Come on babe, why don’t we paint the town
…and all that jazz
trying on a metaphor
🪼
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
cherry valley forever
h
Mike Driver
sheepfilms

shark vs the universe
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
DEAR READER
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
we're not kids anymore.

izzy's playlists!

titsay
$LAYYYTER
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@lavender-lily
Come on babe, why don’t we paint the town
…and all that jazz

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bitches be sucking farts there
Found the source of the infographic that explains how the results were obtained!
there’s sixteen Colorado counties that their most searched was “wolf furry”, plus thirty-odd counties (not counting either Arapahoe or any of the ones marked here as “Insufficient Data”) which may well have had plenty of searches for “wolf furry”, just fewer than for whatever they’re labeled here
and “skunk furry” searches in Arapahoe County outnumbered “wolf furry” searches in the entire state of Colorado
something tells me Skunks Georg
we did it, we created furry gerrymandering

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The worst types of cookbook:
The Ottolenghi - it is vital that you use 1g of this very expensive ingredient. It comes from a 500g bag with a one-week shelf life.
The time machine - 15-minute recipe! First, leave to marinate overnight...
The dishwasher - one-pot recipe! Now decant your ingredients and wipe out your pot. And again. And again. And again.
The optimist - cook the onions until caramelised (2 minutes).
The kindergarten teacher - get one nommable little tree of broccoli and bosh that into boiling water. Delish!
The brand names only - ingredients: Ritz crackers, Philadelphia cheese, Cool Whip, orange Jell-o...
The 1950s palate - use one (1) clove of garlic and a small pinch of chili flakes (omit if preferred).
The why bother with a cookbook - to make beans on toast, gently heat a tin of beans and put on top of freshly buttered toast.
there are much bigger things to worry about but sometimes i hear myself talking and i'm like "damn this asshole thinks they're right about everything..." and i know i should tone it down but the problem is that i am frequently right and other people do have worse opinions and taste than i do
“I asked ChatGPT —”
Okay well I asked the picture of Michael Jackson in my pocket and he told me to get the fries with my burger soooo
I absolutely adore dogs but I think dog haters are (usually) more justified than cat haters wrt their reasoning
your average cat hater: I don't like how they r bitchy and ignore me/ won't let me manhandle them
your average dog hater: I have been mortally endangered by an ill-trained dog

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Why are the ads trying to convince me that various celebrities lost weight by pouring baking soda directly into their mouths? It wasn’t ozempic, it was making baking soda volcanos in giant beer tankards full of apple cider vinegar. Ohhhhhh of course, how silly of me.
a squirrel or perhaps a cardinal posted this
How about you mind your own damn business
@animals-with-fan-art okay so…quick question. Does it count if the animal was only implied?
This absolutely counts
bad news for chocolate lovers: amid massive corporate downsizing, Lindt has had to euthanize 2,000 of its handsome european chocolate chefs . an additional 1,300 will be thrown out in the cold with nothing but their stupid Fucking whisks

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Goths aren't "true to seed" in the sense that the biological offspring of two goths do not necessarily grow up to be goth, though inheriting the inclination for it from both parents increases the odds significantly. That is not how goths naturally reproduce.
The process is actually quite sophisticated, and requires the presence of a full-grown goth to trigger it. A pupal-stage proto-goth, at this point completely indistinguishable from any other small human child, only needs to encounter a mature specimen once - and while the initial imprinting that ensues will only take seconds, the incubation period often takes more than a decade, even several.
The first visible step of the transformation is triggered when the dormant goth suddenly gains awareness that they have free will and can do whatever they want with their appearance. While the progress may be gradual, or seem like the transformation happened all at once overnight, the initial seed was planted years ago. And now, in full bloom, a fully-fledged mature adult goth may finally be happy.
And that's why it's important to sometimes look goth as fuck in the grocery store. You might be seen by small child who had previously hoped to die before adulthood because everything they've heard about becoming a grownup is just pure misery, who will then consequently think to themselves "actually nevermind, that's what I want to be when I grow up."
One of the many benefits of being weird in public is possibly saving -- and definitely improving -- a stranger's life without ever knowing.
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Season 5 Episode 06: “Trials and Tribble-ations”
This might genuinely be the most endearingly self-indulgent episode of television in history.