Underrated love language is when people bring you fresh fruit as a gift. bonus points for peeling it for you

White women be like “therapy”

I love when people with brown eyes look up. you wouldn’t get it

Imagine being able to control the volume in your ears. Please

Stop charging your phone over night

i knew my frontal lobe developed when i started enjoying bad coffee just because it’s still coffee

Android boyfriend will change your life

You know you’re in love when you cook them steak

Sorry i can’t hang out today. im being haunted by the prophecy

Sometimes you need a break from sitting down by getting up and sitting somewhere else

In a world of endless simulations, i find myself unfollowed by reality.

I can’t seem to escape scaffolding. think of it however you like

I love women with a higher vibration and a esoteraesthetic superpower that only works on Tuesdays who is always ready to machine the dutchman out the quill for a drilling rig

Bonding with people over your mutual dislike for the portuguese language is one of the highest forms of intimacy

Take a bold step toward that dream you’ve been keeping quiet