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@control999

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Airbender Stan who sucks at airbending cus he's afraid of heights is actually so funny. I imagine Ford inventing an air balloon ship (guy yearns for space travel) thinking he could get Stan to fly them as high as possible but Stan can barely manage to get them off the ground for a few feet before giving up and telling Ford boats are superior let's never hop on an aircraft again! Then years later Stan masters the subcategory gravitybending(don't know if it exists but I say it does now) to compensate for his inability. Cus why be afraid of heights when there's no risk of falling? It's like swimming without water, and he likes swimming. Problem solved. Not to mention Stan moves better in zero gravity as seen in his escape scene in Not What He Seems.
Stan being an airbender is also perfect for being the caretaker of two firebender twins. If they start lighting things on fire he's the on-call fire extinguisher. But if it went like canon and Stan had to assume Ford's identity so he can't reveal he's actually a bender, he would just bullshit the kids about how the spirits in Gravity Falls doesn't like fire and hide his bending gestures as him sneezing or scratching or stretching. Post reveal Dipper can't really criticize Stan for hiding his bending ability when he was doing the same thing cus of his inferiority issues. Mabel takes it upon herself to be a guru for her helpless family(she found a totally accurate book about it).
Thank you, I also agree its very funny to give air bending to the guy who doesn't like his feet leaving the ground.
I'm also very much of the idea of Ford being horrendously jealous on some level that Stan can bend but he can't, and as a child he went about ways to 'even the playing field' so to speak, as well as ways to utilize Stan's bending to the fullest. And its fine when they're kids and its small things like cool pin wheels and super paper air planes, but then as they get older and its increasingly complex ways to create sustained flight Stan starts faltering.
And angst says Stan gained a fear of heights through one of these inventions going haywire, but I think its tragic in its own way if it had nothing to do with Ford at all. Or if it was even anything noteworthy. Stan's an air bender in an Earth and Fire household, in a neighborhood that's also primarily earth and fire, so he's entirely self taught. And most air benders would learn while they're young to trust the air to catch them (to catch themselves) but Stan doesn't have anyone, so all it takes is a few bullies shoving him and smacking his face on the concrete to create a foundation of 'Falling = Pain' that slowly grows and morphs into a fear of heights and an inability to trust his own bending.
Take that and being raised with lofty expectations in a household that doesn't promote open thinking and letting go of earthly possessions, is heavily raised with earth bending philosophy, earth bending bending, and you've got the worlds worst air bender on your hands.
But he's not going to tell anyone he's scared of heights. He's the only air bender in Glass Shard Beach, saying he's afraid of heights is a social death sentence.
Anyway as years go by Stan neglects practicing, Ford starts to resent the fact that his brother is a bender but doesn't use his gifts to excel, they have a fight, etc.
So here's where I started going digging through ATLA lore to examine sub categories of bending. Now while gravity bending isn't a thing (which makes its own kind of sense, as I don't even know where to begin to take apart gravity and fit it into an element) there is straight up flying for air benders. Its incredibly rare, the thing of myths, and the exact kind of thing Stan would figure out how to do and never think its a big deal because 'Well air benders fly. this is a thing everyone knows. This is basically air bending 101, nothing impressive.'
(Also I became very charmed with the idea of air benders not being able to fly not because they aren't letting go of all earthly attachments and goals and such (or whatever the reasoning stated in the wiki/dud who flew) but a lack of envisioning themselves carrying their own weight. Something something them understanding physics too much is the issue. Idk how to put it into words at this time, and thus shall end here)
Stan still can't do any basic air bending, but he can float around and no longer trips because he's floating around all the time. Still afraid of heights, but he can bob around and does start to feel more confident about some of his air bending techniques.
If this followed canon where he's still faking being Ford, the kids don't learn he's an air bender until after Ford gets back. Full stop Stan is the sole reason the house didn't burn down, but only behind the scenes. Their parents sent them his way because Ford learned fire bending techniques as Caryns sort of 'oh my poor non bender baby whose jealous of his bending brother whose learning earth bending styled air bending. Here's some fire bending training even if you're not a bender. As a treat' pity.
Unfortunately Stan knows very little fire bending, due to Filbrick going 'I'll send my bender son to Earth Bending School' despite the fact that Stan's an air bender.
Actually gonna retcon my own au. Filbrick is now an earth bender, to add some Flavor to his and Stan's relationship. Filbrick is so disappointed his only bending son is an air bender of all things and does make this Stan's problem. By teaching him Earth bending and crushing any attempt on Stan's part to learn air bending from air benders or their philosophies.
Back to thirty years, its one of those things where in hindsight its incredibly obvious that Stan was an air bender, but he never uses any techniques and uses exclusively a weird mix of primarily Earth bending techniques with fire ones sprinkled in. The kids are incredibly shocked to learn this, and slightly hurt, but all is forgiven in the end because Fords here to teach them real fire bending techniques and Stan was hiding to better save his brother.
