I make (incorrect) reasonings for the Lan Clan’s rules based on Lan Wanji’s actions/reactions to breaking them:
-No Alcohol: Every member of the Lan clan is a lightweight. A “get drunk off of half a shot” level lightweight. Last time they all drank together at fourth uncle’s wedding, the Cultivation world woke up to find a mountain missing. No Lan remembers what happened that night. The mountain has yet to be found.
-No Meat: Last time someone killed an animal in the Cloud Recesses, the sect leader cried for four days straight and had to go into seclusion for the next year to save face.
-Always have good posture: It’s the only thing that helps the congenital scoliosis. Back pain from carrying the team is very common for Lans, the good posture helps. And it makes them look taller, useful for scaring away predators such as party conversationalists.
-Never remove the forehead ribbon: It covers up the Lans’ ridiculously large foreheads. Only one’s destined love or a family member with an equally large forehead could accept a forehead the size of the f*cking sky (that’s why there’s clouds embroidered on the ribbon).
-Don’t go in the restricted section of the library: that’s where they keep the forbidden dark magics capable of destroying the cultivation world. And also the p*rn.
-No licentious acts: the last time a licentious act was allowed, a Lan sect leader ended up emptying the entire treasury and covering up a murder for a woman she just met. Lans, They’re like swans, they mate for life and will happily stick their necks in a guillotine if it would make their besotted smile one (1) time. It’s important to lock that partner down before any flirting is allowed. This is for the Lan’s own good.
-No talking while eating: Misophonia. Mealtime is to be tolerated, not prolonged with unnecessary chatting.
-Venturing out past curfew is prohibited: The Lans’ natural habitat is the Cloud recesses. Their startling white coats evolved for camouflaging themselves in the mists. Only strong Lans are permitted to venture out of the nest for night hunting, as their coat color makes them easy-to-spot targets for larger predators.
-Diet preferences: spicy and complex foods usually come with bright colors and sauces. Much easier to avoid staining the white robes when you’re only eating tofu, white rice, and vegetables.
-Causing noise is prohibited: Ever see those little signs at aquariums that say “don’t tap the glass”? You’ll scare the fish.
-Don’t sneer, shout, grieve excessively, anger excessively, or joy excessively: Too many facial expressions would cause wrinkles. They must maintain their smooth, jade-like faces.
-Obey your elders: The Lans have been crafting increasingly more powerful models of Lan with each new generation. If this rule was not programmed into the Youths, there would be nothing to stop them from total dominion.
-Do not neglect young ones: Especially young Juvenile Lans are very small and squishy (see A-Yuan). With their bright white coat colors, they resemble rabbits or dumplings. If neglected, they will be taken by hawks.
-Do not lie: with all the aforementioned emotional restraint practice, it would be VERY easy to lie convincingly. All the Lan’s generational wealth comes from the actions of one Lan, for whom the “no gambling” rule was invented.
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dededos
