aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

.That Judge Judy Pussy grip insane. You be calling her Judith on the second stroke.

My grip will rip your junk off, chew it up, and spit it back at you.

Imagine how I feel

Pets love to show up like Hello i am Mystery Wet :)

was lamenting the fact that my eczema is flaring up when the thought "the itcher" popped into my head fully formed and unprompted and now i can't stop laughing

Mr president we have reason to suspect their is a masquito in the oval office

guy who turns into a glass of milk when he gets angry and girl who turns into a plate of cookies when she's upset having a bitter argument with each other next to the chimney on christmas eve at 11:59 pm

#2735641 original posts remain

Whyd no one tell me alligator Gars scientific name is Atrocious Spatula

Hungarian art

Wаnnа liск Ashley pussy?

no thanks

outta my way gayboy i’m boutta get it

my identity has been stolen

spider-man 2002 is actually such a funny movie and not even in the “oh so cringey” way. peter waving to mj when she was actually waving to her friends? the ‘go web go’ scene??? peter dragging a cafeteria tray across the cafeteria??? peter finding out he had super powers and immediately jumping off a building and flinging himself into a wall???? peter absolutely demolishing his room and telling his aunt it’s a science project???? peters first costume? so fucking funny

Accurate depiction of what would happen if a teenager got superpowers

a dimension 20 themed um actually episode where they have all the intrepid heroes on and they have to answer trivia questions about their own campaigns. brennan is trapped in a soundproofed glass box to the side banging on the walls desperately trying to answer questions but is not allowed to participate

i love minecraft waiting behaviors. Writing on a sign and you can vaguely see your friend hopping around making spontaneous parkour out of the terrain while they wait for you to finish. writing a message in chat and having the person you’re talking to crouch right in front of you or stand as close to you as possible while they wait for you to finish. Finally finishing writing in a book only to see your friend has made several new furniture pieces and/or surrounded you in a cobblestone cube that may or may not have a sign on it. theres something so charming to it

Thinking about 13 Latvias again

when you think about it tho pliny the elder is kind of the funniest guy in the world like. he wrote all these books about natural history that he was wrong about where he confidently claims things like “some animals only have blood during certain parts of the year” and then when mt. vesuvius erupted and destroyed pompeii and herculaneum he said “oh mt vesuvius is exploding? let me go check it out” and then he died

the man was committed to science. he wasn’t very good at it. but he was committed