same as it ever was

lolll 😂 he thinks i hold any boundaries on my love 😂😂 he doesn't know that my love is limitless 😂😂😂

Every glasses-related poll honestly needs to be separated into diopter ranges like wrestling weight classes bc every timeeeeee these +1.25 bitches are in the notes like "OMG why would you wear glasses in the shower!! why would you wear glasses having sex!!" because without them i am functionally blind. you may as well turn the lights off at that point bc i am feeling my way to the pussy like Velma. those are my eyes, bitch

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

can you lez the fuck in

yes im addicted to attention and orgasms and food and shiny jewlery and 7$ Iced Lattes. does that really not sound like an awesome lifestyle to you

in modern au rote, amber and kettricken were roommates for a summer bc kettricken’s rich loser age gap boyfriend decided to seek enlightenment by going backpacking through the alps. he’s never gone backpacking before and he doesn’t even really go outside but he’s sure this will fix him. kettricken is obviously broken up about it so she moves in with amber who is also going through a breakup (her situationship mysteriously vanished but he does that sometimes). in their men-induced grief, amber dyes her hair and kettricken cuts herself a bob. kettricken spends most of her time arguing online with twitter user therealregalfarseer while amber has what she calls The Summer of the Marionettes

*street shot of zohran mamdani clad in nasty lil suit and hard hat* five months ago i was elected mayor of new york city. in that time, we have managed to COMPLETELY defeat the Staten Island Minotaur at no additional cost to the new york taxpayer