willy

does the body ALWAYS have to keep the score? maybe we could just have a friendly game this time. maybe we can just have fun without putting numbers on it

age regressing to 2 years old but i was an especially erudite and articulate baby so you don't even notice

alternate world where japan’s animation industry reached a point where shows can only succeed by grotesquely fetishizing the male characters’ testicles instead of the female characters’ breasts, to the point that all male characters have clearly visible testicles in all their outfits and there’s always at least one dude who has really huge balls and his skinny jeans are like vacuum sealed onto his legs so it’s like he’s basically bottomless and his balls are the focal point of every shot he’s present in and they sort of waft around unnaturally with every movement he makes and all the male characters openly compare testicle sizes and get jealous of the dudes with larger testicles and certain character archetypes are defined by their the size of their balls

shane’s slutty little shorts. send post

Bitches wanna buy their boyfriends the latest consoles but when was the last time he CONSOLED you? ps 5 years ago

im not above eating some low hanging fruit like if theres low hanging fruit i might eat some

truly some people have no genre savviness whatsoever. A girl came back from the dead the other day and fresh out of the grave she laughed and laughed and lay down on the grass nearby to watch the sky, dirt still under her nails. I asked her if she’s sad about anything and she asked me why she should be. I asked her if she’s perhaps worried she’s a shadow of who she used to be and she said that if she is a shadow she is a joyous one, and anyway whoever she was she is her, now, and that’s enough. I inquired about revenge, about unfinished business, about what had filled her with the incessant need to claw her way out from beneath but she just said she’s here to live. I told her about ghosts, about zombies, tried to explain to her how her options lie between horror and tragedy but she just said if those are the stories meant for her then she’ll make another one. I said “isn’t it terribly lonely how in your triumph over death nobody was here to greet you?” and she just looked at me funny and said “what do you mean? The whole world was here, waiting”. Some people, I tell you.

horror movies are so much scarier when the actors look like an average sampling of the human population. and the house is a little messy

when everyone has veneers and the house is pristine and tastefully decorated: (in the front of my mind) these people had it coming

i love how sinners was basically like “the cunnilingus was there. it didnt change anything. it didnt save anyone. there were just too many forces against it. but it still matters that the cunnilingus was there”

You just hate me because the patterns on my clothes move around like they do on chowder and yours don’t