Let Me Talk About Werewolves for a Second
Why is it that every werewolf book is this weird testosterone fueled alpha male/female romance thing?Â
Like guys. Werewolves are family groups. They are basically big olâ dog families. Your werewolf family wouldnât be made up of alpha males fighting each other for dominance and subjugating females.Â
If there was a werewolf in your neighborhood, theyâd be that family of 10 kids always roughhousing outside and their house is the one all the neighborhood kids go to hang out at because Mr. Werewolf and Mrs. Werewolf are the Cool Parents that their kids find really embarrassing.Â
âWaitâŚEmily? Arenât she and her whole familyâŚyou know?â
âDonât believe everything youâve heard; worst thing thatâs ever happened over there is the twins teething on visitorsâ shoes.â
Hereâs the thing, though.
While the notion of the âalpha wolfâ is indeed misguided, being based on observations of wolves in captivity, the dominance thing does happen. And itâs not just the adult males; adult females do it too - but itâs only a thing when wolves who arenât related by blood end up sharing a habitat.
So consider: by some happenstance, two unrelated werewolf families end up living across the street from one another. Of course theyâre not going to start brawling in the streets - theyâre civilised people, after all - but that urge to show the other pack whoâs boss comes out in other ways, resulting in the two clans getting, like, weirdly competitive about everything.
Imagine the Halloweâen displays.
âWowâŚthe Phelans and Ochoas both really went all-out with the decorations. Are those real bones?â
âThatâs just how they are; theyâll find absolutely any excuse to showboat at each other like that. And theyâre definitely realâright down to the toothmarks.â
Something to think about though: Do you know what would be for all intents and purposes the *EXACT CIRCUMSTANCE* where wolves are shown to display the classic Alpha/Beta dominance behavior? ie A bunch of unrelated (usually âunmatedâ) young adults forced into close proximity in competition for unnaturally distributed resources? Where their actions are being observed and controlled by âimpartialâ and ignorant authorities? Where they are forced to be at crowded events when their âcyclesâ are flaring up?
SCHOOL
Regular public school, college, even and especially boarding school meet all the criteria to force young, undeveloped werewolves into an intensely unhealthy situation.
Of course the parents would know this, they would take steps to ensure their children were not stressed out.
Conclusions: Werewolves are homeschoolers.
That big, rowdy family whose science projects make the local news, who only shows up at school to ace the standardized testing once a year, who spends weeks at a time out on family hunting trips, whose innumerable uncles and aunts are always dropping in with food. Those are the werewolves.
