hyperspace

Why'd you have to go and become Superman? Like yay, happy for you. I suppose that's cool and all. Incredibly rude timing, though. Now I've got to share my mate with literally everyone. You got one of the biggest jobs on the planet. How am I meant to text you memes when you're busy carrying the DC Universe on your ridiculously broad shoulders? And if I hear the words sorry, mate, I'm saving Metropolis, even once, I'm blocking you. Don't forget about us peasants, yeah? / @corenswetpd

i'm picturing you saying this while crossing your arms and pouting, how accurate an image is that? because my daughter's a little older now, and i definitely recognize the tone. come on, though, like you don't know you're one of the folks i'd prioritize over the madness, and if not, i've been absent way longer than i've meant to be. well, you know i barely keep up with memes, and you're the one who keeps me in the loop. i'll make time to read them even if i don't understand and probably have to ask follow-up questions. and it's more likely i'd say i'm watching star wars or guys and dolls for the billionth time, and would you block me over some of the great loves of my life? promise it's not forgetting when i'll likely be back in your face a few hours later.

It was the perfect birthday gift for me, and I guess for you, too. Look at us, killing the game. We're so cool, David... except, 12:15? That's, like, so late. I might conk out on you, and you'll have to carry me around like a sack of potatoes. Or a really long pool noodle. That looks like a Wookie. God, it's going to be such a bizarre night, and I really hope we don't go viral, because if I do, it should 100% be as Princess Leia, not Chewie.

it's like the universe knew it had to give the two of us something special, i say. and here i was about to suggest getting really wild and aiming for 12:30. too much? that's one advantage of constantly having to bulk, i won't have a problem carrying you in case you happen to fall asleep. though a pool noodle? you'll have me experimenting on the best carrying methods and reporting when you're awake, made even better by you being dressed as a wookie. i was going to say, how come everyone's seen your princess leia and i haven't? am i not special? or would it be too demanding to ask for both her and the wookie? you can add something else to the red trunks to even things out, if you want.

i've spent a good chunk of my career playing people who'd probably make everyone around them a little nervous, and then i look at someone taking on superman and think... that might actually be more intimidating. people have such a clear idea of who that character is before you ever say a line. @corenswetpd

you’re right about the superman role being sort of intimidating when the character’s been around literal decades, not to mention played by some incredible actors before too. makes me feel lucky mine’s at least been embraced well enough for a second film. i’m chucking at most of your roles making people nervous, although that doesn’t apply to the pitt, does it? personally, he makes me want to be part of the night shift.

i hope you had a great birthday buddy. Superman should get everything he wants. @corenswetpd

thank you so much, man! it was definitely a great birthday between my family and friends spoiling me. honestly, i’d have been happy with the day just having cake, but they went above and beyond. i’m a pretty lucky guy in that regard. you’ve got a birthday coming up yourself, don’t you? any plans for it?

Since I'm the boss indeed, I'm telling you I'm flying out to ATL and we're having the wildest weekend of our lives. A double celebration of your birthday and my Emmy nom totally calls for us staying up until midnight – 12:05, if we're really feeling rebellious – and drinking exactly two beers each. As a congratulatory gift to me, you'll wear the red underpants, and as my gift to you I'll dress up as a Wookiee. What do you say? We got a deal?

i happen to like this plan, boss lady. not to mention it was a cool surprise finding out you'd been nominated, and on my birthday, no less. felt like an extra present! so i'm all for celebrating both together. hey, it'll be the weekend and we're going all out, all the rebellion. so 12:15, and maybe even adding a glass of celebratory champagne to go with the drinks. wait, you'll dress up as a wookie? because i can definitely break out the red trunks for the cause, and i also need no less than five selfies of the two of us. if you can agree to that, we've got a deal.