Thats All I got for now. Haven't really thought about how Plot would be different to expand past that.
Ooohh, would the family learn Stan can truly fly with his air bending in this AU's version of The Stanchurian Candidate episode? Mabel and Dipper are in danger of falling to their deaths, Stan is climbing to rescue them except this time they fall before he gets to the top. So he throws himself off whatever he was climbing to fly over and catch them, then flies them all to safety.
It would be a toss-up if Dipper knows for sure what Stan did is impressive or if he isnt certain, especially when Stan insists it's the basics of air bending. Ford would know for sure, especially if he was there to see it in person, but there's no way he could convince Stan (at this point in their relationship) that his air bending is impressive. Stan would think Ford is overly impressed because he's a non-bender.
Or could go the slightly sadder route where Dipper is CERTAIN that was legitimate flying and tries to tell Ford, but Ford brushes him off because HE'S "certain" Stan isnt capable of that and Dipper must be mistaken. And either Dipper would set out to prove it to Ford (harrassing Stan, roping Mabel into trying to trap him into flying again) or Ford only learns post-reconciliation in this AU's version of their sea grunkle era. Then he's shocked and Dipper gets to say "I told you so!" and they all have to fight an uphill battle convincing Stan that it isn't "just the basics" of air bending. 😂
In this case Stan, being the only air bender they really know (since most air benders are monks/not in Gravity Falls) they'd take his word that flying is a normal thing every air bender can do. The kids sees this amazing feat of air bending and everyone just lets it slide by because Stan himself doesn't think its a big deal. Yeah yeah he flew. He's an air bender. They all fly.
Which, as far as everyone else is aware, is true. Air benders fly. Everyone knows this.
Doesn't mean Dipper doesn't go running to tell Ford, just that (in his mind) he's got this cool story about how Stan saves him that Grunkle Ford is rolling his eyes about.
Actually funny idea (in a sad way): Dipper runs off to tell Ford this story later about how Stan flew up and saved them, and sees Ford roll his eyes about it. He thinks because Fords still angry with Stan at the time, and is slightly upset on Stan's behalf but brushes it off. Its actually because Ford interpreted Dippers "Grunkle Stan flew threw the air and saved us!" as "Stanley used the traditional air bending methods of flight (staff gliding, burst of air for propulsion) and grabbed us out of the air!"
No big deal. Stan's an air bender, all air benders know how to do (assisted) flight.
And then post reconciliation Ford stares as Stan very nonchalantly flies up so he can grab something from a high shelf and realizes very quickly he and the children have been having two different conversations in regards to Stan's flying. Any attempt at trying to convince Stan that him flying is something incredible is met with 'It's just flying Sixer. Everyone knows air benders fly.' Ford introduces Stan to other air benders to try and prove it and Stan always without fails goes 'wow these guys can't even fly? They're worse benders then I am.'
told myself i'd make a short sketches during my break time.. i made a whole ass comic
For you, a gift, written into the ask box.
Ford was still scribbling notes on his latest dissected specimen when the elevator hummed to life. He glanced at the elevator.
It would probably be fine. Now that Ford had a barrier up to protect his home from Bill, he had plenty of time to work on this. He could get the portal running at any time. Who knew what long term effects Stanley would experience if he waited too long to solve this problem.
Stanley probably wouldn't be happy to see what Ford was working on, though. Should he hide it? He glanced from the journal page before him, then the specimen, then at the jar of still living specimens beside him.
The elevator slowed and came to a stop. Too late now.
Ford turned away from his work desk just as the elevator doors slid open. Stanley stepped out, holding a plate covered in tinfoil. The constant hum that accompanied his brother was inaudible, but Ford could easily see the bees flying around him.
"Don't glare at me, poindexter." Stanley grumbled. "It's long past dinnertime, and since you still hadn't made your way up, I made you something."
"I am not glaring at you." Ford mumbled.
Stan scoffed. "Sure, whatever." As he approached Ford's desk, the buzzing slowly increased in volume.
Stan set the plate down with a clatter. "Bone appateeth, or whatever."
"Thank you, Stanley. I do appreciate the effort."
"Don't worry about it." He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "It's just the last of what you had in your fridge. If you wanna eat tomorrow, you'll hafta go shopping."
Ford's fingers stilled just before he touched the tinfoil. He turned his head to look at his twin. "You seem rather relaxed about the fact I have no food in my house."
Stanley shrugged.
Ford stared at his twin for a long moment. Then he turned back to the covered plate. "You said this was the last of it, right?"
Stanley nodded.
"Have you already eaten dinner, then?"
Another shrug. "Nah, I haven't. Just not really hungry, y'know?"
Ford frowned at him. Even though they'd been apart for ten years, Ford liked to think he knew his brother well. Most of his mannerisms were the same now as they had been when they were teenagers, so it was easy for Ford to pick up when his twin was lying.
