problematic sudoku solving skills gap
Misplaced Lens Cap

JVL
art blog(derogatory)
noise dept.

izzy's playlists!
d e v o n
Aqua Utopiaļ½ęµ·ć®åŗć§čØę¶ćē“”ć
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Jules of Nature

ē„ę„ / Permanent Vacation
Game of Thrones Daily
i don't do bad sauce passes

Kiana Khansmith
todays bird
sheepfilms

if i look back, i am lost

pixel skylines
styofa doing anything
Xuebing Du

seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
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seen from Germany

seen from Malaysia

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@bi-rex
problematic sudoku solving skills gap

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actually pigs shouldn't be at pride even outside of uniform. fuck those guys
if you decide to become a police officer then that outweighs any other marginalised identity you can rustle up like. not sorry, who asked you to willingly become a pig
I have heard of black people warning their kids that the race of a police officer is cop and you should not expect solidarity from them. The same applies to other types of minorities.
The sexuality of a police officer is cop.
The gender of a police officer is cop.
When you become the enforcer and protector of capital, you are making the deal to be slightly favored by the system over others like you, in exchange for being its servant. Your solidarity is with the system that you serve, even if it hates you.
If you want solidarity with those the system hates, you cannot be the system's servant and defender.
in absolute tears about the pride module at my work
HOLY SHIT GUYS, I WAS INSPIRED BY THIS POST TO TRY MAKE THE SONG AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT WHEN I DRAGGED THE TRAINING AUDIO OVER THE BACKING TRACK AND IT LINED UP PERFECTLY
Tempted to actually put this on spotify so I can secretly stream it at work...
Tagging @batshit-auspol because as an Australian you're the only big account I know who might share (sorry).
happy first day of pride everyone
awww the like button turns into a rainbow when you press it! that's so cute...hey staff what's with all the trans women you keep nuking?
i think we should be ridiculing them more for this. you don't get to try and go all "queer website" when your staff likes to go on nuking sprees targeting the trans fem users
would be remiss not to mention that the rainbow notably straight up just removed the trans flag colors from it. like theyāre gone. itās the progress flag minus the trans flag colors.
thatās not the whole flag, now is it
hey staff what the fuck
hey staff don't you think you're being too on-the-nose
HEY STAFF DONT YOU THINK YOU'RE BEING TOO ON-THE-NOSE

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reblog to summon godzilla directly into washington dc
are you squeamish about needles?
yes
yes but only shots/injections (not IVs)
yes but only of IVs (not injections)
no
nuance
NUANCE. NUANCE!
I love getting stabbed by needles, there's probably something wrong with me how much I like it
peeling those sour rainbow gummy strips into long thin strings and putting them into cheap energy drink to create something im calling battery acid spaghetti will update once ive finished it
dont do this
I really hope its not too bad bc i actually love both components.
it forms a dry skin at the top made of the sour pellets. not a great start.
tastes really good actually. i also feel like i am about to explode.
do not do this.
Unanimous consensus: Do not do this
Other people: Hold on Iām about to do this
Rip to y'all, but I'm built different. Trying this tonight
Best I can do with what I have (I'm at work rn)
Oh that is a... fascinating smell
Don't do this
Alright now Iām curious
Didn't have strips so I made what I call battery acid cereal
Don't do this
World Heritage Post
calvin and hobbes
"You misspelled Weltanschauung" is one of the funniest punchlines I've ever encountered.
one of my faves