What do you mean, you thought no one knew you? I was here during The Politician days and I always assumed you would go on to do amazing things. Not weird at all. If anything, it's actually extremely impressive that you're able to keep out of that drama. I bet it does your mental health wonders. You seem to have found the cheat code everyone else is still searching for. No wonder you seem so refreshed every time I see you. Are you filming anything currently or enjoying some peace at home?

the politician days?! here i had no idea, but i'm grateful you've been around that long. though don't lie and say it wasn't mostly for ben platt because he's amazing and i couldn't blame anyone for that. that's mainly what i want to protect, my mental health, along with not having to worry about my daughter and her having privacy as she grows up. just the philly affect mainly, i love our city. i'm filming man of tomorrow right now, which has been a lot of fun so far. how about yourself, what's keeping you busy right now?

are we to the point where we are sick of each other's faces? i feel like it's possible, with everything! though, i think the world would flip out if they heard me ask you that. seriously though, i'm so happy that we got to hang out a bit while doing press! plus people are talking to me about the final scene in supergirl, quite a bit. @corenswetpd

are you trying to tell me something, milly? i'm hurt if you're already sick of my face, only because it'd be impossible for me to be sick of yours. i don't know if the world would flip out hearing that. they might understand you, though still doesn't break my heart any less. you know i'm happy we got to be there for your big premiere too, not to mention i'm proud of you and moreso after seeing the film. well, now you have to tell me what these people have said, i'm curious!

I’ve got to admit, seeing you pop up in the Superman suit was pretty wild. Like, alright then—so we’re just casually doing full superhero transformation arcs now? Who would’ve thought the guy from Twisters could clean up like that and suddenly be out here saving the world in red trunks? And filling them out quite nicely, might I add. Do you think Clark could take Tyler for a spin inside a tornado, or would even Superman be like, “yeah… I’m not insured for this”? Anyway—more importantly, how the hell have you been, dude?

trust me, it's just as surreal for me too! to go from thinking it'd be cool to play superman and not at all believing it'd actually happen to wearing the red trunks? madness, and putting them on every day doesn't lessen the feeling at all, my dude. i feel like superman might be game for taking a spin with tyler, although not before going a bit into protective dad mode first and making sure he knows all the dangers and is prepared for anything that can go wrong. and i've been good, keeping busy with filming. only minor complaint is bulking and having to limit the foods i love. how are you, though? i feel like every week, you pop up in a new project and add something else to my watch list. it's three miles long at this point.

So, now that you've dominated the box office with Superman, I can't imagine you're willing to stop there. What's the next big adventure for you, David? There has to be something on a hidden bucket list you're hoping to tick off soon. Can't imagine you to be the kind of man to allow the dust to settle. Everyone must want a piece of you now. I can only imagine the offers that have come your way in recent months. You can tell me. I'm terribly good at keeping secrets. @corenswetpd

funny you should ask, because i landed a broadway role not too long ago, so that definitely counts as the next big adventure. it's something i can tick off my bucket list since that's been a dream for a long time, and it's unreal that it's happening next year. and the great thing is you don't even have to keep that a secret since it's already been announced. i feel like you've painted a picture that i'm a bit of a workaholic, and that's only half true. i love being at home just as much as working, though i feel like being a dad has made me sort my priorities a little differently than i used to. things have to be worth it to be away from home, you know? though broadway very much is. but what about you? any projects i should be on the lookout for?

i can only hope so. i can only imagine, so many people forget that i'm a Brit simply because i am on all of these shows where i'm not haha. thank goodness that goose egg didn't last nearly as long as i thought it was gonna. it was a pretty bad whack. but i think that it was honestly an eye opening experience for me, maybe pay attention and not walk into things anymore. hahaha! and i feel like if that's what i learned from that experience, even if that's all i learned from that experience, then i'm doing a little better than i was before. i thought that was a great story to tell! i was trying to tap into my magical powers and i was hoping that suddenly they just appeared out of nowhere. they didn't. it hurt. i'm glad i could help you with a good excuse yourself! that's family for you, though. i have always felt that if your family wasn't making fun of you a little bit then they really didn't like you. i feel the same way about friends, too, though. if my friends don't pick on me and give me a little hell, then i feel like i must've done something to upset them somehow. now that's the time that you really look like a ninja practicing his karate moves! you end up with that false feeling, almost like you've got a stray hair on your arm somewhere, that you know you can feel but it just doesn't exist.

