Blorbo Torment Nexus

(Stan^4 by @thoughtless-in-space)

So many Stan’s and Ford’s. Gift Stan just wants to leave them to their mess until he sees the Ford’s hurt. Then he’s 🥺🥺 This is what happens to versions of his brother when Ford isn’t evil and doesn’t choose to join Bill? Hatred for Bill magnified.

Also maybe a little “why can’t my Ford be less evil and more like these Ford’s? These Ford’s seem nice.” Although a little awkward if teen or paranoid Ford show any sort of resentment to him, because Gift Stan is only used to his Ford showing him smothering amounts of love. He doesn’t really know what to do with a Ford who maybe doesn’t like him.

Gift Ford is butting into everyone’s business. If he learns Bill threatened the Stan’s he’s not happy. He likes Grunkle Ford. Look at this feral guy, doing his best to protect Stanley :) what a good Ford—hey! No biting >:(

Each Stan gets their turn being cooed over because they’ve been through “something so so scary” and big brother has to comfort them so they feel better :)

He doesn’t understand why the Ford’s won’t just open the portal and let Bill in though. Take advantage of the situation, guys! Bill can give you power and everything you want. Oh, did he try to kill Stan? This Bill can rot then :)

The youngest Stan’s get fretted over the most. Gift Ford is picking them up and cuddling kid and teen Stan and telling them how wonderful they are and how nothing is their fault, they don’t know any better, and it’s all okay because big brother will help now. He tells Mullet and Grunkle Stan this as well, and is very happy to see how close the Grunkle twins are.

HFHSHHDJFGHSGDJG it’s an insane experience that someone sent an ask about my guys here. THEY’VE BREACHED CONTAINMENT!!! But oh boy this is so fun and interesting so I’m gonna drop my takes on the responses to the Gifties.

Grunkle Ford. HATES Gift Ford from the moment he learned he sided with Bill. He starts off very formal and Ford-ly but he slowly becomes more detached and quiet the more Gift Ford reveals… the way he is. Until he’s full on snarling in warning any time Gift Ford gets too close to one of the Stans. Sure, gift Ford has powers, but this Ford is one who went toe to toe with Bill at full power in the nightmare realm and won and was just about to kill him. If Gift Ford steps out of line at all he will happily inform him of this fact (out of earshot of anyone whose memories Bill could infiltrate. He might also tell him that they successfully killed Bill in his timeline and if he wants to avoid the same fate he will Behave.) Literally if he crosses any boundary he will have to contend with the risk of having his throat ripped out by teeth.

Grunk Stan is pretty yikes about everything and gives Gift Stan bad (good?) life advice. Talks about how sick it is that he’s equals with his Ford and if he learns anything about his situation he’s gonna give him the extra 30 years of advice on ‘conning’ him that he’s familiar with.

Every Ford (and tbh most Stans) are immediately like. This guy is in a situation (pointing at Gift Stan) and there’s a universal urge to adopt / protect him from Gift Ford. Grunk Ford is mentally cataloguing ways to work around the soul tether thing. It’s a whole thing.

I think teen and Paranoia Ford’s would be kind of confused by Gift Stan and the way he’s a bit of a softer touch than their own. It’ll be uncomfortable interacting but not like… outright dislike. If they catch a single whiff of his situation as I say that awkwardness goes out of the way of we need to Help This Guy.

Obviously probably not able to happen but hey a Ford can dream.

I think kid Stan gets that affection and is initially like oh yeah cool but once he catches on to the absolute Rancid Vibes™️ and tension of everyone else (Stan’s pretty emotionally in tune) it’s sort of like. Hm. Who is this guy touching me actually. I think teen Stan who’s also desperate for validation is willing to put up with a bit more (probably the most out of everyone) with Gift Ford and overlook more red flags. Mullet Stan is in a weird space because he is like yeah brotherly love is great but (uncomfortably peers at his alternate self) … that’s not. Fab.

Grunk Stan is however absolutely not gonna take being called the younger brother and will slap him with a ‘kid I’m old enough to be yer dad’. If he keeps doing it he’ll sic Grunk Ford on him. Absolutely no to any touching or affection. He’s more sympathetic to Gift Ford than Grunk Ford is but that is. Not a high bar HDHSJFF

“You would be subjecting him to a slow, agonizing, cruel death. Do you want that?” Gift Ford’s expression darkens. “Do you want that?”

If Grunkle Ford gives any indication of being okay with Gift Stan’s death then Gift Ford’s rage explodes. As it is, if Grunkle Ford attempts any intimidation by getting close in Gift Ford’s space, Gift Ford just telekinetically picks him up and sets him down a few feet away each time. But as long as Grunkle Ford doesn’t do anything that would threaten Gift Stan, Gift Ford is not hostile to him. He likes this Ford, even if he is unreasonable sometimes.

