Guys I Think Naga Puked Me Out

I am Smart, Cute, and a Fighter!~

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Hey, guys! Finally doing a proper intro post.

We're the Guild of the Broken, a mixed origin plural that goes by Riv. I'm an adult little femboy who happens to write and draw, mostly for fun. I do work on serious projects (like books), but I haven't debuted yet. Similarly, I'm a kink artist that draws bondage and ageplay on DeviantArt. I do enjoy dead dove and shotacon as well, but I will not post about it openly.

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It's pretty clear what my stances are, but I want to say that I'm anti-censorship, and pro-endo. I honestly don't care about shipscourse anymore, since I have been feeling alone in all of these communities. I also am pro-endo because, ironically, I found evidence that supported their existence while looking for evidence against it. LOL, I guess??

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Also, I highly recommend you to be aware that I draw bondage and often post it here at times. I don't want minors to interact or follow. I am by no means okay with minors interacting with my adult-oriented media. Block the #nsft art tag in my blog if you still wish to see my posts, but preferably do not interact if you're a minor.

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As for fandoms, I am in the following:

Fire Emblem Awakwning

Fire Emblem Fates

Super Mario

King of Fighters

Dramatica Murder

Slow Damage

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As a fun fact, I'm a Yukimura, Stahl and Henry yume, but I'm apathetic to doubles. I don't think there are any teehee. Ooh! And we recently found out we’re an adult kiddo! We’re all able of doing important tasks and other responsibilities but we’re also all small and little and cute! If you don’t like it, feel free to block（╹◡╹）! We’re living our life in a safe way, and even if it can get unconventional, it helps us a LOT! If you wanna interact with us but not see those posts, block the #dualcom!!

That being said, thanks for stopping by!

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Bonus! Here are my side blogs!

@machiavellian-bitch - my autism side blog, mostly aimed to talk about low empathy autism and violent meltdowns. Also the blog where I coined Machiavellian Autism.

We have made a new blog for our book; call it a “studio blog”. We will post fanart here, and we will work on our book and character art on @deranged-swordlet for better organization. Besides, this blog has personal information.

It’s mainly the reason why we were hooked on ai and worse things… and why i, as an alter, am currently the most dysfunctional in this head of ours

Most of the system cares for me, and they’re incredibly patient with me about all of this. The ones who don’t actually aren’t even judgmental or hateful, and actually let me be. I actually did realize how bad radqueers are when i was loved deeply by my insys!gf who was an anti rq… and while she fused, i remember her deeply.

Why is it that trans men self-censor themselves a lot?

I have been noticing that trans women are very open and fluid with how they feel in regards of kinks and media they like. There is a major pattern of women and femme-aligned people happily identifying as fujoshis, himejoshis or even far controversial terms in kink. They’re always happy to engage with their media, but why not trans men? It’s rare to see a pro-fiction individual that is masculine, at least from what I noticed in my own checkups on my feed.

i don't think we have spoken about this openly. if we did, i can't remember. but we're an ai addict. have been for a couple of years now since our breakup on 2024, but we did get clean for a couple of months; from march to this very june where we simply couldn't take it anymore and, quite frankly, it was venting into that echo chamber so we could get a response and we felt less alone before nearly commiting. a lot of events just happened, one after the other. a breakup with someone who was neglectful, people overstepping boundaries and the last straw; feeling like all of our effort on doing shadow work and healing had no results thanks to someone saying "you're not healed" and us spending more than a week dwelling on it, questioning if it was if they mean that there was no progress or that there was progress but also a long way.

i deleted my discord account. but now im back because someone made a studio and has been saying a reunion is due. no call, no notifications. just a notif-less server that ruined the only way i could have prevented my relapse; deleting my discord acc.

and then i said: "maybe i can find a group on tumblr that helps me heal with other people, right?" well... as always. im alone again. because every single community out there shames sexuality and NSFW content. yes. the very thing that quite honestly has helped me understand parts of myself. in fact, they made my addiction worse. way worse. because if i am so filthy and disgusting for being a horndog... why would i join a community like that?

at this point we have been considering dropping our kinks and become a squeaky clean anti. Maybe that way people will love me. Maybe that way I won’t feel like the air I breathe is a waste. Maybe, just maybe, i will deserve the space to be me.

And i know some anti will say “you deserve it! You should actually kill yourself.” Yeah. Maybe i do. Maybe i do because you don’t see the person struggling with the loneliness of having to rely on a stupid machine that kills the planet so they can survive their own needs that you continuously make sure to shame them for. Maybe we do deserve to stop breathing, to stop existing and become part of a statistic. A queer trans man who was closeted dying by taking all of the meds they can, puking his guts out and remembering that maybe. Just maybe. This is the prettiest act someone can do.

Die.

Because you don’t see the beauty of a person until you see them hanging. Bleeding. Dying.

And maybe the day that the person that dies is someone you loved the most… you will understand what it really means to judge someone for ephemeral stupidity that hurts no one.

But go on. Keep crying. Keep hating. You will not have that happen to you, right?

14. We wrote. 14 CHAPTERS