i think that's definitely it, that you've played so many non-brit roles that we assume you're not. also, i have to say it's hilarious how many brits just so perfectly speak american accents that we're just like, yeah, that's one of us. bravo to you all. i'm glad to goose egg is no more, although what a rough lesson not to walk into anything. laughing at anything is an ongoing lesson though, maybe when you make as many foolish mistakes as i do on a regular basis. you just have to laugh! see, and you never know when the magical powers will take hold. not that i'm telling you to walk into any more garage doors, though. you're not wrong, that the people who care the most about us are also the ones that tease us most, and only fair we do the same in return, right? that's another way to goose egg could have been a test, like anyone who didn't say anything about it might be upset for some reason. that's the worst feeling too, because then you start feeling webs and itching where it didn't even touch, thinking maybe a stray spider is wandering around.

It takes much more than some disappearing act for me to want to forget about someone. I was no longer sitting around replaying any of it in my head so it's good. It wasn't, but now that you've put it in my head, I'm annoyed I didn't think of it first… it really looks like I'm messing with your age. Of all the things Netflix could've thrown atyou, it picked the one show guaranteed to remind you of me. Either way I suppose I can't argue with the result. Life's been good, actually. I can't complain because I've had enough breathing room this past year. I've been in cast in two different projects as main lady, so I'm gonna be busy. What about you, though? How have you actually been? What's life looked like for you all this time, beside the superhero movie and all that.

i hope the replaying it in your head doesn't mean that you think you did anything wrong, because of course you didn't. either way though, i'm happy you didn't mind me reaching out. hey, at least now when you think of future old man jokes, you know i'll laugh at them and can share them if you want. i can't blame netflix. it was telling me to stop being silly and talk to you, and what do you know, sometimes it gets things right. i'm glad to hear life's been good for you, and absolutely take advantage of the breathing room. i don't know what that is lately, but maybe one day i'll discover it again. two projects though, that's exciting! can you say anything about them? well, when i haven't been doing the superhero thing, i've been doing the dad thing, so i feel like i just swing between those two worlds. although next year is going to look a little different with being on broadway, which feels entirely surreal to say.

It really is, isn't it? Those red underpants really captivated me. I think about them at least once a day. Aw, thank you, D. I'm just happy to be considered, but fingers crossed and I get at least one nomination, even if it's shared with the rest of the cast. Give me a time, date and location, and I'll show up and show you who's boss.

once a day? makes me sure glad i convinced james they should be part of the costume, because he was all ready to leave them off. this is validation for me. i'm crossing my fingers for you getting nominations! i'll root for both you and the rest of the cast, but mostly you. well, if you're the boss, aren't you supposed to be telling me when you'll show up so i can accommodate? the only part i can't really change is the atlanta part, but the rest? i can happily make room to see you.

I'm surprised you haven't made me sit through a marathon. I need you to know that your individualized order of watching the films still concerns me. Every time you explain it, I'm always feeling clueless. That said, I am absolutely in. I need to see how passionate you get when defending your opinions in real time. The drinking game is happening! I wasn't able to actually do it during our press tour. Now I need to make up for lost time. James would 100% be offended we didn't invite him, but I have to know, what are the ground rules for getting wasted around your boss? Maaybe we shouldn't tell him until after.

well, that has to change since we do need a star wars marathon and have to do that sometime before filming ends. and see, this is all the more reason for needing the marathon, because i can show you the sense in the ordering rather than telling it. you can experience it firsthand! and you know if there's anything i can rattle on endlessly about, it's star wars, so you'll hear all the opinions too. plus with a drinking game on top of it, i can't think of a more perfect day. maybe the ground rules for getting wasted with your boss should be to save it for after filming's finished. we can have ours, and then invite him to another if he gets too jealous over hearing about it.