okay after watching dinner in america a second time, i have (many) more thoughts!
my favorite thing about this movie is how it subverts usual perceptions of people similar to the main characters by using comedic moments as a device. i do not consider this movie a comedy. rather, it switches between comedic scenes and serious moments to make a serious point. visually, the comedic scenes are characterized by jump cuts, choppy zoom-ins, and essentially breaking the fourth wall with a straight-on view of the characters which looks like they're making direct eye contact with the camera. these scenes also often have overdramatized actions and lines, which are intended to make the audience laugh. obviously, these scenes are almost always the dinner scenes. they essentially serve as a satirization of "traditional" american family structures and the idea of the "normal, good" american citizen. it makes sense that they used dinner scenes because the "family dinner" is like the classic manifestation of the "good american family" idea. these scenes are constantly contrasted against the heartfelt and serious scenes between patty and simon, which is a jump that can feel almost jarring at times. although "funny" things happen in scenes where the movie focuses on them (simon failing to make the basket, for example), these moments are never overdramatized or edited in a way that makes the characters or actions seem absurd. instead, the moments of comedy among the two protagonists feel like realistic facts of life. instead of the awkwardness being a joke, it serves as a way of making the movie feel more genuine and relatable. in other words, the way the movie is shot and edited makes these "traditional family dinner" scenes seem like a joke, while maintaining respect for simon and patty as people, despite their constant awkward and silly moments.
the reason why this is so subversive is because it directly opposes what happens in most media. usually, characters like patty and simon are used as comedic effect amidst "normal" people. but in this movie, patty and simon are portrayed as almost the only real people in the whole movie, while the rest of the characters are shown as being laughable or outlandish. the movie takes preexisting tropes of the classic "family dinner conversation" and treats those classic phrases and moments as laughable. by using these well-cemented lines instead of making up a new idea of what the "family conversation" looks like, the movie directly critiques that "normal family conversation," making it into a ridiculous performance (which it is).
on the other hand, they include moments that would usually be used for comedic effect in normal films, but frame them as normal, mundane, and even endearing moments. for example, patty bumping into the drum kit would be a classic laugh moment in most comedies. honestly, every single moment of patty's existence would be played up for laughs in many if not most movies. but instead, she is given dignity and the opportunity to be respected as a main character. she's allowed to be an adult, to be genuinely regarded as sexy and cool and attractive, and even to express joy "abnormally" while still having all of these things appreciated by the film. "is this provocative" is Not framed as a comedic moment, despite it being silly and slighty awkward. it's just a normal and genuine moment in her and simon's relationship. this subversion is most obvious in the film's treatment of patty, because neurodivergent women are just so constantly made fun of by media, but simon's character also experiences this. the stereotype of the "angry, kinda stupid punk rock guy" is so overused and tastelessly done by many movies. and for me, the most important thing is that they don't actually change any typical traits of these characters. simon is still overly agressive and swears too much and is generally unreasonable. patty is still clumsy and awkward and doesn't understand some things and expresses emotion unconventionally. the movie COULD have taken these classic stereotypes and tried to subvert them by saying "well actually these types of people aren't like that AT ALL and they're really super normal and likable just like You and Me!!" but instead the movie said "well a lot of people ARE like this and they can still be interesting, complex and likable characters if you consider them as real people... and you know who's actually really weird?? your average white middle-class traditional american family dynamic."
this is why i felt so frustrated after looking up other people's opinions on the film. i hate that this is branded as a comedy, when really it's a scathing critique of american ideals wrapped up in a heartfelt romance between two people who do NOT fit those ideals. this movie is not meant for the people that think it's a comedy. it's meant for people who genuinely relate to the main characters and see how ridiculous those classic societal expectations of the "normal american family" are.
anyways those r my thoughts. i thought it was really really good. you should definitely watch it if you haven't
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