But he wasn't, which didn't make sense. The Stanley Ford knew had never been the type to skip meals. He was always the one dragging Ford home before dinner, or to one of the stalls on the boardwalk when neither of them wanted to be home yet.
"I haven't seen you eat a single thing since you arrived here a few days ago." He said slowly. "How can you not be hungry?"
Stanley shrugged a third time. "I don't really get very hungry anymore." He said, voice lazy and indifferent. "As long as these babies get enough nectar or sugar water-" Stanley patted his stomach, and the bee's buzzing grew louder, but settled down quickly. "- I'm fine."
Ford frowned. "That just-" He sighed. "It does not sound right to me, Stanley. I don't think-"
"Stanford." Stanley's voice was firm. "Back off. Me and my bees are fine. We have a good thing goin', here. I shelter 'em, they keep me warm. I make sure they get nectar, I don't get hungry. It's fine." He sighed, reaching up to scratch his head. Thankfully for Ford's sanity, the bee's buzzing stayed at the same level. "I don't get why you keep making a big deal of this. You're just-" Stanley frowned. "What's the word for, uh, making a mountain from a molehill?"
"I'm not catastrophizing, Stanley, I-"
Stanley snapped his fingers. The bees flying around all made their way back to him. "Catastrophizing! Yea. You're just doing that. You need to quit being so paranoid, Sixer." Stanley moved his hand up to one of the bees that had just landed, lightly rubbing a knuckle against it. If Ford didn't know better, he could have sworn the insect pressed back against the contact.
"We take care of each other." Stanley continued. "I don't understand why you insist on trying to see the worst in them."
Ford watched as one of the bees crawled down Stan's arm and disappeared into one of the holes in his skin.
A shiver ran down Ford's spine. The very thought of how that would feel against his nerve endings left him twitchy and needing a shower.
"Right." He mumbled. "I don't understand either."
BEE STAN
HE'S STAN! HE'S FULL OF BEES! HE IS DOING THE OPPOSITE OF CATASTROPHIZING! MAN VERY UNDERWHELMED BY WHATS HAPPENING TO HIM! PLEASE! PLEASE BE MORE WORRIED ABOUT THE BEES STAN!
Stan's slowly starving to death (?) and full of bees and Ford's being a very normal level of concerned about this.
This is so close to being horror. Toeing the line of The Horror of being Full of Bees but also its fine. Its sooo good actually. Don't even worry about it.
God I love Bee Stan. He's such a guy. Please feel more intense worry about your circumstances. Please let your brother make sure you're not actively dying.
Thank you so much for placing this baby in my inbox. I promise to love and cherish it. Then chuck it into the Tumblr Stream so other people can Look at it.
Funny question: I wonder how Jerk! Ford's Mabel and Dipper would react to seeing cannon Ford being nice to his mabel and Dipper? Would they be jealous? Or would they be confused?
I don't think the Mystery Twins would meet canon Ford or their counterparts, but Jerk Ford does tell them about his interactions with the Fordverse.
Jerk Ford: -there was Cat Ford, Ford-46'\, Ford-35C; that's usually what we called each other, by the name of our original Dimension. I would have been "Ford-PJC311", but no one ever called me that. Mabel: What'd they call you? Jerk Ford: "Jerk Ford" Dipper: Mabel: Dipper: You have got to be kidding me. WE got stuck with the jerk?! Jerk Ford: Oh please, pipsqueak, the other Fords were equally as petty and nasty as me. They just chose to take it out on only one person. Mabel: Who? Jerk Ford: Someone who would give them an infinite number of chances. That's why they did it, you know. Because they knew they'd be forgiven in the end.

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Hey thinking about that "fird is cured of Creature after he kills Stan" thing and like. What if uts a magic paradite kinda thing, can only infect a freshly dead corpse kinda thing. So it evolved to kill someone the body was close to-ie, loved ones- so that it can infect a new host. And then the previous one falls over, empty. But whatever Stan did that made Ford half-alive made it so the parasite leaving fixes Ford, abd now he's normal alive.
Anyway all this to say: Ford wakes up after killing his twin just to watch his twin turn into The Creature
So I saw these at the same time, but was able to answer @curi0uscanine first, so here's a screen shot.
On that note, the idea of The Creature being a parasitic thing that meshes with its host and targets loved ones because they're most likely to put their guard down implies that Ford was the target of a previous The Creature.
I propose Fiddleford who, lacking a nearby wife or son to torment, instead went for Ford. That does mean he's now a shriveled corpse somewhere. I propose his skeleton is in the bunker where Creature Ford lived.
