i'm literally the priest's favorite sacrificial lamb because i am so docile and sweet and i hold very still when they put the rope around my neck and i trot along so happily while they lead me to the altar and they do not even have to tie me down because i lie so very still and only bleat once or twice in my lovely lamb voice and when the knife comes down it cuts through me like butter and i offer no resistance and i bleed so prettily all over my new white wool and my guts all unspool like the most beautiful shining yarn and my eyes are animal and dumb and hold no accusation and every time i die i come right back as another little lamb because the priest loves me so so much and he always chooses me for the sacrifice every time and he always places one hand on my small and twitching nose to calm me while he lifts the knife and he doesn't do it for the other lambs only me because i'm his favorite

we need personally tailored hormone cocktails. if u want estrogen curves a non functional dick and a flat chest u should be able to get that. if u want huge tits hard cock huge loads we should promote that. when i’m president we’ll kill all real estate agents in the street like dogs.

I just Want this shirt

apparently the kids at summer camp are obsessed with playing an irl version of Among Us and today i helped scheme with the other interns and counselors to come up with a list of “tasks” for the kids to do, which is really just chores to be done around the farm that we don’t want to do. and they love it. the kids love it. thank you, Among Us.

This is a form of positive psychology that is called “Micro-adaptions” - Small, incremental or everyday changes that allow you to function better. It’s based around the concept that sometimes, the biggest hurdle to doing a task is that you see it as its own standalone task, and that makes it intimidating to try to tackle. Find a way to tack on the tasks that you want to do with tasks you already know you’re gonna do, and it’s easier to do them. Things you know you’re going to do are already gonna happen, so while you’re waiting for your cup noodle to be ready, or for your meal to warm up, or for your coffee to brew, you can also brush your teeth! If brushing your teeth as a standalone activity is hard, add it into your shower technique. You can put weights next to the toilet for arm or leg reps while you’re in there. There are no real rules in this world. Just make sure that you’re doing things safely, and you’re fine. Positive Psychology is a lot of fun because it doesn’t focus on trying to cure existing psychological problems, it focuses on taking you from where you are, and trying to improve upon that.

A dating service where matching is based on people’s search history exists. You’re a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer.

A++ addition

how many hands you got

two? don’t see how that’s relevant

that’s still four people

will smith isn’t gay. he has a wife and three beautiful, talented children

I can’t believe this post predicted the live action Aladdin genie

If we lose tumblr how will we ever replace these posts in which every reply feels like a punch in the face

The electronic signs outside of family owned seafood restaurants