there's a black hole in the living room floor

If I keep practicing I might even be a person soon

why is everyone so mean. how aren’t you tired

I always know its getting toasty out in the world because girls start reblogging this post like crazy

I’ve been dragging our giant ottoman over to a floor vent and dangling over the side so the AC directly targets my underboob. 10/10 more passive version of the comic idea

i wear my headphones all day to listen to my frequency that keeps me docile

going on a guilt trip do yall want anything

if you really cared about me you wouldn't have to ask

I hear being kind is punk but is it ska? Is being kind ska? I don't care about being kind unless it's ska.

the locked tomb is simply a story about everyone fighting over who gets to be the dead wife

my grandfather was talking to me about a book he read on how politicians gave control to rich people and it fucked america and he was like "oh yeah this reminded me of a video I watched. It was Robert Reich. Do you know who Robert Reich is? He was clinton's secretary of labor" and I just nodded silently because I didn't know how to explain to my grandpa that yes I know who Robert Reich is. I watch his son psychologically torment improv comedians

Norway. Norway listen to me. I need you to kill them alright? I need you to bring back the Viking invasions of the Middle Ages. I need you to devastate them body mind and soul. I need you to break all their legs and cut off their heads and stick them on spikes outside the stadium.