Blorbo Torment Nexus

Set in the millionaire Ford AU here

Stan stared uncomprehendingly at the gift box that had been set before him. Even though Ford had invited him up to celebrate their birthday together—their first one shared since Stan had been disowned—for some reason he hadn’t expected Ford to get him a gift. It hadn’t crossed his mind that his brother would consider buying something for him.

But then again, why wouldn’t he? Ford was a millionaire now, even if he didn’t flaunt his wealth. Buying a birthday present was no problem for him.

It was a problem for Stan though, because Stan hadn’t gotten Ford a gift. He hadn’t thought Ford would give him something, so he hadn’t bothered to bring something for Ford. And that was a huge problem, because now there was a gift in front of him, and Stan—having given Ford the impression that he too was a successful millionaire—had nothing to gift in return.

And the worst part was that even if he had thought about it, he wouldn’t have been able to afford a gift. Stan was flat broke, in debt and lying through his teeth to his brother so that Ford would like him again.

“Aren’t you going to open it?” Ford asked, interrupting Stan’s mental spiral.

“Y-Yeah, of course,” Stan tried to inject fake cheer into his voice.

He opened the gift carefully, holding his breath. Breath that rushed out of him in a shocked exhale as he saw what was inside.

A watch. A very, very expensive looking watch.

Ford looked proud of himself at Stan’s reaction, smiling. “I bet you’ve been eyeing one of these since they were announced, hm? I know how much you always liked gold chains and accessories. This is one of those special order models—the one that was advertised as having only a limited amount in production? I had it imported from Italy.”

A special edition watch imported from Italy. Stan’s stomach sank. This thing had probably cost Ford thousands. It was probably worth more than everything Stan owned combined.

Stan plastered on a smile of his own, turning his shock and unease into something casually pleased, like the price tag on the watch was no big deal to him. Ford thought he was rich too; he couldn’t overreact over a gift and blow his cover.

“Yeah, wow, Ford. It’s great,” Stan said, and Ford beamed brighter, clearly patting himself on the back for a successful gift. “Can’t believe you nailed my taste so well. I love it.”

That wasn’t a lie. Stan did love it. He did love expensive watches and gold chains and nice things. He just couldn’t afford them.

So far on these visits to Ford’s house, Stan had gotten away with looking like the vagrant he was. Ford didn’t flaunt his wealth, so Stan claimed that he kept it low-key during casual visits since he knew Ford preferred that. Ford had even thanked him for his consideration, and never questioned Stan’s old clothes or rundown car again.

But now he had something he couldn’t get away with, because Ford had just given him a birthday gift, and Stan had nothing to give in return. So he resorted to what he did best: he lied.

“Speaking of imports, yours hasn’t come in yet,” he said casually, picking up the watch and admiring it. “That’s why I didn’t mention anything about gifts earlier. I felt kinda bad showing up for our birthday empty handed, but you know what international shipping is like. Can’t control it.”

Ford waved him off. “Oh, that’s alright, Stanley. The gifts aren’t as important to me as spending time together. I’m really glad you were able to make time in your busy schedule to come see me on our birthday. I know you probably have tons of friends who wanted to celebrate with you, but it’s been so long since we shared a birthday together. I’m grateful you chose to come here, even if it’s not the type of party you’re probably used to.”

“Hey.” Stan nudged his brother. “Nobody’s more important than you, Sixer.”

That wasn’t a lie either. Stan just wished he’d always been equally important to Ford too.

He tried to shove that thought away. Things were going well now. Ford liked him again. Granted, that was only because he thought Stan was rich and successful, but that didn’t matter. What mattered was that Ford had offered Stan a chance to be brothers again, and Stan wasn’t going to ruin it.

“Buuuut…” Ford drew out the word, giving Stan wide puppy-dog eyes. “You could always give me a hint at what you got me. Since I have to wait.”

Stan felt his insides freeze into ice, but he kept his grin up. “Are you kidding? That’d spoil the surprise!”

He had no idea what he was going to get Ford, or how—

The watch glinted in the sunlight from the window, and Stan realized the answer was right there.

He’d have to find something for Ford. Something really good and really expensive; enough to rival what Ford had gotten him. And if Stan found himself unable to steal his chosen gift, well. He now had something in his hands he could sell to buy it.

The thought pained his heart, less so because of the money and more because this was the first gift Ford had bought him since they were teenagers. The first gift Stan had been given since he was thrown out of their childhood home. But… but he’d promised Ford something good, and now he had to put his nonexistent money where his mouth was.

Besides, as much as Stan wanted to keep the watch, he lived in his car. It wasn’t easy holding onto expensive items when you lived on the streets. Even if you got hold of them, someone else would take them from you at some point. Stan had robbed people and been robbed himself many times. He’d had his car broken into, his meager belongings stolen. It happened.

It was probably best to sell the watch as soon as he could and use the money to buy something for Ford, rather than wait too long and have it be stolen down the road.

He crushed the wistful part of him that whispered that the money from selling the watch would be enough to put a down payment on a small house. It was a silly thought. He’d never be able to afford the mortgage and bills. And besides that, where would he live? What was the point of living somewhere all alone, with no friends or family close by?

“Let me see you put it on,” Ford demanded suddenly, interrupting Stan’s musings.

Stan blinked but said nothing as Ford snatched the watch from his hand and fixed it around Stan’s wrist. It fit great.

“It looks amazing on you!” Ford praised.

“Haha, yeah, it does!” Stan hoped his smile didn’t look as empty as he felt. “You sure know how to pick em.”