Anyway back to Creature Ford successfully killing Stan, and then the Thing That Was Creature Ford slipping away to become Creature Stan and leaving Ford behind, covered in his brothers blood and haunted by his actions from the past however-long he was The Creature. And now he's watching his brother go through the same process, and oh god whats happening what has he done and-
And then its just this. Looney tunes swapping Creature time back and forth and getting mad at each other for slipping up and getting killed or getting killed so the other has to deal with some problem the other made. Yeah yeah their brother's corpse is hosting a Creature that's trying to kill them, but never mind all that. Stan hit a road block in his research and now its Fords turn to be a human person, and now Fords going to strangle Stan with his own hands while fully human.
Creature Ford
Imagine, if you will, for just a moment
Somehow Ford comes back to life and still remembers all of what he did
Imagine he was just chasing the twins and was about to kill one of them but then something happens and he's alive
Ooooh thats a good one. Even better if its limited in some way or another, just to add that time limit strain of knowing he was trying to kill the people dear to him and that at a certain moment the Thing he became will happily do so again, so obviously he has to take himself out before that happens and save them.
Stan's not going to let him do that of course, but Ford won't forgive him for that either.
Anyway I do think that if Ford, for whatever reason, was shocked back into being alive while moments away from murdering one of the kids, he'd just. Stop. Freeze. Stare at this kid who he's never met but Knows and Loves and this is his niece/nephew (Hard to say which one) and he was going to kill them and enjoy it and was convinced they would enjoy it to would understand that this is how he was showing love and-
on Mabel and Dippers end they were just about to see their twin meet a grisly end and then The Creature that looked like their Grunkle just pauses.
Its the perfect time to smash him with a bat and run for their lives.
They make it all the way back to the safety of Stan (wherever that is, either they were in the woods or Ford got into the house, and in any case Stan generally = safety) and huddle there terrified for a long time before Ford stumbles there, brown eyed and looking like a deer in the headlights at their expressions.
Like I said, I do think its best if this is temporary, but they don't realize until closer to the time limit. Stan's just so, so happy to have his actual brother back, and dragging him around and hugging him and introducing him to the children properly and just bursting with happiness, while Dipper is at max suspicion and Mabel is also happy to meet a version of her grunkle Ford that doesn't promise to kill her throughout the day.
And then the reveal happens (Dipper figures it out I think), and Dipper at this point does feel bad about ruining the good cheer, and Mabel is distraught about it, but its better they figured it out sooner rather than later. Stan's also distraught to learn Fords going to Creature soon, but he's also full of renewed hope that there's a chance he can save Ford, which is why he's not going to let Ford kill himself so that he can't return to being a Creature.
It'd be a very bitter sweet thing really.
Creature Ford
Imagine, if you will, for just a moment
Somehow Ford comes back to life and still remembers all of what he did
Imagine he was just chasing the twins and was about to kill one of them but then something happens and he's alive
Ooooh thats a good one. Even better if its limited in some way or another, just to add that time limit strain of knowing he was trying to kill the people dear to him and that at a certain moment the Thing he became will happily do so again, so obviously he has to take himself out before that happens and save them.
Stan's not going to let him do that of course, but Ford won't forgive him for that either.
Anyway I do think that if Ford, for whatever reason, was shocked back into being alive while moments away from murdering one of the kids, he'd just. Stop. Freeze. Stare at this kid who he's never met but Knows and Loves and this is his niece/nephew (Hard to say which one) and he was going to kill them and enjoy it and was convinced they would enjoy it to would understand that this is how he was showing love and-
on Mabel and Dippers end they were just about to see their twin meet a grisly end and then The Creature that looked like their Grunkle just pauses.
Its the perfect time to smash him with a bat and run for their lives.
They make it all the way back to the safety of Stan (wherever that is, either they were in the woods or Ford got into the house, and in any case Stan generally = safety) and huddle there terrified for a long time before Ford stumbles there, brown eyed and looking like a deer in the headlights at their expressions.
Like I said, I do think its best if this is temporary, but they don't realize until closer to the time limit. Stan's just so, so happy to have his actual brother back, and dragging him around and hugging him and introducing him to the children properly and just bursting with happiness, while Dipper is at max suspicion and Mabel is also happy to meet a version of her grunkle Ford that doesn't promise to kill her throughout the day.
And then the reveal happens (Dipper figures it out I think), and Dipper at this point does feel bad about ruining the good cheer, and Mabel is distraught about it, but its better they figured it out sooner rather than later. Stan's also distraught to learn Fords going to Creature soon, but he's also full of renewed hope that there's a chance he can save Ford, which is why he's not going to let Ford kill himself so that he can't return to being a Creature.
It'd be a very bitter sweet thing really.
Timestuck au where 80's Ford gets himself stuck in the future, or even funnier, he just got dragged to the future when the twins appeared outside of his house. Maybe he reached them just before the time tape fritzed out and brought them back to the present. Dipper and Mabel are too far into their own back-and-forth issues to bother with their young Grunkle at the moment so Ford is left to grasp the realization that he just time traveled due to two kids. And he's currently standing in an unfamiliar environment without any of his tools and Journals, in a t-shirt and socks.
