So many shitposts, So little time

maidens if you are going to flee dramatically from my castle in the middle of the night once i reveal my true nature to you please leave your candelabra on the little ledge by the portcullis we are running out of them

starting to think these maidens are stumbling in soaked through from the rain just to steal my beautiful gowns and homewear are any of you actually lost

At the checkout in Home Goods loading the belt with nothing but candelabras in all shapes & sizes while the cashier watches sympathetically and asks if it’s the maidens again

we simply have to hold on to the belief that we will live to see a world in which every driver on the road knows how to execute a zipper merge

this may be my age showing but I am a passionate supporter of wires. earbuds? put a leash on those things. wireless keyboard? no, it needs to hold hands with the computer. the ps5 controller I forgot to charge has the staying power of a wealthy nonagenarian with a much younger wife and 14 life insurance policies, but the controller plugged into my pc? that baby will outlive my bloodline. my ethernet cable is like a son to me.

if you’re a bard you should be able to challenge Raphael for the Orphic hammer Devil Went Down to Georgia style

slamming your knights visor down when you’re finished talking to them, like slamming the phone back on the receiver.

Turning around to leave only to turn back and lift the visor up for one last remark before slamming it down again.

Everyone shut up I'm thinking about how Daniel Craig earnestly and believably portrays a queer man with religious trauma who gradually figures out that there are people that don't use belief as a weapon.

whatever 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

I did my PhD in a fish lab, and one time I was emailing a fish company, and the guy emailed me back with the signature “Best fishes,” followed by these guys

bbc merlin has a lot of faults but i do think the way they blithely ignored the existence of christianity was very funny of them

It's truly fucking hilarious that it's a show about a banned "old religion" that never once mentions the new religion. Iconic behaviour. Maybe they're all atheists in Camelot and you cannot prove me wrong.

i am afraid of people who reblog things with no tags. not even any identifiers like the show it’s from or anything. just silence. what are you thinking?? hello??

"don't assign human morality to non human things" is so true except when it comes to printers. they know what they are, they understand dilemmas and ethics and morality. they choose to be how they are, they choose to be evil, at their very core they are rotten