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE STAN TWINS I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

Fellas... I miss my wife😭

Warm up doodle before drawing him naked

I guess they're still kids at heart after all

Bonus doodle under cut

What if, in another world - by the infinite nature of multiverse - the portal was functional enough for another run right there in the portal room, that blistery cold 1982 winter day. What if, when Stanley threw enough things around and pressed enough buttons and the portal opened again (in the same spot in the Nightmare Realm it had before) (not calibrated to Ford like had been in canon) the Ford had stepped out was the one from his final confrontation with Bill. What if Ford stepped out thirty years older and wiser and angrier

What if he saw Stanley crying, relieved, and then terrified and confused and devastated. What if he, at sixty years old, saw Stanley and saw only a scared child, half his age. His brother.

Just some fics I’ve read recently that I’ve enjoyed and found interesting and think deserve more love.

Nothing More Compelling by emjam

“It don't line up the exact same, but my mama told me stories.” Fiddleford caged himself with his arms, looking away. “About Blue Ridge travellers ran off by ghostly black dogs with big red eyes. In some stories, the dog's a protector. But in others, it's an omen.”

A tale Ford had dismissed as a child, convinced that the varied and vague reports indicated this particular oddity was only fictional. Perhaps his child self had been hasty. He tilted his head. “An omen of?”

Fiddleford uncurled himself and looked Ford in the eye. “Death.”

(Ford Pines is intrigued by a new anomaly.

Stan Pines, as the unwitting new anomaly, is having a bad time.)

Red Light Go, Green Light Stop by iguana8llama

Bill is Dead.

He did it. Stanley tricked the demon to his end and now it's time to face the music himself...

Is that an axolotl?

Or: Stanley gets shipped back to a pivotal moment in his life and has a chance to rebuild bridges and live a life once thought lost forever.

Stan^4 by Lost_in_Thoughtless

The Sea Grunks are at it again, this time accidentally disturbing an unusual rift left by Time Baby's ironically untimely demise.

Now they're in the 80s, and ready to protect the younger version of their twin... hey who are those kids.

(A frankly insane Twins in Time AU where each Stan gets paired with their Child and 80s Brother variants, and their own Teenage variant - resulting in 4 pairs of twins roaming the most dangerous time of the 80s)

break no more by FluffyAngstWriter

Brrring…

Ford's head snapped up, eyes narrowing. The phone? Who on earth would be calling him at this hour? Certainly not any of his professors. One of his colleagues? More likely, but he had told them repeatedly not to call him late at night.

Irritation flared.

The man made his way over to the landline, glaring for a brief moment and imagining letting it ring–

Brrring!

–But who knew how long they would try to call him for. He wasn't keen on adding a headache to everything.

This had better be important.

With a long-suffering sigh, he picked up the phone, "Hello? Stanford Pines speaking."

A pause. Then:

Hello, this is Head Nurse Vandermeer from Henry County Hospital, calling regarding a John Doe patient currently held in the ICU...

And Ford's world, so simple, tipped on its axis.

---

or: Ford gets a call regarding Stanley's failing health in the hospital. It all goes downhill from there.

The AXOLOTL’s Blessing by BlackFoy

Bill Cipher had been a human for over thirty years. Finding out that the prophecy of the zodiacs, when completed, would turn him into a weak, defenseless human had been the shock of the century, but now that he had lived life as a human… he wouldn’t have it any other way. Unfortunately, he didn’t get a choice, as time traveling randomly into the past robbed him of said human body. Oh well, guess he had about thirty years to kill! Time to wrangle his humans into some form of healthy habits!

closed doors and broken bottles by carpetchewer

it doesn't take much for a deal to go wrong, out in the multiverse, and, despite going through the portal together six years ago, stan and ford pines still run into trouble from time to time--especially because of all the baggage they're carrying.

but this trade is essential. will their own shortsightedness cost them crucial, life-changing technology?

cws: ptsd, derealization, guns/violence, unhealthy codependency, murder, and panic attacks

my take on the blind faith au by @pinesinthewoods.

a business transaction by anonymous

After spending the last two days rereading the same paragraph, Ford decides to look for chemical assistance in staying awake long enough to complete his thesis.

Meanwhile, Stan’s life since he was thrown out on the streets hasn’t exactly gone great. But things are looking up now that Stan is finally making it as a small time drug dealer selling to college students with too much spending money on their hands.

Or: The Stan twins' reunion goes down at a drug deal.

If I should try, would you catch me? by ArtistRedFox

Stan's footsteps crunch in the dead leaves. The closer he walks to the edge, the less leaves there are, until he stands only on green grass and earth. He leans forward, peering over the edge. When the height barely even makes him dizzy, he moves even closer. The wind brushes his hair back, running cold fingers over his jaw. The injuries still ache, so the coolness is welcome. The whole of Gravity Falls is spread out below him.

How was the Fall? by longthroes

During his time in the portal, Ford woke up on a bed of golden flowers at the bottom of a mountain.

What is this, some kind of under tale?

Would it be autocannibalism to eat your twin brother? by ArtistRedFox

What if the House of Leaves loved you. What if it didn't want to let you go. What if it was lonely, so hungry for companionship that it refused to let you find an exit?

What if it was your twin brother?

The Negotiator by Lost_in_Thoughtless

Dejected, Stan leaves Ford's house - prepared to bury his dumb journal somewhere on the other side of the world. That is, until, a new player introduces himself to the game - one who speaks a language Stan understands well.

Stan wants to be a twin again - and if the portal is the only thing getting in the way, then surely that can be easily fixed. Plus, the offer of godhood is a pretty cool perk to round that off with.