He watches as one of the children with the time-travel device disappears in a flash of light and the other remains at the totem pole, knocking her head against it.
Hm. This may be an issue.
Awkwardly, Ford shuffles his way to the edge of the crowds, straightening his glasses and looking around. It seems he's found himself in a sort of fairgrounds, based on the games and rides scattered around. He doesn't recognize any of the people here, expectedly, and while his curiosity is killing him, he doesn't want to wander too far from possibly the only people who can return him to his correct time.
Ford wanders on the edge of the fairgrounds for most of the day, peeking in on the girl at the totem pole occasionally. He does consider approaching her, but he knows he'd most likely mess up that social interaction. He's never been the best at comforting people, especially children.
At one such check, he startles to find her gone. He nearly begins to panic before he spots her and her brother(? They look exceptionally similar to be anything but siblings.) with a pig near the dubiously-built ferris wheel. He can't see the device they had earlier in their hands, so he's about to walk up to them when a older man beats him to it.
The man looks enough like Pa, with the Order of the Holy Maceral fez and suit that Ford swears is packed somewhere in his attic at home, that he's already thrown off-guard. And then the man speaks, and the voice sounds far too similar to-
"Stanley??"
The man doesn't respond to his voice until the children turn to look at him. Only then does the man turn as well, and then freezes and goes ghost-white when they lock eyes.
"That- that's not possible."
Ford, now incensed and confused on the idea that Stanley has planted himself in his town, storms forward to demand an explanation.
"Stanley, what on Earth are you doing here? Have you seriously followed me all the way to Gravity Falls? Are you here to invade on my research, I've barely settled in! Are you here to ruin my future ag- again? Um."
It's only after he's gotten up into his suspiciously silent brother's face that he remembers; he's in the future. Very far in the future given his brother's grey hair, and it is very much a possibility that they'd made up by now. Surely they can't remain angry at each other forever?
The longer Stan goes without speaking, the less confident he feels, and the more embarrassed he becomes about his outburst. He has no way of knowing the condition of their relationship and situation, he just took the first opportunity to lash out at his brother.
"Stanley? I thought your name was Stanford."
Ford jumps at the reminder of the children standing right next to them and looks down to see twin pairs of eyes scrutinizing them both. He swallows and tucks his hands behind himself nervously, turning his eyes away in an attempt to evade their focus.
"Well, um, yes. My name is Stanford Pines, and I'm a researcher here in Gravity Falls. Ah. Assuming that's where we are still. I hadn't considered spacial displacement, although there must be some involved. We were just outside my house when you brought me here, so-"
Ford startles by a hand brushing against his arm. When he turns back to his brother, Stanley's eyes are flicking over his face with a sort of desperation, like he hasn't seen him in a long time. Alarm flares in his mind when he notices a shine appear over them.
"You're... You're real..."
Ford suddenly, violently, feels like something has gone terribly wrong.
Ford learns that the children are his great niblings, Shermie's grandchildren. It does explain the uncanny resemblance that they have to his and Stanley's childhood appearances. They explain that they were sent to stay with their great uncle Stanford for the summer, presumably the old man they'd spent a few weeks with already. Ford had originally assumed he'd just gone on a research trip shortly before the children had brought him here and him and Stan had pulled the old twin-switch. There's just one issue with that hypothesis.
The children do not know Stanley. They have never even heard of Stanley. As far as they are aware, their family has only ever spoken of Stanford as the youngest of two sons.
On top of that, the more he looks, the less he finds. There's only a few pictures hung on the walls, and they only ever depict the one man and occasionally his employees. No sign of a twin at all.
Ford has to sit down and reconsider the possible causes for this discrepancy. His hands itch for his Journal so he can write down his thoughts and observations. For now, he has to survive with his mental notes.
His first consideration is that Stanley has taken his place for some reason, but that doesn't explain why he'd never be mentioned even in passing. And surely his childhood had come up at some point in time? There's rarely a picture before graduation where one of them was alone in one. He writes that one off as unlikely.
The second is that he didn't time travel, but instead jumped to a different dimension. While it would explain the lack of a twin, if Stanley and he had never split into two separate people. Unfortunately, it would seem that Stanley was the dominant genetics given the lack of a sixth finger and his overall habits. But that doesn't explain "Stan's" reaction to his appearance. He hadn't acted like someone seeing a younger version of himself, but like Ford was someone he hadn't seen in a long time. Or knew he'd never see again.
The thought sat heavy in his chest and had dragged forth his last hypothesis. One of them, most likely Ford himself, had died early on in life. Perhaps even before the science fair. He doesn't like the idea, but it's a high possibility, given how Stan keeps his eyes trained on him like he'll disappear if he looks away. He keeps tapping his hand against Ford's arms and shoulder, like reconfirming to himself that he's not an apparition.
