Corvid

notice how everyone is horny today

everyone who reblogs this and is like "I ordered my own tea this week" or "I only barfed once when I had to give a presentation'- you are doing amazing sweetie. Have patience with yourself, you are relearning a skill so difficult that people get 4 year degrees to do it professionally.

good news. the things that used to upset me no longer upset me. bad news. i'm creating an army of bugs to hurt innocent bystanders

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

dude, this is really scary, and liminal as well. It's like the bathrooms

that poll going around of the guy who thought "people only eat tofu as a bit because they're deranged vegans" or whatever really crystalizes something that i have never been able to precisely say - which is "a nonzero fraction of people who start picky-eater discourse just happen to precisely hate those foods which are not from north america and refuse to introspect on this whatsoever"

In contrast some people say "there aren't any picky eaters in Asia 🙄" but this is laughably untrue. I have a cousin in India who refused until his 20s to eat anything in a sauce. as you can imagine in India this was difficult. he basically had to pick things out of curry and wipe them dry

When I was at the natural history museum, the fossil section had stickers on the glass to engage children - things like "Flap your arms like a pterodactyl" or "Measure your hand against the mosasaurus." However the first of these I encountered, which I found alarming and threatening without context, was a sticker reading "Struggle like you are stuck in a tar pit"

the drinky thinker...

the drinky thinker...

shout out to the old guy who orders egg wraps from my job every day and came in on christmas with a $25 gift card for the two transfems on staff and no one else. the one true ally.

I wish ziprecruiter and indeed.com had cute marketable mascots so i could make paintings of them opening the hellraiser puzzlebox and getting their skin flayed onto a pillar

it’s your duty to draw that character fatter than in canon

is anyone here ready for fat transgender summer can we give it up for fat transgender summer

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out