The Gift twin’s soul situation is something that could only be changed by the axolotl itself. (Though GoG Stan might be able to alter it to an extent.)

But Gift Ford is pleased to see how the other Ford’s seem to like and want to help his Stan. Of course they like his Stan. His Stan is the best of all Stan’s! :)

I love the kids picking up on the vibes lmao. Gift Ford really does have Rancid Vibes. He exudes some level of “predator” and causes most humans to get the uncanny valley feeling around him. It’s usually fairly lowkey because Gift Ford reigns himself in, but he can push that aura out and make it stronger at will (or when he loses control and gets mad).

Grunkle Stan is still getting called little brother regardless and Mr “lack of boundaries and won’t take no for answer” wants a hug. He needs to hug every Stan in the room :( and show them he loves them.

Gift Stan is torn between pleading with Grunkle Stan to just let Gift Ford hug him once, and pleading with Gift Ford to back off because Grunkle Ford is looming nearby. There’s also a chance that, if Gift Stan senses tension from Grunkle Ford, it triggers his fawn response to try and stop Grunkle Ford from getting mad. Running up to him and throwing his arms around him with big sad eyes and saying, “oh, please don’t be upset, big brother? 🥺”

The other problem here is if Grunkle Ford and Gift Ford did get into some sort of physical altercation, it might set off Gift Stan 😔 Because Gift Stan. Can be just as possessive and obsessive of his twin as Gift Ford is of him, he just won’t admit it. The difference between them is that Gift Ford is a control freak with a personality disorder and no morals, and Gift Stan isn’t. So Gift Stan doesn’t display those traits the way Gift Ford does. The latent genes lurk within him though. They just have to be provoked by specific situations.

Gift Stan will help his brother if Gift Ford gets attacked. Even if he has no particular skills or powers and might not actually be helpful, their shared soul influences the Gift twins to protect each other from threat. Gift Stan might be in A Situation with his Ford and wish things were different, but an attack on Gift Ford could potentially trigger a deep rage within Gift Stan that he isn’t actually aware he has. The split soul’s defence mechanism to keep itself alive.

Telling Grunk Ford that killing Gift Ford would kill Gift Stan would admittedly get him to back down a little, but only a little. It would devolve his threats from I’ll kill you to I will make it HURT. Gift Ford doesn’t need both his arms, right? Whilst Gift Ford has more power and is generally a bit messed up, Grunk Ford has been desensitised and familiarised with just about every abhorrent thing you can do to a person in the multiverse and has the scars to prove it. There are far worse things you can do to an enemy than killing them.

HDHHWJDHDF GoG mention imagine appealing to your alternate deity self like uhhh heyyy anything you can do about this maybeee…? Would Gift Ford be happy if GoG Stan handled it because it means his brother is safe in the event something happened to him, or mad/upset because it makes his Stan less dependent on him/he perceives it as making them less “close”?

FHSHDJDHF Mr. “Off-Putting to kids” 😭😭 the older 2 Fords might want to research that had they met under different circumstances.

Yeah no, Grunk Stan will only take so much of being called that before he does something to get him to back off. If he invades his personal space, Grunkle Stan will employ a very efficient method his brother taught/gave him called ‘multiversal taser’ calibrated to a high setting. Despite the gap in feral to not feral, both Grunks are on equal footing on the ‘not fucking around’ front.

See the thing about Gift Stan fawning to Grunk Ford is that depending on how upset he is in the current situation he is effectively fawning to. A Tiger. Who does not speak English. But does usually have protective instincts over Stan, so depending on the situation, because he perceives Gift Ford as a threat the ‘scruff him and take him to a safe location’ instinct might take over.

I think Grunk Stan might need to be the between man for this situation that effectively communicates. Hey. This is a trauma / survival instinct that [Gift Ford] is setting off. This guy was tortured literally every way humanly imaginable and also non humanly imaginable. If anyone gets mad at his Ford for being feral he will be very staunchly defensive of him as though it’s a personal offence. He would not spare either Gift Sibling the details because he wants them to know just how severely Bill fucked this variant of his brother over and why seeing a version of himself who is very clearly part-Bill will set off a LOT of processes.

I think a physical altercation may not be able to get very far because Grunk Stan (and maybe some of the other ^4 Stans) would be trying to calm Grunk Ford down. Stan can communicate with him to a degree when he’s feral so he’ll be trying to vocalise to him that this isn’t a great idea.

But also if Gift Stan tries to join in there’s a degree of hesitation on that front as well, which given that everyone is pretty protective of him, there’s a much greater pooled effort in trying to calm down the Tiger.

I think Grunk Stan would have a go at Gift Ford for provoking his brother that badly just because he couldn’t listen to basic requests not to do xyz.

