gentleman lesbian

what do you mean my disability disables my abilities? what the fuck

saw a comment that misspelled “kind gesture” as “kind jester” and am now imagining a beautiful world where we praise good samaritans by calling them kind jesters. good on you, you gentle fool. you’ve made the world a sweeter and sillier place.

one of the best things about cats is that sometimes they'll just purr because youre around them

When the post goes triple platinum in the mutual circle and you have to scroll past the same thing seven times in a row

i think if you showed minecraft or fortnite to a little medieval peasant boy he would probably start writing parodies of church hymns. it’s human nature

working with kids and one of them says “you know you eat 8 spiders a night on average right?” and another goes “no no no those statistics are actually skewed by people who like eat spiders recreationally for fun and stuff” and my head snapped up like a fucking sleeper agent

they're trying to get me to do something called ""my job"" instead of reading about medieval english poaching laws

HELLO ! have you thought about Van Gogh’s First Steps today ?

playing stupid games but im really bad at them so im not even winning the stupid prizes

sob emoji is up there with the period and the comma

When I was a kid watching tv was idiot coded and nerds read books, but now scrolling shortform videos is considered braindead behavior and watching tv means you're some kinda intellectual. You might think this shifting assessment of media's consumers might make readers into absolute super geniuses, but no. Only perverts read now.