DrawStringPants

in a shocking turn of events repressing your emotions doesn't make them disappear

are you uncomfortable from your hands being dry? if you apply lotion, you can instead be uncomfortable with how greasy they are now. Subscribe for more tips!

Regina, texting: Just got to Costco. Where are you? Zelena: Liquor aisle. Bring another cart.

Being a flop changed my life. The world is not my oyster, I am glowing. I walked into a pole this morning. There's very little I wouldn't do for $1,000

a baby at work the other day gave me the meanest look i've ever seen as it got lifted out of a cesarean. 1 second old and already hating. you can't teach that.

“HOW WAS YOUR DAY RAT BASTARD?” 

top five most important things you can give a character. 1. bisexuality. 2. autism. 3. so much negative rizz it loops around into irresistibility. 4. so many bad events. 5. a coping mechanism that’s cute and silly provided you don’t think about it too hard

does anyone wanna hold hands until we feel a little braver

the reblog map is all of us holding hands btw

when i die make sure to let my computer see my body so it knows what happened to me and doesn't think i abandoned it.