Why Not Pretend?

where's that picture that ruined my life

No death cab for ugly? Ugly has to walk?

Until death, all defeat is psychological.

time is a flat iron and brother i’m getting smooth as fuck

time is a curling iron and brother i'm all twisted up

Time is a flat iron, smooth as fuck Time is a curler, twisted up Time is an updo, pinned and tucked Time is a weave-in, stitched and stuck Time is organic, shaped by luck Time is a construct Monster truck

no one is coming to save you its true its true someone might be coming to hang outttttttttt though. someday

"Mario Mario" is an anachronism. He and his brother were only ever referred to by mononyms in their lifetime, like most residents of the Mushroom Kingdom at the time - multi-part names were typically reserved for members of the Toadstool dynasty, and even these were more like titles or Roman cognomina than what we would call a surname today. His putative ennoblement as founder of the "House of Mario" came centuries later as the collapsing feudal order sought additional sources of legitimacy

#mushroom kingdom folklore says that he sleeps beneath a warp pipe to arise in the time of the kingdom's greatest need #he's definitely shown up a few times but it's hard to tell if he has risen from the dead or is just in the middle of some time travel shit #historians hate him.

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person

so ummm welcome to my jar:) lemme show you around! theres some holes poked in the top so i can breathe, theres some leaves to munch on, and ive even got a twig! #mytwig

happy one year of this post. and from the bottom of my heart. i did not know what i wrought

if christopher nolan was really the visionary and ground-breaking director everyone claims he is he would have cast ben affleck as penelope

👋 friendly reminder to use more inclusive and respectful language! 💐 Instead of “disemboweled”, try “differently-emboweled” ☺️

twilight princess funniest zelda game ever made

one of the reoccurring minor plots is that a 3 year old with the mental capacity of an adult is trying to abolish capitalism in the big city. there's a yeti couple living in an abandoned mansion and the guy yeti is like 10 times the size of and more visibly monstrous than the girl yet they made him a malewife. you can collect insects for a little girl that is insane about them and gives you strange and off-putting dialogue about each bug everytime you give her one and practically threatens you if you try to leave her home without giving her bugs she doesn't have yet. one of the modes of transportation in this game is being shot out of a giant canon by a depressed clown and landing on your feet with no injuries. there's a spaghetti western style minigame where the objective is to talk to 20 different cats. a chicken attempts to flirt with link. they made tingle into a sexyman caricature.

Every time someone says that Twilight Princess is too grimdark and serious, I want to point them to this post. It’s a very silly game.