la morte vivante

wow you have dogshit taste (remembers im trying to be nicer to people who like different things) uh i mean, it's beautiful how the breadth of human experience is so wide it encompasses those with good taste and those with dogshit taste

Fuuuuck dude I got drunk last night and tried to take down the villain on my own and now he’s texting me some ‘I’m the only one allowed to defeat you’ shit bro what do I do

Man he just yelled ‘I want him alive’ to his goons, it’s so over.

they hate me because the years of memory loss has purified my mind

Live. Laugh. Longsword.

tequila is like drinking the tears of a very happy young woman and whiskey is like drinking the tears of a very sad old man and gin is like drinking the tears of a closeted gay man named james

i wish you could laugh react eBay listings. that's not worth $250. you fucking asshole. lmao

you should also be able to do this to job listings