I think this is my favorite post on the Internet right about now! Edit: And I just needed to Edit this Photo 4 TIMES till it worked here⦠#youarewelcome #tumblrnoob #learnhowtotumblr
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I think this is my favorite post on the Internet right about now! Edit: And I just needed to Edit this Photo 4 TIMES till it worked here⦠#youarewelcome #tumblrnoob #learnhowtotumblr
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Thank you, anon, for gifting me yet more checkmarks. I'd return the favor but you wisely hid yourself :P
The rainbow is complete. You can stop now.
Tumblr really chose violence with this one.
Cooking With Tumblr: "Why Are We Here? Just to Suffer?" Edition
Tumblr, I come to you as a woman on the verge of fulfilling her destiny. Thanks to a viral poll by @relientk, the newest meme on Tumblr is vanilla extract, specifically the act of using too much of it. Pure vanilla extract is, of course, expensive and also strong in small amounts. Who among us has that much vanilla extract on hand and is foolish enough to attempt this?
Me.
For personal reasons, I have a lot of vanilla extract in my apartment. It was here before the meme, and it will be here after. I had all the ingredients for the horrible poll cake except for milk, so I went out and bought some milk. It is three in the morning and very cold outside. Why am I doing this now instead of waiting for the poll to finish? Two reasons: the first being how fickle the internet in burning through memes, and the second being that five days gives my better judgement enough time to convince me not to do this.
Will God stop my sinful hands before the cake makes it into the oven? Let's find out!
Mise en Place
Here are all the ingredients in their Tumblr-approved quantities. No, your eyes are not deceiving you! That is indeed a teacup of vanilla extract. I laid everything out in twee little teacups to try and lessen the blow of this culinary affront to man about to occur in my kitchen. The baking powder is in a souvenir shot glass because I ran out of twee little teacups.
The exact measurements come courtesy of @princessmuk, who carefully adjusted a white cake recipe (LINKED HERE!) to the proportions of the poll. The percentages at the time she wrote her addition (left) are only negligibly different from the percentages now (right), so there's no need to adjust.
I've cut the her quantities in half because even I have limits, but the cooking time, temperature and everything else will match the recipe she based her post on.
Okay.
Tumblr, I'll be frank with you. This does not look, feel or smell like cake batter. For those who didn't read princessmuk's post, I'd like to inform you that the source recipe is called "Simple White Cake". This is not white, and nothing about this can be called "simple".
That said, I've put it in a buttered and floured cake pan and am baking it for at least 40 minutes in a 350 degree oven. I don't know off the top of my head how the poll will affect the cook time because I'm very tired, but I will be checking the internal temperature just in case. Now, all there is to do is wait!
The Moment of Truth
My entire apartment smells like vanilla. It's not unpleasant, but it is definitely apparent. After fifty minutes, I opened the oven and found what appeared to be a firm enough cake. After cooling it in the refrigerator, I removed it from the pan and laid it on a plate.
Physically? It doesn't seem that bad. There's a distinctly crispy-looking crust around the rim. While it's certainly denser than most cakes, it springs back when pressed and feels fully cooked. My kitchen thermometer read an internal temperature of just over 200 degrees Fahrenheit or 93 degrees Celsius. Many had predicted it would become an amorphous, soupy sludge due to having nearly twice as much liquid as necessary, but the batter was still thick enough to form a cohesive solid mass.
But how does it taste? Without further ado:
Find, rate and share the best memes and images. Discover the magic of the Internet at Imgur.
Tumblr won't let me insert the video directly, because of course it won't. I should also preface this by saying that this is the first and only instance of my face and voice on the internet, so if you misgender me I will force-feed you the rest of the cake.
With that out of the way: it's honestly not that bad??? Is it good? No. Of course it isn't. It's a cake with several dozen times' more vanilla extract than required. But is it inedible? I honestly can't say that it is. I should point out for those uninformed that vanilla extract is a tincture, meaning that the active ingredient is dissolved into alcohol. In this case, 35% alcohol, the low average alcohol content of gin and dark rum. Minors have actually gotten drunk by drinking vanilla extract. That overwhelming bitterness you associate with the ingredient? Part of that is the vanilla itself, but most of it is the alcohol that typically evaporates away in the oven. Because of that, the cake is bitter but not overpowering.
The texture alone is actually quite pleasant. Its texture is best compared to that of banana bread, with a rich, heavy moistness and a slight chew along the rim. Its thin shape and density makes it ideal to be eaten by hand. I personally enjoy bitterness to the point where I'd seriously consider this palatable if the sugar content was at least doubled. It wouldn't be better than a regular piece of cake, but it would be good.
To those that feel disappointed, I express my sincerest apologies. Even I was legitimately hoping for some sort of Cake From the Black Lagoon that would explode in the oven and taste like paint thinner. To remedy any disillusionment, I will end this culinary journey in hubris with a poll. Thank you.
Do you believe me?
Yes. You are God's bravest little soldier.
No. Your taste buds should be repossessed.
Vanilla extract

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How old is this and why is it on my dash
i made this in 2018
I admire your dedication to period accurate historical recreation
Thinking about Bruceβs eating dome
Reasons I like subtitles:
1. I can see how peopleβs names and the cities and the countries are spelled.
2. I donβt miss any words, so everything they say makes sense.
3. I get to know what background noises and conversations are.
4. The descriptions of the noises people make are freaking awesome. Ex: splutter, grunt, chuckles.
5. I can see who says what.
6. I donβt have to have the volume super loud so I can hear the dialogue, and I donβt blow my eardrums out because the ambient noises and music is SO FREAKING LOUD.
I freaking love subtitles.

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We need an adult conversation about transit.
- @dayvan
why does my caladium act like she is starving for light. hang on
every day i ahve to reposition the damn lamp cuz sheβs dead set on sticking her first leaf Right The Fuck In There and i donβt want her to burn. but every day i come home from work and she has closed the distance anyway. bestie PLEASE cooperate with me
i finally caved and moved her to the windowsill but this has clearly not satisfied her because she still presses that leaf RIGHT up against the glass
apparently instead of actually growing new leaves in order to increase her light intake sheβs decided that these are PERFECT conditions to flower in
BABYGIRL YOU HAVE ONE LEAF PLEASE
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where did my basket go
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tee hee
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giggle
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hmmm yummy treats
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I love baskets
30 k notes
Getting stuck in a Groundhog Day scenario would fix me
Weβre in one called Samsara

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is it just me or did they yassify the quaker oats guy
STOP MAKING ME FEEL OLD
Okay, but this is genuinely adorable. I love how the first kid, after entering the number, was like βwhat do I do now?β. I bet the kid was trying to figure out where the βcallβ button was, because if youβre only used to cell phones, itβs not really intuitive that the call will automatically go through once you finish entering the phone number
These days, the concept of a dial tone is rather obsolete for a cellphone-centric world, so it isn't a surprise these girls are young enough to be unfamiliar with it or the hookswitch. Only place you see traditional telephones are in office buildings and older homes that still use it. When dial service was introduced, the Bell System had to put together instructional films to educate telephone users. So many people were used to being able to pick up and tell the operator who to call for them, so you had to suddenly learn where to find phone numbers. They didn't even have pushbuttons telephones yet, just rotary dial.
I once had to teach a year 9 class about how telecommunications worked and it included a demonstration of both a can-and-string phone and a landline phone.
When we finished with the landline phone I went "now hang it up" and a number of them went "that's why we call it "hanging up" the phone?!"