.

i’m scared to have kids. like what if i accidentally kill one

Or what if they grow up and hate your fandoms… then it might not be an accident :(

oh my god, what the fuck was wrong with me in 2013. what the fuck. wtf

when i was a toddler i thought god was an imperceivable web of white pulsing membranes stretched over itself a million times and i thought he lived inside the wooden pulpit at my church

This girl found her niche and rolled with it

get that money, honey

I’m thinking about how we say “spill the tea” or just “tea” and how ppl used to say “spill the beans” like what if we just said “beans” when gossiping

me: *gets a surge of motivation that lasts for 10 minutes*

my cat o’malley hates weed. whenever my brother goes out to smoke when he comes back o’malley will leave whatever he is doing to meow loudly nonstop at him.

isnt the point of a museum to preserve history though? id prefer something be in a controlled environment than outside in the elements.

tries to throw a stone into a lake but the lady of the lake catches it and throws it back at mach force killing me instantly 

Snow leopards and their giant nommable tails

the real lie about who gives kids presents at christmas isn’t that they’re from santa (bc everyone over the age of 10 knows that), it’s that they’re from mum ‘and dad’ because 90% of fathers see taking an interest in their kids’ likes and hobbies, let alone actually planning and shopping for things that are ‘from’ them, as something they can opt out of (and nobody talks about it!!!!!!!)