Sirius & Harry Week - Nightmares
Prompt: Family Feels or Nightmares
@siriusandharryweekarchive
This is hot off the press, but you know I gotta get in on Sirius & Harry week. Here I've slipped in not only nightmares but also, sick fic :)
In his dreams, heās the one to cast the Killing Curse. In his dreams, he forgets that it was Voldemort, and he cannot remember that James died first. In his dreams, the door opens wide, and James and Lily beam, pleased to see him, grateful for his company, and he kills them both and Harry too. But Harry isnāt a baby. Instead, he is the boy Sirius met just last year, and when the jet of green light hits, the boy is still smiling when he hits the floor. The dream doesnāt end there, but he wants it to stop. He kneels and sees their smiles lingering, and he can pretend theyāre sleeping. And he knows itās a dream, but he cannot get freeāor perhaps he doesnāt want to because James is still warmā
There is a tug on his arm. He looks down, frowning. Harryās eyes have flown open and he is saying Siriusās name.
āBut youāre dead,ā he tells Harry.
āIām not. Youāre asleep.ā
āI know. I canāt wake up.ā
The damp autumn evening drips away as Harry shakes his arm. And sure enough, the cottage is gone, and Sirius realizes, blinking, that their places are switchedāhe is lying on the ground, and Harry is the one that kneels.
It is a moment before he remembers the cave. A deep ache courses through his thighs and arms, and he knows that whatever illness he has must have matured in his sleep to become a plague on his pathetically frail immune system. Heās so cold. He must have been so weak that he couldnāt hold his Animagus form.
āHarry?ā Sirius croaks. His throat burns. āWhat the hell are you doing here?ā
āYou havenāt written,ā says Harry. āI thought something might be wrong. And I was right.ā
āYou should have sent Dumbledore.ā
But Sirius, annoyed as he is that Harry is so flippant with his own safety, is also warmed by Harryās concern. When a shudder wracks Siriusās body, a cloak is thrown over him.
āYouāre really ill,ā Harry mutters. āNo wonder. Itās freezing in here. Why donāt you sleep on Buckbeak?ā
āSometimes he crushes me,ā says Sirius. He winces as he tries to sit. Harry watches him with his own doubting grimace.
āMaybe you should go back to sleep.ā
Sirius wrinkles his nose at the thought of returning to his nightmare. He cannot bear the thought of leaving the world where Harry lives to sink into one where Harry is dead.
āIāll be all right,ā Sirius assures him. āItās not a Hogsmeade weekend, is it? Youāll have to go back to school.ā
āItās fine. No one saw me leave, and Iāve got my dadās cloak. Ron knows Iām here, so I can stay all night, really. You can sleep; Iāll make sure youāre all right.ā
The terror of his nightmare keeps him awake. The cave floor is frigid, and usually, it doesnāt bother him, but now, it is like sleeping on a frozen lake. His weakness pushes him to the ground and heās fighting to keep his eyes open.
āI think you should rest, Sirius.ā
Sirius doesnāt want to admit the truth. āWe never chat, you and I,ā he says. āWeāve finally got a chance, now. Tell me something. Talk to me.ā
And perhaps it is Harryās ploy to get him to sleep because he starts talking about his schoolwork and the pointless, annoying squabbles between Ron and Hermione, specifically one that just happened this morning, and as Harry gets comfortable, he goes on to talk about girls and his budding feelings for one who turned him down for the Yule Ball, and Sirius canāt help himself from drifting off, squeezing a warm hand and forgetting what it was that he had feared about falling asleep in the first place.