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audio On ššš
For blind/visually impaired folks: The instruments being used to recreate these songs are two kazoos, a plastic shopping bag, a metal colander pot, a basting brush, an empty water jug, and a thin sheet of plastic, all being played by two people in an empty parking garage for the acoustics
For deaf/HoH folks: The songs being played here are near perfect renditions of the 20th Century Fox theme, the Pirates of the Caribbean theme, and the Mission Impossible theme
I can't get over how he just grabs her head and shakes while she plays kazoo to make the opening trill to the mission impossible theme
What if at the end of the Met Gala all the other celebrities devoured the corpse of the most boringly-dressed guest in a Bacchic frenzy. I think that would spice things up a little
A 15-year-old boy is about to base his entire personality on the last movie you watched for the next 10 years. HOW BAD IS IT?
He is going to get himself killed. Badly.
He is going to (try to) kill himself
The most obnoxious person in the world has just been born
FURRY (derogatory)
FURRY (normal)
Not much has changed? But now he's stuck like this for 10 years? Yikes.
It's cringe but it could have been a lot worse
At least he'll have fun at Comic Con
If anything this is a slight improvement.
He's not a boy anymore. He's a man now.
She's not a boy anymore. She's a girl now.
FINALLY, a son I can be proud of!
remember when I made that post that basically said "don't forget about a southern hemisphere when worldbuilding" and a lot of people said "ahhh but what if my fantasy world is flat or shaped like a kia sorento? checkmate I Write What I Want" and then you go and find out that people actually forget that the southern hemisphere exists in real life, like right now here in earth
my worldbuilding posts have two key components:
here's a thing you should think about to make your world more believable and cohesive :) it could really enhance your plot and characters and it's also fun to think about it, when you know how the real world works you can make more vivid fantasy worlds!
and you also should think about it so you think about something else that isn't your own fucking hemisphere pedazo de gringo imperialista
So half of the fantasy planet needs to be experiencing summer when its winter in the north? Is that the endpoint of this post? An episode of the magic schoolbus?
I don't know what to tell you. Read the post again.
What is this thing
Investigation on his nature
transcript under the read more
its like when you use a magnet to pick up metal shavings looks like a worm on a string that got put in the washing machine childhood stuffed animal held together by hopes and dreams eyebrow the bedraggled beast the wicked threshing flail my tuube non euclidean looking mf ink spill eyebrow the humble apostrophe melanistic woolly worm a lower holly leaf cuties good lord what happened to you little guy it looks like it got chewed echo look cats i pulled that out of the tub drain well loved pipe cleaner mascara brush that thang got scriddled
garfield 7/26/1983

