wits and blades, always sharp

imagining a universe where porn is a marketable genre so you have to deal with raycon ads while trying to jerk your shit

You’re an easy slut, aren’t you kitten? Almost as easy as dinner with Hellofresh

I was too scared to watch edward scissorhands has a kid but I thought about how could a woman go through pregnancy with a fetus growing metal scissors hands it took years of theorizing, still without watching the movie, to even think that maybe he wasn’t born with scissor hands

maybe women are stronger than you think

Sorry listening and learning here

i know i’ve talked about this before but it’s really insane when you were passively suicidal for two decades and out of the blue you catch yourself saying shit like “i’ve been trying to eat a lot of fibre because i don’t want to risk colorectal cancer in my 40s” like okay … 40s are part of the plan now?

personally my first guess as to how joker got his scars would be from smiling too big. but maybe that's my dreamer's heart

dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats

if you're washed chopped and cooked then you might be vegetables

[one single bloodcurdling agonized scream] ok time to lock in