What do you mean i can't have a Girlfriend

The fact that Aperture Science canonically has a gender-neutral, polyamory-friendly partnership policy isn't a joke about Cave Johnson being inexplicably pro-queer. It's because their corporate medical plan allows them to experiment on your spouse. More spouses means more test subjects. That's the joke.

If you can roll up a coin you deserve to snort coke imo

it is so annoying being so self aware about all my issues like okay what now girl

this is the one meme that manages to age like a fine wine

why are you as an adult watching things at full volume in a public space

i have a random issue with a handful of pre-srar fall out boy songs where I LOVE the the start of the song or just generally everything but the chorus, but the chorus itself i find kind of underwhelming (eg: ilalwtwiattgyo, ttotbo, igatrimeanomf, cfmrfrpfmsr, gblogbd(dyptstsasgts)

poor thing...walked straight into the electric fence

Basically what I'm getting from the present "giving 100% at work" Tumblr discourse is that a lot of people have fairly narrow notions of what blue-collar versus white-collar jobs actually entail. There are in fact manual labour jobs where a significant chunk of your average work day consists of Fucking Around, and conversely, there are desk jobs where you crunch eighty-hour weeks for years on end until you suddenly drop dead from heart failure at age 32. It's absolutely true that you're more likely to end up in a No Fucking Around Allowed situation in a blue-collar occupation, but you can't tell whether or not someone is in that position based purely on whether or not they work in an office. Shit, call centre workers are white collar on paper, and the kind of fuckery a lot of call centre workers are subjected to involves genuine human rights violations.

what a party trick, though

Bad trick! Do NOT!!!

yeah, sure, it was the "power of friendship" that defeated you, and not my super cool "mega bone explosions" spell that I worked really hard on, whatever idiot