*cackle cackle cackle*

Your heart is not true enough to enter the gates of Margaritaville

My heart was heavier than the feather; I am sentenced to Rainforest Cafe

at what age does it start sounding wierd to call your baby "it" ?

none. #it/itspronounsbaby #wokebaby #hellyeahwokebaby

gamer boyfriend yells GODDAMNIT! from the other room and throws his headset and you walk in all what's wrong babe :( and he's playing a story-driven indie game

number one rule! never believe ur thoughts after 10 pm . unless its about The Character then believe all of your thoughts wholeheartedly

has anyone seen my pet bacteriophage its name is styrofoam and its about [hand touching the floor] this tall

i'm like a fujoshi but for dead people

a funny thing about having a Problematic Blorbo is that you'll periodically come across a post along the lines of "um let's not forget that [Blorbo] is a bad person..." listing their various crimes, and if you have a modicum of intellectual honesty you find yourself nodding along and saying yeah it's true... but it's the greyness of their character that makes them so compelling... At the same time though you have a little Saul Goodman in your ear going "your honor in their defense: who cares like omfgggg who caresssssss like come onnnnnn"

ma'am we believe your daughter died from dehydration after spending 82 hours straight on TVTropes.com

Every man thinks a conversation is a script and he is CHRISTIAN BALE and u are GIRL #3

Solve my witch's epitaph boy

can't wait for my first day i hope I can fit in :(