madstablook

I was talking with the gnomes and they don't even think you are worth playing whimsical little tricks and japes on.

I’m not entirely sure that the statue really needed to have a tit out.

How dare women try to have nipples.

Actually I’ve seen this before and I can tell you— it’s because these women were bad ass pirates and when they killed someone they’d expose one or both breasts so that when their victim died, (s)he knew that they were killed by a woman.

Fascinating! 

From the sounds of it they proved rather the idea women were bad luck on a ship cus if they boarded yours you were shit out of luck

she’s that perfect combination of extremely judgemental and supportive

“god you fucking dumbass hope you feel better soon bud”

5rd

we all know Jack Black is not limited by our simple universe

this post is such a rollercoaster

I fully understand why westerners thought the platypus was a hoax at first. I’m looking at a real live one moving around and it STILL looks fake.

The one thing that could have made them sound any more made up would have been if you said the boys have secret viper fangs that can absolutely fuck you up with venom, and they do, on their goddamn feet.

cursed platypus facts: * five (5) X chromosomes * only the left ovary works * produces milk but has no nipples. the mother just kind of sweats milk out their chest. nature is beautiful * was nearly called the “duckmole” * swims with its weird fish eyes and ears closed, hunting entirely by electroreception * born with teeth, but then they fall out

This animal can’t be real, fake news

alien water cat

fixating on games is like “oh boy! i haven’t played this in months!” and then you end up playing 60+ hours and never touch it again until the cycle starts up again

AND YET A TRACE OF THE TRUE SELF EXISTS IN THE FALSE SELF