im a big fat liar. i dont know how to draw. Ive never drew anything in my life. I dont even know how to pick up the pencil or hold it for that matter. what even js a "drawing" lol
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@muscosus
im a big fat liar. i dont know how to draw. Ive never drew anything in my life. I dont even know how to pick up the pencil or hold it for that matter. what even js a "drawing" lol

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I've only done one more painting... and im not happy with it... and i did only one more felt map and i don't like it either....
CHEERING !!!!!!!!
day ??? no myeol

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WHY YES INDEED!
there's so much to say about this chapter so i'm gonna get a a bit sentimental here bc. augh. i love nao-chan to death. other trans people and me have said this hundreds of times already but her character is truly so wonderful. not only she's a full-fledged character, intricate and complex and human like all the other characters in the manga, she's a character other people look up to. she's a character other people need and seek. and it's not just things like mitsumi asking her for fashion advice, it's also how mika feels safe talking to her. i loved their conversation this chapter so much bc it's a bit different from the previous ones. it's not like the time they talked in the zoo or the elevator by chance, this time mika goes out of her way to speak alone with nao-chan. it's not every day that you see a well written trans character in manga, and there are even less trans characters that are mentors, role models or simply adult figures that kids trust and rely on. but nao-chan is all that. their relationship is so important to me. there's mika who's been bullied and shunned and has rebuilt herself from scratch just so she could fit in and be accepted and loved, but still doesn't feel any different inside. and there's nao-chan who, many years before, different location, different circumstances, has thought the exact same thing. and she can see that same pain in mika, she can see herself in her. mika tells her she felt a bit lonely and she cries for her. when nao-chan tells her she'll definitely find someone who loves her, she's not saying it to make her feel better, she's saying it as fact, bc nao-chan herself has found people who love her. i know their conversation is mainly about romantic love, at least on the surface, but bc it's sukirofa we know that's not all there is to it. by opening up, mika is slowly letting other people love her, letting other people see her. the girls, nao-chan. man, even mukai. she's letting herself love other people too. and if all that wasn't enough to make you bawl your eyes out, the chapter ends with nao-chan calling goro, her boyfriend, and inviting him to her hometown. "i got a bit lost but being with the kids helped turn it around". it's not only nao-chan who's influencing mika, mika is, unknowingly, giving nao-chan a little push as well. takamatsu couldn't have said it better: "I would like to carefully depict a school life where you can't tell who will save whom, who will get noticed and who will be moved into growing". nao-chan is saving mika and mika is saving nao-chan. they, and we, are saving each other all the time. and it makes me even happier to see a trans character, a trans woman, be at the center of this, because trans people have saved me
page on the left is from ch29, you can see it's really the same place. there's something so beautiful about nao-chan coming back to her hometown and facing the same sea she faced all those times she went there to cry, but as she is now. there's also something to say about how she's not totally sure that's the place, how she says "wasn't it somewhere around here?" and not "it was here". she doesn't need to go back there to cry anymore, she hasn't needed that in years, there's no reason for her to do so anymore. this is just a memory to her now. augh, my heart
Shout out to that one tumblr post that was like: "You know it's not just trans people who ponder their gender, it's healthy for cis people to take a look inside and be like! Yep that's all good!" And I read this post and was like.... like what do you look at inside though T O T??? I asked my boyfriend how he knew he was a boy and he said he just felt this unexplainable intrinsic feeling he was a boy... and I'm like... I HAVE GENUINELY NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT WTF 😭😭😭!!!!!!!! So apparently its like. Normal for people to feel this inexplicable 'Gender' feeling or whatever,,, I feel like how asexual people feel when they discover people around them aren't making up the fact they experience sexual arousal T O T
Obviously all my sciency stuff is just speculation! But I'm the type of person who believe that everything has a rationale behind it, and like an adopted child who is curious about their biological parents, I just am just interested in my origins! The field of genetics still is mostly just like,,,, hmmm we think this whatever MIGHT be a contributing factor to a person turning out this way... maybe. If you are more interested in the topic I discussed, just look up 'Genetic Memories in Animals' and there should be some more stuff OuO!
I'd love to hear how this 'inexplicable gender feeling' feels to gendered individuals! For those willing to share, I'd love to listen!

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mutuals whenever i like your post about being miserable please imagine me like this
NoHome is so utterly fucked for everything it does like. What do you mean Haejoon and Eunyung see each other as extensions of their mothers because they’re so deprived of motherly affection they’re helpless to the urge to project onto anyone that offers even a modicum of affection and understanding to them. But because of their dramatically different outlooks on family due to growing up in supportive, yet dysfunctional, versus outright abusive, households, Haejoon looks to Eunyung as a place of support to haphazardly fill the gaps his mothers loss carved in him, while Eunyung looks to Haejoon as a larger than life, inaccessible monolith of morality that he can never appease and must always be afraid of. And because of these juxtaposed views of one another they can never truly begin to understand each other despite knowing the most about one another compared to everyone else in their lives. With every step that molds them closer to each other there’s another barrier put up that prevents them from ever actually touching the others heart. What if I died.
Floppy is beautiful she kind of looks like David Lynch to me. Heavenly angel 🫶
Lmaooooo
we're moving to an internet where children would be banned from reaching out for help and friendship online but abusive parents can post their children's every second online to humiliate and expose them for money with no pushback

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I am euphoric