But that doesn't explain why this man is called Stanford. Surely Stan wouldn't steal his name after his death, he'd never forgive himself. Especially at a young of an age that he believes the death happened. Although, depending on how young they would have been, their Father might have had a hand in legally changing Stan's name to the smarter twin's as some irrational hope Stan would take after him once he was gone.
He runs with this train of thought before it is aggressively derailed when Stan nudges him again. This time, something about his hand caught Ford's eye, and he snatches the man's wrist before he can pull away. Ford feels his face drain of blood as he inspects the long scar in the middle of his hand, reaching from the connecting tissue all the way down to his wrist. He flips the hand over and finds it continues on the palm. Ford grabs the other hand and finds an identical scar on that one.
When he presses their palms together, his worst fears are confirmed. The scar lines up exactly where his extra middle digit is. A botched surgery that removed the entire segment from the hand and closed up the space between the middle and ring finger. Both hands.
He looks up to find guilty eyes, filled with sorrow and regret.
"You... Wh... But then..."
Stanford sighs wearily, taking him by the wrist and moving to leave the house.
"There uh... There's somethin' I should show ya..."
Ford follows his future self numbly, horror creating a clog in his throat as he realizes the implications of this change of events. The man in front of him is him, not Stanley, and he'd at some point gone through with the procedure to remove his oddity. The scars are old, but not stretched like they'd be if it happened from a young age. Removing his fingers was his choice. And with all of that...
Where is Stanley?
Tears are already forming in his eyes when they enter Gravity Falls' cemetery.
Stan leads him to the far corner of the courtyard, behind a hill like the graves are being hidden. Stan walks with a focus, following a path he's likely taken many times before. They walk past nameless headstones, cracked and overgrown with neglect. There's one in the dark corner, just on the property line.
'Stan Pines
1954-1982'
That's it. Nothing else is written on the headstone. Not even his full name.
1982. That's barely 4 years in the future. They weren't even 30 years old.
"Ma paid for the grave, but with her savings tied in with Pa's... I mean, you know how he is with money."
Where would Ford be, when his brother died? Would he still be here, writing in his Journals and naively living life to the fullest? How long would it be before he knew his twin had died? Did he feel it? Would he feel it when Stanley takes his last breath?
Is that why Stanford removed his fingers? Is that why he acts like Stanley, goes by his nickname? It must be. He can already feel the grief tearing at his heart, seeing his brother's dead body must have done significant damage on his mind. And it would explain how Stan looks at him, they must still look exceptionally similar. They're twins after all.
Some brother he turned out to be.
Stan is talking to him, saying something about a car crash and the store he'd turned his house into. Ford doesn't intake any of it. There has to be a way to fix this. He'll need to go back to his own time eventually. He can fix this.
He won't accept failure. Not with this.
Or: Through a series of misunderstandings, Ford thinks that he spiraled after Stan died young and Stan thinks Ford's gone quiet and hyper-focused because he's preparing to stop the portal incident. Because Stan was explaining literally everything that happened when they were at the fake grave, Ford just wasn't listening to a damn thing he said.
Maybe Ford is overlooked by the Time Police for a while because they're busy handling the other time anomalies that the twins caused. Stan probably gets Ford to help with the portal too, while Ford thinks it's a giant time machine that could send him back home.
Everything goes a bit sideways when actual future Ford comes back out of the portal and immediately picks a fight with Stanley, and then nearly shoots Ford because he thinks he's the Shapeshifter. But now Ford knows how Stan felt when Stanford went through the portal because he was absolutely ready to raise hell to keep Stan from dying in his time, so he's kind of at odds with both Stanley and Stanford for entirely different reasons.
Sigh.... Deadpool Powers Stanley Pines...
Self destructive but also no he won't fucking out himself through trouble just because he can't die, regrowing limbs sucks.
Mullet Stan getting shot with Ford's crossbow, dying and then coming back and having to LIVE with the knowledge that his brother tried to (and sorta did) kill him (definitely thinks it was on purpose).
Or just old Stan trying to pretend he isn't pratically immortal and somehow returning from things without a scratch. That dinosaur killed him, most definitely, but the pig is safe and shah ignore the weird slash covered in blood on him- do you see a wound? He sure as heck doesn't!

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The Cuddle Bug AU
The cuddle bug: an other-dimensional sickness, one that presents with flu-like symptoms and mental distress unless the afflicted individual is in physical contact with another person, which calms the sickness. Treatment is consistent and prolonged physical contact with another to aid in recovery.
Two possible scenarios:
Ford contracts the cuddle bug during his time dimension hopping, and comes down with the illness shortly after Stan successfully reopens the portal and brings him back home. Ford is aware of what the cuddle bug is after having encountered it before, but is hesitant to tell his family about it.
Eventually, Dipper notices Ford getting sicker and sicker, and manages to get the truth out of him. Dipper then offers to help Ford get better, and also tells Mabel. Mabel is always down for cuddles and willing to help, but sees an opportunity to get her uncles to bridge the gap between them.