There’s the real risk that if they upset Grunk Stan too much he might have a memory lapse to a traumatic Stan incident (which tbf Gift Stan may recognise the exact memory of depending on when it’s set) which is…,.. a whole other can of worms.

Gift Ford post taser would exude that “danger-predator” aura for a minute (that Grunk Ford is probably mostly immune to) before reigning his control in again because he won’t hurt a Stan. But he also won’t be tricked twice! Jail for Grunk Stan for a thousand years! (Gift Ford telekinetically yanks the taser away and floats Grunk Stan into a corner to “sit there and think about what you’ve done, baby brother.”)

Gift Stan is anxiously chewing his nails watching his twin piss off a room full of themselves 😔 He’d also be absolutely horrified and sick to his stomach if Grunk Stan shared what Grunk Ford has been through.

Gift Ford is just annoyed that they upset his sensitive baby brother by telling him that. He is unaffected by Grunk Ford’s threats or what he’s experienced. Gift Ford is incapable of putting himself in another’s shoes, and is only able to feel real empathy when it involves Gift Stan (because of the soul bond). Even with the rest of the Pines family, Gift Ford is only acting out empathy and compassion towards them, not actually feeling it.

If those horrible things had happened to Grunk Stan, Gift Ford might feel a pang of something about it, but another Ford he’s just ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Gift Ford himself has inflicted gruesome inhumane tortures and experiments on other beings. He just has not told Gift Stan about any of that because he knows Gift Stan would be horrified.

Grunk Ford: step out of line and lose your arms.

Gift Ford: lmao yeah okay. Let’s trade torture techniques! :) you probably know so many from your travels! Tell me :)

The way threats work on Gift Ford is not because they make him wary for his own sake, but because he’s always thinking about Gift Stan. A threat to Gift Ford’s wellbeing could affect Gift Stan and his ability to protect his little brother, so Gift Ford takes threats into account for that reason. He would be more reckless with himself otherwise.

If Grunk Stan steps in to calm Grunk Ford, Gift Stan (if there’s no violence happening) might take it upon himself to calm his own twin with his ultimate trump card that he’s very embarrassed to pull. He tells the others to not stare at or judge him. Then he works himself up into the biggest, blubbery crying fit he can, whining about how big brother is upsetting him and how scared he is and how he wishes big brother would stop.

This works every time at the cost of Gift Stan’s pride because Gift Ford will switch to “poor baby brother” mode and try to calm him down. (Gift Stan finds the whole thing rather humiliating, he won’t be able to look anyone in the eye for a while after.)

Gift Stan would absolutely be scared of Grunk Ford going feral though, because for him an angry Ford is a bad Ford. He is usually doing whatever he can to avoid an angry Ford. If Gift Stan did get involved in a physical fight between the Ford’s, it’s like a mouse inserting itself between fighting cats :( not going well for him, even if he can’t help his own response to it.

But oof, if Grunk Stan had a memory episode, Gift Stan would be freaking out because he knows Gift Ford would immediately try the “poor baby brother” coddling thing in response, and Gift Stan is aware that that will not go well. He’d be trying to distract Gift Ford so he doesn’t crowd Grunk Stan.

He himself would want to check and see if Grunk Stan is okay, but by that point Gift Stan is probably trying to convince his twin to leave. The tension between Grunk and Gift Ford is too much for him and he wants to go. All “Please please please can we just leave now, big brother? I’m tired and want to go home :(”

I think the Gift twins would be weird about their soul bond actually changing. To sever it entirely in a way where both twins can survive with no connection between them is probably something the Axolotl itself would have to do, but I think GoG Stan would be able to alter the bond and change how it works. Gift Ford would be interested if he could do anything about them being able to be long distances from each other or in separate dimensions.

But if GoG Stan did mess with the bond, there’s a good chance that even if the Gift twins requested it, they’d both freak upon having it done because now things feel different and it’s not right. This is not how they’re supposed to be. Something is different, something is wrong, something is missing that they can’t feel anymore.

Agile ford

Oh, absolutely

Putting my Son of Stan!Stan and Simon in front of Gift Ford and seeing how he reacts. Like a little white mouse and I’m placing forms of enrichment in front of him to see which ones he likes.

He’s flabbergasted by Stan with a son. Specifically Simon. Takes one look at the kid and is like “DID YOU HAVE A BABY WITH BILL???”

Simon is very fascinating to him though. Gift Ford is not put off by Simon’s behaviour or weirdness. There’s nothing wrong with that boy except why does he have Bill’s eye? Also Stanley how irresponsible of you to have a child when you already have a hard time looking after yourself. Where’s your big brother? He should be helping you. Look at how ragged and run down you are! Come here, Gift Ford will make things better :)

The idea of Stan having a kid is just wild to him. He’s never really considered it. This isn’t his Stan though, so it’s okay. But look at this poor Stanley—is he missing limbs?!