He’s coming to boop you
everyone needs to experience being booped by this little seal
The pure delight you feel as the seal gets closer is definitely worth it
I feel it. I feel the delight.

@theartofmadeline

blake kathryn

shark vs the universe
🪼
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
One Nice Bug Per Day
cherry valley forever
Sade Olutola
Fai_Ryy
Cosmic Funnies

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

pixel skylines
YOU ARE THE REASON
ojovivo

Game Changer & Make Some Noise

izzy's playlists!
Not today Justin

tannertan36
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Noah Kahan
seen from Pakistan

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@bitastic-bat
He’s coming to boop you
everyone needs to experience being booped by this little seal
The pure delight you feel as the seal gets closer is definitely worth it
I feel it. I feel the delight.

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ok this is important to me. gaslighting is not a synonym for lying. it’s a type of lying. if someone says to you “the sky is green,” that’s a lie. if you say “the sky is blue” and they respond “no, it’s green, you’re wrong, your eyes are playing tricks on you” THAT’S gaslighting. the crucial requirement is that they try to convince you not only that you are wrong but that you shouldn’t trust your own senses. that you’re imagining something/hallucinating/dreaming. the abuser is trying to make themselves more of an authority on reality than your own mind, often with the goal of making you reliant on them to tell you “truth” from “fiction.”
also a crucial part of gaslighting:
the gaslighter has to know they are giving you incorrect information. they have to know, on some level, that they are manipulating you. If someone is giving you bad information because THEY have bad information, because their eyes and ears and perception can’t be trusted, it’s important to know that. That’s not gaslighting, it’s just the other person being wrong. It does happen.
여어- 히싸씨부리 ( ɔ̸ᴉʇɐ͟N͞さんのツイート )
“NAFTER NOON!”
Every. Time. Every single time. I always get so delighted by this picture set. And I always forget what it’s followed up by. And then I see the “NAFTER NOON!” and absolutely lose it. I’m so glad this post exists.
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJsMrwMo/
Kenellä oli zombieminkit marras-/joulukuussa apokalypsibingossa?

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Do y’all know where the phrase “eat the rich” comes from or do you just repeat it cause you heard it elsewhere?
It’s not a bad thing, I just saw someone say “we never said who would eat the rich” and realized a lot of y’all might not have heard the full quote
It’s from Rousseau and it’s “When the people shall have nothing more to eat, they will eat the rich"
And, well, there’s a lot of people with nothing to eat…
The poor cried,
"We are starving. There is no more bread, and we have nothing to eat."
The rich man said,
"Not my problem you don't work for your bread,"
as if he did not snatch away the grain by his own greedy hands and create filling bread for his own overflowing mouth.
The poor cried,
"We are dying. There is no more medicine, and we're all ill."
The rich man said,
"Not my problem you don't take care of yourselves,"
as if he did not buy all the medicine and raise prices so high
the gods themselves would not
be able to reach.
The poor people
stopped crying,
and the rich man was satisfied...
Until they came knocking at his door one night;
their faces were sunken,
their flesh decaying,
their eyes sightless.
They were monsters
of the rich man's
own making.
As they devoured his flesh,
the rich man cried,
"Please, spare me!"
The ravenous zombies said,
"Not our fault
you fattened yourself
for slaughter."
Holy fucking shit
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudes
when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia
When Russia sends you nudes
#what the fuck happened here
This is my favorite post in all of tumblr
reminder that this post is now illegal in Russia
reblog it, because Russia can´t
Thanks Obama
When Russia makes this post illegal
I HAVE ONLY SEEN THIS IN SCREENSHOTS
I will reblog this every goddamn time I find it on my dash
I have found a Legendary Post
yhdellä etäluennolla kuultua:
<aihe muute tanskan kieli>
tää tunti on todella hauska ... tai kivualias
*asentaa taustakseen carlsbergin mainoksen, jossa mads mikkelsen “to set the mood”*
*kukaan ei vastaa kysymykseen* ...pelkureita ootte kaikki
missä on teidän INTOHIMONNE tanskaa kohtaan ?!
*kissa naukuu taustalla* suokaa anteeksi, kissani on norjalainen.
[henkilö x] oli tanskan pääministeri kahdesti -nykyään hän hengailee instagrammissa.
tämä [tanskan vokaalit] on ns logiikan tyhjiö
Tiger checking the depth of a watering hole before getting in
(Source)

