spotty king

how do people hatewatch things, i can barely find the time to read and watch all the things i actively want to, how the fuck are you putting time aside to watch an entire season of dogshit telly thats just gonna make you mad

i want all my friends and followers and mutuals and acquaintances to know from the bottom of my heart: i don’t respond to your messages because i’m an insane person, i am insane medieval hermit software running inappropriately on modern queer hardware and social media scares me. it is not your fault

when i get a notifications on my phone i try to kill my phone with a rock

“everyone is mad at me and they just won’t tell me” —> “no one has said anything about being mad at me and i haven’t done anything to warrant being mad at so if someone is silently fuming about me and not saying anything that’s their problem and actually quite weird of them and i can effortlessly move on with my life”

this took SUCH a huge deal of unlearning because, like so many of you, i came out of a home where being quietly in trouble WAS the default state, and i DID grow up not just with the assumption but borderline religious conviction that Everyone Is Mad At Me, I Am Bad, I Must Exist In A Constant State of Attempting to Pacify The Natural Rage I Inspire In Everyone. and no it actually turns out that my family are the freaks . and yours are too

The shortest most basic form of the lesson here is just: don’t be mad at yourself on someone else’s behalf. It’s a waste of your time. If they wanna be mad they can do it themselves.

why don't you do arts and crafts for 5 hours and then you'll calm down

it’s psychological horror to YOU. to me it’s a romcom

it's a romcom to YOU. to me it's psychological horror

"what's the worst thing you can do as an artist" is not "shade with black" or "not use references" or whatever the worst thing you can do as an artist is hate yourself. and that includes the person you used to be

"look at how bad my old art is" "this was so cringe" "it's embarrassing to look at this" what are you gaining here? belatedly being your own bully? is it more acceptable to hate a kid if it's the kid you used to be? shut the fuck up. be kind to yourself or don't say anything at all. people are really not laughing with you when you mock yourself and if they are maybe consider hanging out with nicer people. imo.

this also goes for having your personal blog tags be like "nobody cares (name)" or "shut up (name)" or whatever. why are you being mean to yourself. its not preventing other people from being mean to you just because you get the first shot in it just means you get shot twice. how is that better. how is any of that better

ⓘ Tip: while sewing, you can unlock scary sewing by losing your needle somewhere on your bed.

So many people never learned to live with harmless discomfort at any point in their lives and holy fuck does it show

A lot of people were also never told “no” as children and the consequences of that manifest in similar ways. Learn to be ok with being told “no.” You’re not gonna die if you don’t get your way in every single situation ever.

here’s to all the weird little girls growing up into even weirder men

and the weird little whatevers that grew up into weirder whatevers