Knit or Flail

It’s so SO insane to me that people have a problem with Lupita perfect timeless face Nyong’o in the Odyssey and not Matt Damon who looks like he has never known a world without Dunkin’ Donuts

We talk very little about soup. And I think soup is very, very important.

My mans unlocked a higher level of synesthesia

i think it is important to recognize the ways in which your favorite thing sucks. i think it keeps u normal

idk who needs to hear this but it’s healthier for you to just accept that you’re gonna be kinda fat than it is to live the rest of your life miserably trying to monitor yourself to maintain a skinny weight your body doesn’t want to hold onto

stop drinking beer with the deer and come have a cider with the spiderrrr

I can no longer feel the infinite sadness

i fucking hate the “this is the good luck post.” Girl stop contributing to a superstitious environment with ur anecdotes there’s a million goddamn notes on it it’s statistically reasonable that a bunch of people remember the good things that happen after they reblog it

this is the statistically reasonable post, reblogging it will have no effect except for putting this post on your blog

guys this post really works! I reblogged it and it really did put the post on my blog! you need to try it!

person (non-practicing)

ah doing ma thing just like god int- (remembers im atheist) just like the universe intend- (remembers i don't believe in determinism) just like noone and nothing intended ever. doin ma thang fucking unpredictable style

sorry i can’t go out tonight i’m at home sitting down

What if you poked me in the chest and your finger broke through like you were cracking into a rotted plank of wood and dust came out and I just crumpled into nothing and my spores got into your nose

I would not hang out with you again that's for sure!

Well there you have it!

Item: Corset of Visibility