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Firefighter demonstrates how to put out a kitchen fire
Reblog to actually save a life
To explain. The latter works because you’re cutting off the supply of oxygen to the fire and suffocating it
as opposed to slapping oxygen inside the pan with the downward motion
Reblogging, because this is so important. When I was learning how to cook for myself in my tweens, I had at least a five years of fire safety seminars from school drilling this into my head, and I STILL had that instinctive put-the-fire-out-with-water reflex. Didn’t even think. I saw our oily burner catch fire after frying eggs, whipped around towards the sink for water, and my brain immediately screamed NO!!! NO WATER! I mean that fire safety stuff straight up bitchslapped me out of REFLEXIVELY setting my house on fire. I found a pot lid and inched it over the burner before turning off the heat. Even if you think you know this stuff, panic is powerful shit. Make knowledge more powerful.
“Even if you think you know this stuff, panic is powerful shit. Make knowledge more powerful.”
(source)
Whoa, I didn’t realize that it was so deliberate, I honestly thought it was unconscious
Scary, scary.
Gonna add on to this: From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, “serve her a stronger drink, I’m trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?” usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I’m a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl’s more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her. But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don’t know is buying you a drink, they’re NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they’re buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down. So:
Tips for getting drinks-
1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you’re none the wiser.
2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn’t give two shits that you’re not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don’t want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you’d like something light, and that’s a big clue to us that you’re uncomfortable with whomever you’re standing next to. Again, we see this all the time.
3. If you’re in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol:
Here’s a list of light liquors, and mixers that won’t get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail:
X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state.
Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%.
Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%.
Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21%
Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%.
Hope this helps someone out!
Backing this up from years of bar tending.
Adding to this:
When I was a fresh bartender, I had a couple sitting in the corner, already drinking when I started my shift. They seemed like they knew each other really well considering how much they had their hands on one another. But I still came by and asked if they were okay. The man just waved me off while the woman said, “I need some water.”
The man laughed it off and told me, “She doesn’t need any water. She’s fine.”
She was not fine. Clearly. I decided I was going to cut the two off anyway and bring them some water. As I was filling up the glasses, I heard the woman say, “Stop. I said no. I don’t feel good.”
Her tone and attitude changed instantly. She kept pushing his hand away when he reached for her face, turned her head away when he tried to kiss her. Loudly told him, “Stop. I’m done for tonight.”
So I made sure to refill her water the moment she finished it, and I stayed within earshot of them the whole night. And every time I did, the man got mad at me, told me to leave them alone. Their friends were there, surrounding them and told me that those two always fought when they were drunk and apologized, so I relaxed a little. But the last time I refilled her drink, I heard a loud crash.
She fell out of her stool and hit her head on the floor. And he calmly drank his drink. Their friends didn’t even blink. I jumped over the bar to tend to her and he just said, “Don’t worry, I’ll take her home. She always ends up like this. She drinks too much.”
But it didn’t sound right.
Then the woman began convulsing.
I yelled for the other bartender to call 911 and when I did, the guy suddenly disappeared. I tried asking thr friends questions about him and they just blew it off as the woman being a black our drunk. And one of them said, “We’ll get her home. Don’t worry.”
But when thr EMTs showed up with the police, they all disappeared too.
A few days later the woman came with an attorney. She asked me and the other bartender who worked before me some questions. Turns out, she didn’t know any of those people. They weren’t her friends or her boyfriend. They had met that night, when the guy asked her if he could buy her a drink. At the hospital, they found traces of Rohypnol in her system.
The guy had Roofied her. And his friends were in on it.
The security camera footage showed he had put something in her drink when she left for the bathroom before my shift.
So seriously, it happens. You have to be careful with your drinks! Always watch it, don’t let anyone handle it, and take it with you wherever you go–even the bathroom. Or if you’re a regular at that bar, ask the bartender to put it behind the bar. We’ll do it.
Rb for that last add, don’t ever worry about being polite! Protect urself!
REBLOG AND SPREAD THE WORD!
Never EVER trust men
Take it one further, never, ever, trust strangers. Look, I’ve flown wing man with many a friend, gay, straight, and any other stripe of the rainbow. I’m your drink watcher, I’m the sober driver, I’m getting everyone home. Unless we’ve agreed, in advance, that you aren’t coming home with me…and even then you get a status check before you split. I’ve seen women play just as dirty as men. It’s great to have drinks bought for you, but you owe them nothing. Remember, you didn’t ask that person to buy you a drink, they just did. If you don’t have a watcher, and the bar can’t cover, either finish the drink before the bathroom, take it in with you, or simply never finish it. You didn’t buy it, you aren’t out anything!
Non-alcoholic drinks that look like booze:
Seltzer water or club soda with a wedge of lime or lemon
Ginger ale or Sprite with a splash of grenadine (aka Shirley Temple)
Spicy V-8 or tomato juice
Coke and grenadine (aka Roy Rogers)
Iced tea and lemonade (aka an Arnold Palmer)
Kombucha
Sparkling cider or grape juice
You can also ask for virgin mojitos, daiquiris, or pretty much any fancy cocktail - bartenders have plenty of simple syrups and juices they can combine for something spectacular without a drop of alcohol.
Reblogging for this last list especially because guys, don’t assume how much alcohol you can handle if you don’t know.
Drunk Bitch Hierarchy of Needs

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