So Mabel tells Stan, who doesn’t believe her at first. He’s only convinced once he sees the proof of how ill Ford has gotten, and Mabel and Dipper work to convince Stan to help Ford get better. Stan is against it and Ford is against it, but the kids are persistent. And in the end, Stan would do just about anything for his brother.
Cue family cuddle pile to ease Ford’s symptoms and help him recover from the illness.
OR
Ford contracts the cuddle bug not long after he begins exploring Gravity Falls. At first, he has no idea what the illness is, because it can’t be found outside of Gravity Falls. He slowly gets sicker and sicker and medications are not helping. It’s a gnome or some anomaly that eventually informs him about the cuddle bug.
Ford theorizes the bug is an other-dimensional sickness that slipped between the cracks into Gravity Falls. Hearing about what the apparent cure for the illness is makes him scoff. Surely he doesn’t need to cuddle with anyone to get over it. That part is probably made up.
Except he gets sicker. And sicker. And his mental health deteriorates. He can’t work in his condition, and despite all his studying about the bug, Ford has not found any sort of cure. Growing desperate to get better, Ford finally caves and decides to try the physical contact route.
Except he doesn’t know anyone in town, and the one friend he made in university just got married. He debates calling his mother, but she’d never be able to come out to Gravity Falls on her own, his father would come with her. Ford does not want Filbrick to find out about any of this.
Really, in the end, there was only ever one person Ford would be willing to call about such an issue. It ends up being really not that difficult to get Stan to agree to come see him.
Stan is highly skeptical about this “cuddle bug” sickness Ford tells him about, but he hopes this could be a chance to reconcile with his brother. And it does turn out that way, after lots of arguing and yelling and cuddling. Ford finally starts to recovery with the physical contact, and their relationship starts to recover as well.
Creature Ford is so creature. Since Stan sleeps after the night is over does “normal” Ford ever go into his room to watch him sleep? Like “haha good morning Stanley! You got away from me again but I’ll kill you tonight!” All smiles of course. Or does Stan have his room so thoroughly guarded and locked that Ford can’t/doesn’t bother trying to get in?
Can’t imagine the life this Stan lives. Spend all night trying to defend yourself from your creature brother(?) and then in the morning said creature brother is in your kitchen trying to make you breakfast.
Creature Ford is so creature. He's not Ford at all and he's all that's left of Ford and he loves his brother so much the thing that used to be him desires nothing more than to murder Stan as an expression of love.
"Normal" Ford 100% goes into Stan's room to watch him sleep. Not all day, not every day, and not all the time, but enough that Stan no longer opens his eyes to see Ford and reacts by screaming/attacking him. Its not uncommon for Stan to wake up to see Ford looming over him smiling with a "Good Morning Stanley!" followed by how proud Ford is that Stan survived the night and another promise to do better this next one, which is then followed by Stan smacking him with a pillow.
Almost paradoxically, Stan's room is also thee most warded and safe room in the house. Once the sun sets Ford can't step foot on the stairs, and its Stan's last line of defense he's loath to use if he can avoid it.
Basically the wards that Stan has up are to protect him from supernatural threats. A thing that Ford isn't during daylight hours. He's "normal" and would never hurt Stan during this time, so the wards are nothing more than fancy woodwork and such. But! He also can't tamper them in any way, because him tampering with them would be so he could more easily kill Stan, which would label him a threat. Its a very fine line Ford walks, a line he jumps off of once night hits and he loses attic privileges.
Stan is a very reluctant horror protagonist that's been through just. So much horror from the monster that wears his brothers face and at one point was his brother. Every evening he wakes up and has to scramble to build up defenses to survive the night and once the sun rises Ford vanishes and reappears on the front door and politely knocks until Stan lets him in so he can laugh about whatever horrors happened, tell Stan how proud he is of him, then try to make Stan breakfast and gets back to his research. The whiplash makes it hard to feel one way or the other about him.
But! The fact that Ford tries to make him breakfast and is otherwise totally normal (besides all the promises of a gruesome end by his hand) is also Stans fault. I couldn't figure out a good way to mesh it without adding a third time stream that would be too confusing, but Ford originally was not normal at all during the day. For the first five-ish years Stan had no idea what Ford wanted except to kill him, and the sun rising was not a promise of safety, just safer then night time. If it was too cloudy or Stan ventured somewhere dark alone Ford would pop up and try to kill him.
Stan spent that time trying to figure out how to fix Ford, and his first and only successful attempt gave him "normal" Ford.
Imagine with me. You're Stan. For the last five years a thing wearing your brother's face has been trying to kill you, and you find evidence that it was once your brother, but Something happened to him to make him like That. You finally figure out a way to undo what happened and (after some other stuff) slam him with this fixer upper.