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Not sure how this works when shark skin is so incredibly smooth
I have three monitors on my desk. The left one shows the order book. The middle one shows Truth Social. The right one shows the investigation queue.
On April 21st, the left screen moved first.
I am a Senior Surveillance Analyst at a commodities exchange. I have held this position for nineteen years. My job is to monitor trading activity for suspicious patterns and generate compliance reports. I am employee of the quarter. I have a mug.
At 19:54 GMT on April 21st, someone placed 4,260 sell orders on Brent crude futures. They did this during post-settlement. The window after the market closes when daily volume is typically in the dozens. Sometimes single digits. Sometimes I watch the screen and nothing happens for forty minutes and I think about whether my daughter is happy.
On April 21st, someone placed $430 million in directional bets in 120 seconds during that window. One hundred and twenty seconds. I timed it on my watch because the system clock rounds to the nearest minute and I have found, in nineteen years, that precision matters to no one but me.
At 20:10 GMT, the President posted on Truth Social that he was extending the Iran ceasefire.
Brent dropped from $100.91 to $96.83.
I flagged the trade. I flag a lot of trades. I want to tell you what happens to my flags.
My flags go into a system called TRACE. Trade Review and Compliance Evaluation. I did not name it. The system generates a report. The report goes to a committee. The committee has a name I am not allowed to share but I can tell you it meets quarterly and the conference room has a credenza with bottled water that is sparkling because someone once put still water in the room and a managing director sent an email about it that was longer than most of my surveillance reports.
The committee reviews my flags. The committee has reviewed all of my flags. Here is the complete record of actions taken on my flags in 2026:
Reviewed.
That's it. "Reviewed" is a status. In compliance, a status is the absence of an action that has been given a name so it looks like one.
Let me show you my flags.
March 9th. Someone bet millions on oil falling at 18:29 GMT. Forty-seven minutes later, a CBS reporter posted that the President said the Iran war was "very complete, pretty much." Oil dropped 25%. Forty-seven minutes. I flagged it.
March 23rd. Someone sold 5,100 lots of Brent and WTI crude futures between 10:49 and 10:50 GMT. Fourteen minutes later, the President posted on Truth Social about a "COMPLETE AND TOTAL RESOLUTION" to hostilities. Oil dropped 11%. Over 13,000 contracts traded in sixty seconds after the post. Fourteen minutes. I flagged it.
April 7th. Someone established a $950 million short position in oil futures at 19:45 GMT. Three hours later, the President declared a two-week ceasefire. Nine hundred and fifty million dollars. I flagged it.
April 17th. Someone placed $760 million in bearish bets twenty minutes before Iran's foreign minister confirmed the Strait of Hormuz would reopen. Seven hundred and sixty million. I flagged it.
April 21st. The $430 million. Fifteen minutes. I flagged it.
That is $2.1 billion in directional oil bets in April alone. Every one of them landed on the correct side of a presidential announcement. Every one of them was placed in a window so narrow you could measure it in bathroom breaks. I flagged every single one.
The CFTC chair told a Congressional committee that his organization has "zero tolerance" for fraud and insider trading. I wrote that quote on a Post-it note and stuck it to my right monitor. The one that shows the investigation queue. The investigation queue has not moved since March.
Zero tolerance. Zero staff. Zero budget. Zero prosecutions under the STOCK Act since it was signed in 2012.
Fourteen years. The law has existed for fourteen years and has been enforced zero times. In compliance, we call that a compliance rate of one hundred percent. No cases filed means no cases lost. You cannot fail an audit you never conduct. We call that excellence.
Last month the White House sent an internal email to staff. I was not on the distribution list but I have read reporting on it and I need you to sit with what I am about to say. The email instructed White House staff not to use insider information to place bets on prediction markets.
The White House had to send a memo telling its own employees not to insider-trade.
I want you to read that sentence again. Not because the instruction was unclear. Because the instruction was necessary. Because someone in the building looked at the same pattern I have been flagging for months on my three monitors and decided the appropriate response was an email.
The President's son sits on the advisory board of Kalshi. He is an investor in Polymarket. Both are prediction markets. Both saw accounts created days before U.S. military action.
One account. I cannot stop thinking about this account. It was called "Burdensome-Mix." It was created in December. On January 2nd, it placed $32,500 on Venezuela's president being removed from power. On January 3rd, Maduro was seized by U.S. special forces. Burdensome-Mix collected $436,000. Then it changed its username. Then it disappeared.
One account is a coincidence. But there were six.
Six accounts were created on Polymarket in February. All bet on U.S. strikes on Iran by the 28th. When the President confirmed the strikes, the six accounts collected $1.2 million between them. Five of the six never placed another bet. The sixth went on to correctly predict the ceasefire date and made another $163,000.
My surveillance system logged all of this. My system logs everything. My system does not have opinions and neither do I. I generate reports. The reports go to committees. The committees meet quarterly. Between meetings, the windows get shorter and the bets get larger.
March 9th: 47 minutes. March 23rd: 14 minutes. April 17th: 20 minutes. April 21st: 15 minutes.
The window is compressing. In March, you had time to make coffee between the trade and the announcement. By April, you had time to send a text. By summer, at this rate, the trade and the announcement will be the same event.
The spokesman said any implication that administration officials are engaged in insider trading is "baseless and irresponsible reporting."
Then the White House sent the email again.
I have been in compliance for nineteen years. I have seen insider trading run out of strip mall offices by men who could not spell "derivative." I have seen pump-and-dump schemes coordinated over WhatsApp by people who used their real names. I have seen a man try to manipulate soybean futures from a Panera Bread.
I have never seen $2.1 billion in perfectly timed trades across five presidential announcements in a single month go uninvestigated.
But I have also never seen a compliance system work this beautifully. Every trade flagged. Every report filed. Every committee briefed. Every quarterly meeting attended. Bottled water: sparkling. Minutes: distributed.
Zero prosecutions.
As long as the flags go up and the cases don't, my performance review says I am meeting expectations.
I am meeting expectations. The system is meeting expectations. The $2.1 billion is meeting expectations. The fourteen-year-old law with zero prosecutions is meeting expectations.
The left screen moves. The middle screen moves. The right screen stays perfectly, immaculately still.
In my field, we call this price discovery.