period (or up to two days in from what I’ve read).

I’ve read different claims on how many people it affects, some sources say 5%, others 8%, others say 2% so I don’t know about that, but menstruating people need to know this lmao. Not knowing that your suicidality is caused by a literal physical disorder that you have can be so dangerous, especially when you already struggle with such issues anyway or are trying to recover from mental illness and don’t realize that your “relapses” are symptoms of an actual disorder.

if you think you might have PMDD, i highly recommend finding a way to get rid of your period or at least reduce how often it comes. i know that birth control can actually exacerbate depression in many people so do your research and be aware of that, but for me birth control was my method of stopping my period before i started T and it was great – because you can skip the week of sugar pills that makes your period come and just. not have a period.