The sun rises. You get a knock on the door. You open it. For the first time in years your brother stands there, eyes brown and smile.. the same, but less threatening overall, and he actually speaks, for the first time, with actual words. He tells you he's happy to speak to you, he tells you how proud of you he is for surviving for so long with so little to work with.
He opens his arms.
You hug him. Its a little chilly, but he's not trying to strangle you and you can hear his heart beat for the first time and its fantastic. The best thing ever in fact.
You never want it to end.
And then he whispers into your ear how he can't wait to rip your heart out tonight.
Suffice to say, the next few years were incredibly miserable for him. About the same amount of miserable as the previous five, as before he assumed Ford wanted to kill him because he was still angry, and now he knows Ford's doing it because he loves him so much. Somehow learning this doesn't make the rest of Fords behavior better.
I love playing around with my style. He’s so silly.
As much as ford dreamed of being a super famous scientist, someone who changed the world, one of the greats, etc, I think if he ACTUALLY accomplished that he would end up getting real sick of being famous. There’s so much about fame he would probably just find annoying. Like I just want to go to the store and get ramen now I gotta stop and (ugh) sign autographs. I go into public and people RECOGNIZE me and want to TALK to me and I’m not always in a talking mood.
It’s really funny to imagine like. (Assuming this is a universe where Stan is alive.) Him getting so sick of fame he’s just like. Hey Stanley I know we haven’t talked to each other in 10 years but wanna go sailing together like our childhood dream? Also I faked my own death. Here’s a crab. Sorry did I say a crab I meant several crabs. I figured you could do another one of your crab fighting rings like you used to when we were kids. Y’know. For entertainment. On our boat. I haven’t slept in 3 days. Here’s some money. I forget where I got it. Maybe I stole it? I don’t remember. I think I may have also set something on fire. Actually it might have been more than 3 days . Here is a presentation and some graphs on why u should go sailing with me. And an essay and several scientific illustrations. (The essay just says “please” over and over and the “scientific illustration” is a doodle of them on a boat with rainbows and sunshine and the word “yay” written on it. The graph says “our happiness levels if we go on a boat” and a curve going up.”) Actually it might have been a week since I last slept. I don’t remember. I think my blood is more coffee than blood at this point. Also do you have a fake name I could use. I know you have lots of fake names. You love those. Just don’t make it a lame one. Also could we get matching fake names. Since we’re brothers. No I will not go to bed Stanley let’s go on a boat I didn’t do a very good job faking my own death and I don’t want people to find out before I drop off the face of the earth—
Silly thing for my good timeline ABW au:
Reporter: so, Dr. Pines, how do you feel about your brother’s recent kidnapping?
Ford: Stanley’s been kidnapped?!?!
Reporter: Yes. Is there any statement you’d like to ma—
Ford: [takes a book out of his trenchcoat and flips it open, starts chanting in Latin, his eyes roll back and start glowing, wind starts blowing and the everything gets darker.]
[Suddenly, a demon/monster appears out of a portal that just opened the ground, holding Stanley out in front of it by the back of his jacket, making Stanley look like a scruffed kitten]
Ford: hello Stanley
Stanley: hey Ford.
Stan: …what did I tell you about using “Marvin” to get me back when I’m kidnapped?
Ford: but this method is so quick and convenient!
[the Stan’s start bickering while Ford absentmindedly gives the creature its payment]
The reporter:

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might I interest you in about 40 hours of work condensed into 4 minutes?
Dark cat ford is the least threatening of all dark Ford, because as a car he now knows Bills sus and also can't work on the portal, since he has no thumbs.
Depending on which of the now millions of cat versions he is changes his relationship with Stan slightly.
In a world where they were always cats and Stan got turned into human, Fords like a cartoon villain with his giant monster brother. Making various evil cat plans and riding around on Stan's shoulders, cackling at the accidental destruction his brother causes. Stan's concerned about his brothers behavior, but it's not like he can sit down and have a conversation about it like this, so instead he just hangs out and makes sure the cat police can't get him.
In a world where Ford got turned into a cat and Stan happened to appear in Gravity Falls, Ford abandons the portal (if he was working on it) and just hangs out with Stan now, as his cat, for almost the exact same reasons Stan did in the of fic. Stan likes the cat better! And now Ford can attack anyone who even looks at Stan with no repercussions! Mostly!
Except his brothers homeless :( that won't do, so Ford tries to get Stan to move into his old human house. Ford doesn't need it anymore after all, he's a cat now. This would lead to a very short series of shenanigans as the townsfolk mistake Stan for Ford, and Stan quickly realizes this is his brothers house when his own mother calls.
Now Stan's living in a mystery novel as he tries to find out what happened to his brother, and Ford does literally nothing to help him. He's just :3 purring up a storm and draping himself across Stan at all times, attacking anyone who tries to interact with his Stan with various success depending on how fast Stan can grab him before he launches himself at people.