wait. what.

I’m looking disrespectfully. Show me that bulge king

the coworker who is too maternal and has correctly identified you as the runt of the office and won’t let you eat your lunch on break so you starve quicker and die

how to get up in the morning tutorial

how to get up in the morning walkthrough

how to get up in the morning tips and tricks

i read this as homestuck and then realized that it wasn’t homestuck before realizing that it was actually homestuck

I have been nothing but elusive and difficult to you and this is how you treat me

‘ She breasted boobily to the stairs, and titted downwards’ is the greatest fucking sentence I have ever read.

THE ORIGINAL??

aesthetic of the day is "isn't it exciting to realize you know better"

genuinely came on tumblr to see if someone clipped this bit so I can save it

tragic! guy who thought he was gonna get a video essay analysis only got an overly flowery summary! AND he had his lunch and everything ready to eat

soul crushing! guy who thought he was gonna get a video essay analysis actually did find one with well thought-out points but the narrator is so goddamn fucking annoying in how they talk and present information and the whole video is interspersed with unfunny memes!

The woke mob has made Santa gay! Mrs Claus has been replaced with a 5'8 twink named Tony Tinsel

invariably when i read or watch something and my thought is "i expected this to push the envelope a lot more, this touted itself as being weird but it could have gone further. it also over-explained an already obvious metaphor which comes across as self-conscious and mistrusting of your audience," i'll look at the reviews and half of them will be like "this was so weird im scared WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT!!!!!! i didn't know things like this were out there... i don't know who to talk about this with. this shouldn't be allowed to happen"

My favorite banned terms on this site are "suicide prevention" and "safe sex"

Fuck nasty and kill yourself inmediately after

Salmon male grindset

*points at your girlfriend* you know that thing would summon you as a skeleton warrior if you died right?

god I fucking hope so

The Gecko is friends with such icons as Time Flies and Bear In Mind