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@ch-am

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I fucking love this video

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A magician's curse that permits thee to wibble but forbids wobbling.
um. i think that will make an even awkwarder silence
Man I miss free the nipple. Its getting warmer and we don’t even have free the nipple anymore
one of my classic texts, from the archives
[the most low energy you have ever seen me] we’re about to go crazy mode

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AMAZING ANIMALS BIOLOGY FUN FACTS
”Jesus Christ, what is that?”
”How is it alive?”
"What does it want?"
”Will it hurt me?”
”Will it hurt my children?”
It's only natural to ask questions like this when encountering such a disgusting creature, but rest assured- it's quite harmless!
Meet the hampter.
Hammers are Europe's largest species of insect. They are mostly found in plains, mountains, parking lots, underpasses, the savannah, landfills, trees, and shurbs. They are heavily endangered because they are too stupid to drink water if it's not in a water bottle manufactured for small animals. But evolution has produced a remarkable solution: a female hamper can lay thousands of eggs every day! Most of her young will die of dehydration, but the sheer numbers of hamspers makes it inevitable that at least some will find a water bottle and thus survive to sexual maturity.
Hapster biologist Dr. Lexapro Beaufort said in an interview, "I know of them. They like to sniff around in the dirt for seeds and grass and discarded cigarettes. They like to dig holes in the ground. They were not created by the same God that created everything else."
They can even be kept as pets! One proud hamser mommy had this to say. "Yeah, mine is named Keith and he fucking sucks. He just hides in a hole and only comes out when he hears me rattling my adderall prescription."
Wow! Truly the hater is the fascinating creature of planet earth.
Me and my employee of the month (who is 10)
They need a pride flag for this
My sapphic ass just missed the toilet bowl & slipped in the puddle & fractured muy hulking iron body & now im too crying to get up now theres bugs crawling on me everywhere cuz i spilled my slurpy on my shirt 5 days ago & they want the sugars stuck in it wich i dont even blame them for at all
local scrumptious cake population reduced by one

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"🥪" is shorthand for "🍞🧀🍅🥬🍞"
Leafling Bandana
Find the pattern here
This designer is delightfully fairycore, and should definitely be checked out for whimsy